kmvanvliet

Send Message

Block

Add Friend

On 3/23/09, I had a bilateral brachiaplasty and lower body lift.  Dr. Christopher Davidson at Tufts Medical Center performed the surgery, and I highly recommend him to anyone who is interested in any plastics.  Anyway, I was very scared about the surgery because so many people said that plastics were more painful than the gastric bypass surgery.  For me, that was not true.  I don't know if it's because I had exercised religiously prior to the surgery, therefor, I was in better shape for this surgery than for the RNY, or what it was, but it really wasn't bad.  My armpits felt like I had a bad sunburn.  The incision around my lower body really didn't bother me too much.  Mostly, I felt like I had done way too many crunches because the doc tightened my abs.  I came home after one night in the hospital with 7 drains and a script for an antibiotic and dilaudin for pain.  Unfortunately, I had an allergic reaction to the dilaudin and, because it's a narcotic, the doc couldn't "call in" a script for a different pain killer.  It had to be in paper format for the pharmacist, and we lived an hour away from the hospital.  He was able to call in an emergency 2 day supply, which he did, and then he mailed me a paper script.  As luck would have it, I ran out of the percocets before the paper script reached me, but I lived through it and all is well.  My biggest piece of advice fo anyone going through the surgery is to take a stool softener right away.  I had the worst case of constipation - painful!  As for the drains, he took 4 of them out at my one-week checkup, and the other 3 came out at my two-week check up.  All in all, I feel pretty well.  I get tired, so I go to bed.  Otherwise, I'm great.  Already thinking about my second and final round, which was going to be breast augmentation and inner thigh lift.  But the lower body lift took care of my buttocks and outer thighs, so I think I can live with the inner thighs the way they are.  They just don't seem quite so bad now.  But I still think I'll be getting the breast augmentation down the road.  Stay tuned. . .

Yesterday was my 1 year surgiversary.  I've lost 120 pounds, gone from a size 22/24 to size 6/8.  My back, knees and feet no longer hurt.  I no longer have hypertension or pre-diabetes.  The cholesterol problem, although still there because of my genetics, is under control.  For the first time in my entire life, I don't have to lose any weight.  I feel great.  Even my "mental fitness" is superb, which I attribute to all the exercise and healthy eating. 

I've been reflecting on my feelings and what-not from the past year and wanted to share some of those thoughts.  I apologize if this starts to ramble . . .

I remember that prior to my surgery, I was so disgusted with myself.  My weight was becoming an obssession -- it was all I thought about.  I was so miserable, and I spent many hours literally crying over the fact that I could not get control of my weight and, therefore, my life.  I had decided to have the surgery and even felt that if I was to be one of those people who died on the table, it would be okay because I didn't want to live like I was living anymore.  Today, I thought back to a lady I once met who had the surgery several years ago.  She had lost about 100 pounds when I met her and appeared to be at her goal.  She knew she needed the surgery because of the heart disease that was rampant in her family.  I later heard that even after she lost the weight (and she exercised regularly and seemed to follow all the rules), she suffered a major heart attack.  As far as I know, she survived it.  I too had a heart attack at the age of 42.  My Dad died from his first heart attack at 46.  My grandmother had her first heart attack at 49.  Today I started thinking about all of that, and I've decided that if I have a heart attack again, then at least I know that I'm doing all I can to prevent it.  If I have it, it's because of the genetics, not the lifestyle.  I won't be happy about it, but I know that it will be out of my control because I am now in control of everything that I can control.  And if I die from it, then I've had some time where I was truly happy with myself and my body.  That has been such a gift for me. 

I'm proud of what I've been able to accomplish in the last year.  I feel good about myself.  I don't remember ever being able to say that.  My first thought is that I feel good about myself  because I look good and am proud of that.  But on further reflection, I think that I'm more proud of the fact that I have finally been able to take control of my life.  Yes, I think I look pretty darn good.  But I have finally learned to make exercise and good food choices a part of my daily routine.  I don't do those things because I have to do them anymore, but because I actually want to do them now. 

I still get the foamies now and then, so I know there is more for me to learn.  I still have to practice mindful eating and yes, even portion control.  Those were two of my biggest problems pre-op, and they haven't gone away yet.  But they do seem easier to tame as time goes on. 

I like to say that my only regret about the surgery is that I didn't have it done sooner.  But really, would I have been ready sooner?  Maybe not.  Things always have a way of working out for the better.  If I had had it done years ago, would I have learned the lessons as well as I think I'm learning them now?  Maybe I'd be looking at a revision or just be depressed because I put on all the weight again.  I don't know.  (Of course, maybe I would have been successful back then too.)  I am so afraid of gaining back my weight.  I think that's a healthy fear.  It keeps me honest.  I haven't really relaxed my routine of writing down all that I eat, all my exercising, and attending support groups.  I hope I never do.  

I think I'm going to reward my hard work of the last year by going out and buying myself a new outfit this weekend.  Because, after all, it really is hard work.  Some of us think it's easy, but I think we're just finally being rewarded for all of our hard work.  Before the surgery, I think we worked just as hard as we do now, but our bodies would just never let us win.  Now the playing field has been leveled, and we are prevailing! 

This question of "Why RNY?" comes up often on the boards.  This is a post I recently made that answers that question:

Where I had my surgery, my choices were lap-band or RNY.  I went to my first consult with the notion that I would have the band.  But after meeting with the doctors AND doing lots of research AND looking at what kind of eater I was, I changed my mind to RNY.  This is why:

-Lap-Band is reversible, but why would I want to reverse the surgery after going through it?  I know that if I reverse the surgery, I gain all the weight back.  If I'm that sick that I have to have it reversed, RNY can also be reversed. 

-Lap-Band has a quicker recovery, but weight loss is somewhat slower in the beginning, and total excess weight loss is somewhat less than RNY.  This was my one shot.  If I failed again or didn't lose all that I wanted to lose, this was it.  I knew I wasn't going to get another chance so I'd better get it right this time.  Plus, I had more than enough sick time accumulated to take the extra time off to recover.

-Liquids (like shakes, ice cream, etc.) go right through the band.  With RNY, you may dump on those foods.  I need to dump.  One may think this is a negative aspect of RNY, but I (as most RNYers) see it as a positive aspect.  I needed to be forced into the discipline of making proper food choices.

-RNY can be an almost immediate cure for diabetes.  I was pre-diabetic and deathly afraid of becoming a full-blown diabetic like most of my family.  I wanted to be sure that that ugly disease never came close to me.

-I didn't like the idea of needing to have fills or of being able to feel the port from the band.

What I've learned since:

I love love love my RNY.  I feel great.  And I find that I really don't crave all the foods that I thought I would miss.  I remember being afraid of the fact that I would never be able to eat those foods that I loved in the portions that I wanted.  That really scared me back then.  Now I look back on those thoughts and feel like it was my addiction to food doing the talking.  I still can eat those foods, but I only want them once in a while and in small portions (isn't that how thin people eat anyway?)  My relationship with food has completely changed.  Of course, I have slips every now and then - I had a big one last night, but generally, I want to eat the right stuff - yes, want to, not just have to eat the right foods.  I think that when Dr. Kim went in and rearranged my insides, she also rewired my brain.  Whether that would have happened to me with the band, I'll never know.  But they say that there are some hormonal changes that do occur with the RNY.  They're not fully understood by the medical community yet, but they do appear to exist. 

My life has changed:
no more backaches
no more prediabetes
no more GERD
no more hypertension
no more shortness of breath
no more plus sizes
no more fear of being out in public
I can proudly go to a party. . .
... and sit in that lawn chair without fear of it breaking
the seatbelt on the airplane fits with extra strap to spare
I can paint my toenails
I don't mind having my picture taken
I like to dance again!

So those are my reasons.  I would have RNY again in a New York minute.  My only regret is that I waited so long to do it.