Steph Wiensz
SEPTEMBER 2006 BLOG
9-1-6 34th day on Optifast. Well I am down 20lbs in 5 weeks. That is 4 lbs lost this week. I am so so excited. My blood work was great, blood pressure and swelling were good. I have to go do a sleep study in just a little bit. This will be very interesting. I will hopefully sleep some. I also love my hair. It is so easy and cute. I feel so much better and positive. Well I have to go fill out the paperwork for my study. Goodnight for now.
9-2-6 35th day on Optifast. Well I did the sleep study. It was not that bad. I think I slept but not sure. It was a different sleep. I used a machine to help with my breathing. So we will see what happens with the results. I have red blotches from the sensors and paste they use. I got out of the study at 530am. I came home and slept till 1030am. I had a good day and feel great. I can’t believe how I feel. It is wonderful. I feel on top of the world. Last week I didn’t think I would make it thru all the emotional stuff but I did. It made me realize how strong I really am. I really love this feeling I can do anything. Well I am off to watch the Busch race on TV. Goodnight for now.
9-3-6 36th day on Diet. Well I tried the Slim Fast and the shakes are good and the bars are even better. So far I have had a Royal Choc Shake and a Cappuccino Shake. They are really good just out of the freezer after 30 minutes in there. The Apple Crisp Bar, Blueberry Bar and Choc Carmel bar are really good. I also found the Lean Pockets in Ham and Cheese, Chicken Fajita, Chicken Quesadilla are really good. I realized today I have so much more energy. I am getting a lot done and it is not bothering me. I also put some of my around the house clothes on and they are getting too big. The shirt I can use as a nightgown. Well I get one more day off and hopefully it is a good day. I have a few projects to do before going back to work on Tuesday. Well now I am going to enjoy my NASCAR Race. Goodnight for now.
9-4-6 37th day on Diet. Well today is Labor Day. I have the day off. I am feeling ok today. I got the Christmas stuff out of storage I wanted and brought it upstairs. I had to carry 3 boxes up the stairs on separate trips. I did well with the stairs. I wasn’t really out of breathe. I was hot but that is normal when you are in workout pants and tennis shoes. I can’t believe how much better I am feeling physically each day. I did some looking a Big Lots and found something’s that I want but was a good girl and got only a candle, which smells so good. I am taking it kind of easy today. I actually am going to sit down and watch a movie and then off to bed. I am actually sleepy right now but since it is only 6pm I have to wait a few hours or I will wake up too soon tomorrow am. So I guess it is Goodnight for now.
9-5-6 38th day on Diet. Well today was a challenge for me. Diet wise I did well. I walked this morning, did the exercises. I ate well. I like the Slim Fast. It takes so good it feels like you are cheating. Personally I had a tough day but a good growing day. Sometimes patience is a virtue. Also waiting is hard but the reward at the end is the best. I have learned those 2 things today. Well I have a bad headache and I am tried. Off to bed. Goodnight for now.
9-6-6 39th day on Diet. Well I was having a good day and felt great. I ate well, went for my walk, and did my exercises. I was heading home tonight stopped for a light by my work. We were stopped a long time which is normal for that light, when some lady in a Mercedes who was also stopped rear ended me. The car is fine. No dent no scratches. I got thru the light and pulled over and cked. I said nothing to the women since the car was fine. I was so mad I didn’t want to do something stupid. The only problem now is I have a bad headache. I was going to walk at the beach tonight and get more of a workout in. I called a friend and they said the headache is normal . If I don’t feel good tomorrow I will be cked out. It just makes me mad that someone was so stupid. The one thing I do know is before this whole process I am going thru if this happened I probably would of flew off the handle. I am growing up and learning control in MANY WAYS. I can’t believe how serious I am about this whole thing. I am happy and proud of myself. Well I am off to bed. Goodnight for now.
9-7-6 40th day on Diet. Well weigh in is tomorrow. Not to sure how I will do. I feel great. Today I noticed how my lower legs have changed. When I started the diet my ankles and legs were very large and swollen. Now they are thinning out and no swelling. I didn’t walk today at all. I had a headache and it took me forever to prep tomorrow's appts. The headache is now gone. I had a good evening watching football and seeing the Steelers’s win. Well hopefully I lost at least a pound. I have a lot of water weight right now. Well Goodnight for now.
9-8-6 41st on Diet. Well I didn’t lose anything this week but I didn’t expect to. I have a lot of water gain right now. I am just happy I didn’t gain. I had a great day. I am so excited and happy with my life. I am enjoying all the ups and downs of my life. It amazes me how far I am with everything in such a short time. Well I best get to bed. I am going into work tomorrow to get ahead. So goodnight for now.
9-9-6 42nd day on Diet. So today I am getting ready to go into work for a little bit when my phone rings and it is an old friend from high school. Shannon Foster (married now new name?). We used to call her Foster. She had been thinking of me for a while and ran into someone that knew my family and my sister gave her my number. It was a wonderful surprise and talk. I was so glad to get back in touch with her. I told her what is going on and has happened. She told me her life and that she has 3 children. It is so weird to go back and talk about the past and where we are now. I got her info and will keep in touch. Diet wise my day was really good. No cheating at all even though on Slim Fast it feels like I am. I got a snack bar that tastes like a Butterfinger. It is so good and only 120 calories. I also got the lean cuisine pepperoni pizza on french bread and it was so good. Only 290 calories. I also spent time with my best friend, Zirley. She and I went to IKEA and got a bookcase. She hasn’t seen me in a few weeks so she was shocked and amazed. She keeps saying you have legs and your butt is getting cheeks. I was so happy and excited. We just talked and shopped and had fun. Tonight I did laundry and watched the NASCAR race. My driver Tony Stewart was bumped out of the chase so that is shame. Well I still have one load to go get. I am trying to shrink some shirts. So goodnight for now.
9-10-6 43rd day on diet. Well today was do nothing day since it was the first Sunday of the regular season of Football. I woke up a little late so I was glad I was TIVO'ing the pre-shows and the games. All the games I watched were good. It was nice to just relax and watch them. Wish Jason was here to watch them with me but still it was fun. Jason and I were big football fans. My diet day was good. I am glad I got the lean cuisine dinners. They taste so good. I feel great. I re-dyed my hair today. Dark Brown, much better than the medium brown. Too lite of a color for me. My mom called me today which was a nice surprise. Dad and Mom are in Alaska on a cruise. Well it is off to bed to get some much needed sleep before a long week of work. So goodnight for now.
9-11-6 44th day on Diet. Well today diet wise I did good. I find I do get hungry with the Slim Fast but I don’t know how much of it is psychological. I am under a lot of stress so that could be it. The computer at work acted up today and we can’t scan in our records for a few days so that puts me under a lot of pressure. I felt myself wigging out at times. After work my friend Linda and I went to Sam's Club shopping. It was so nice to walk around and be able to do it and not be tired. Tonight I didn’t exercise. Mentally I am wiped out. Well this is going to be a long week so Goodnight for now.
9-12-6 45th day on Diet. Well I am so glad I am losing weight. I had such a weird day. First off I am ready to get to work so I call Rebecca and ask her to print a schedule for me. Well she said the power is out. So I get to work and have to go up 3 flights of stairs in the dark. Then I have to go down them in the dark. Then I have to go up them in the dark. Yeh not. So that is how my morning started. If I hadn’t of been doing this program I would of never made it. I actually was really proud of myself. I also had a busy stressful day with the schedules and work for tomorrow. I can’t wait till we are up and can scan. I left work and decided I wanted to get out and shop. I walked around the mall and then went off to Anna's Linens. Very nice store. Meet some really nice people. I am so happy how my life is going. I feel great and really positive. I am very lucky and blessed. Well I am off to watch Dancing With The Stars. Goodnight for now.
9-13-6 46th day on Diet. Well this week is just not going well at all. Today I go into work and our entire computer system is not working. We can’t do anything. Finally after lunch it is working. Tonight the manager is going to run a rebuild and hopefully we can re-scan everything. Well I am exhausted. It was a really really long day. I also had to go out and buy new tennis shoes. My bottom of my left shoe is falling apart. I guess too much exercising. So tonight due to my hellish day and feeling like I can fall over no exercising. I am so ready to go to bed. So Goodnight for now.
9-14-6 47th day on Diet. Well it was a day that I couldn’t wait to get over with. I am so tired. I felt like I could fall asleep at 8am today and never wake up. I was happy with the fact that I could scan in my records. I was so tired I couldn't get much done. I did have a good day though. I got to talk to a rep from Optifast and I understand things better. I also realize that I am so so blessed. I am happy, honest, considerate, loving, beautiful, and someone that will never mean to hurt anyone. I also was so tired today I hardly ate. I weigh in tomorrow so hopefully I lost something. I am turning in early because I also need to get into work early. So Goodnight for now.
9-15-6 48th day on Diet. Well I am dehydrated again. I really feel bad. This has been such a bad week and I am exhausted. I did lose 3 more lbs. So now I am at 304. Either than physically feeling bad, I mentally and emotionally feel great. The nurse practioner wasn’t too happy I got dehydrated. I don’t think I ate or drank much yesterday. I have to make time to take care of myself. So today I have been eating and drinking a lot of water. I am so proud of myself with what I have done in 7 weeks. It is amazing. Well Now I am off to bed. So Goodnight for now.
9-16-6 49th day on Diet. Well I still feel bad. The headache is bothering me. I worked for 4 hours today and then came home and slept. I am taking it really easy. I actually got some Progresso soups to eat to help with increasing my sodium intake. I also bought some different waters to help me drink more. Then I put in the vitamin packets in them to increase my electrolytes. So now I am off to bed. I plan on doing nothing tomorrow. So Goodnight for now.
9-17-6 5oth day on Diet. Well today was another feeling bad day till I got Smart Water and drank 2 of them. Smart water is water that is so fresh and clean with electrolytes. I also got my nails and toes done. I think that relaxed me and made me feel better. I also got to talk to my mom and dad today for a few minutes before my dad had his 60th birthday party. I wish I could of went but I didn’t feel good enough to make the drive which is a 6 or 7 hour drive. I also have a lot of work to do so taking off time is hard. Diet wise I did good. I got some Green Tea packets with mango flavoring and they are really good. Also had soup and a lean cuisine panini sandwich. It was really good. I cant believe I am on day 50. What a huge change in my life. Well I am off to bed early since I want to get to work by 7am and hopefully catch up a little more. Also I have to go have the nurses check my BP and pulse to see how I am and if I am still dehydrated. Well Goodnight for now.
9-18-6 51st day on Diet. Well I am feeling better today. My BP and pulse are better. I drank a lot of water. In fact the bathroom was my friend for most of the day. I also got almost ahead at work. One more day and I should be caught up. I still didn’t exercise today. I don’t want to overdue it. I will walk a little bit tomorrow. I had a good eating day. I also got over 100 oz of water down me. That Smart water is good. I plan on drink 1 liter of it a day and then drinking Aquifina and diet Lipton Green Tea for the remainder of my daily liquids. Well I am off to watch the Steelers game. It is a really interesting game. 3rd quarter and Steelers 0 and Jacguars 3. The sports guys are getting a kick out of the game. So Goodnight for now.
9-19-6 52nd day on Diet. Well today is my dad's 60th birthday. So Happy Birthday Dad. I did call him!! Ok well diet wise, it was hard. The cravings were really bad. I drank coffee this morning and was very hyper all all day. Also in the bathroom all morning due to drink so much water. I also should of took my Tenuate to help with the cravings but was too scared due to the coffee. Not sure of the reaction. I did good until this afternoon when cake came into the office. I took a bite. Then some got out the Cheese Its and junior mints. I didn’t pig out but had a few of each. Tonight the I feel bad about it. I did walk today and tonight. I also did eat good but the snacking got me. So tomorrow I promise to be really really good. Well I am off to watch Dancing with the Stars. So Goodnight for now.
9-20-6 53rd day on Diet. Well today was a bad day. My dad is in the hosp with his heart. He is having a heart cath tomorrow and we will know more tomorrow. I am a wreck emotionally but hanging in there. I am staying put down here till they tell me to go home. Diet wise I am hanging in there. I am wanting everything to eat due to my emotions. I was really good and kept everything in ck. I am so so tired. I am off to bed and have to try to sleep tomorrow will be a long day. So goodnight for now.
9-21-6 54th day on Diet. Well dad is ok. The heart cath showed a narrowing. He is home resting. He is to be referred to UC Davis for a procedure to help with the heart beat and keep it in sync. I am so tired. It was a long emotional day. Eating was not good. I did ok but did cheat. I really mentally, emotionally and physically today was at my max. It was not all about my dad, just a lot of things in general. Life, work, family, etc. I did weigh today in case I had to go home. I gained 2 lbs. I am not upset about it at all. I am exercising and walking a lot. I also had breakfast this morning and drank a 16 oz bottle of water before weigh in. I know that this is not a set back at all. In fact I am sore in my upper legs from all the walking. Well I best get to bed. It is almost midnight. I tried to sleep early but couldn’t. So goodnight for now.
9-22-6 55th day on Diet. Well today was finally a good day even though right now I am having an allergy attack. I got all my work done. I left work early. Paid all the bills I needed to. Went to Target and got the essentials. Bought 4 cheap but pretty flowers. Now I am going to go watch my new show I like called Men in Trees. It is really good. I ate good today. Did my exercises plus carried everything from Target upstairs. I am doing nothing this weekend. May work tomorrow. My cousin Alan is getting married tomorrow in Santa Cruz but I can’t go for various reasons. I wish I could be I need to rest. I plan on watching TV, walking, do some cleaning, laundry and relax. I love the fact that I feel good and have a lot of energy. I can’t imagine not having the energy with everything that has recently happened. Also I am and have learned how precious life is. Sometimes people need a wake up call to get what is important. I also like the fact that I am proving to myself I am ok and independent. Now don’t get me wrong I really love and miss Jason. Time will heal my heart and what happens happens. I am thankful for everything I do have. Also I am proud of who I am and what I am becoming. Well it is off to my show. So Goodnight for now.
9-23-6 56th day on Diet. Well I went for a 1.6 mile walk today. I feel great. I did sleep for 5 hours this afternoon. Diet wise I did really good. I only had 1510 calories today. That sounds like a lot from the 800 calories I was doing. But much better from the 3000 to 4500 calorie diet I was eating. My best friend Tammy just called and we had a long talk while she walked. She is always so positive and gives me her honest opinion. I am so blessed and lucky. I have wonderful friends and family. Well I am off to watch the USC game. So Goodnight for now.
9-24-6 57th day on Diet. Well today was a nice and quiet day. I did nothing and it felt so good. I watched football, NASCAR and painted my nails. I didn’t exercise today. I did eat good and feel so much better. I watched Runaway Bride last night. Tammy my friend made a reference to how Julia Roberts didn’t know how she liked her eggs. I watched it and understood what Tam was talking about. I am going to figure out how I "like my eggs." I have a
9-25-6 58th day on Diet. Ok great diet day. I am finding things I can have and still are great. I had a Grande Lite Moca Frap from Starbucks no whip cream. It is only 180 calories. I got all my water in me and feel really good. I am happy and thankful for where I am and what I have. I am so lucky. So on that note it is time for me to go to bed. So Goodnight for now.
9-26-6 59th day on Diet. Well another good day. I went for a nice walk tonight. Zirley was to go with me but something came up. I ate good today. I actually had my favorite which is Chipottle. I had them make the burrito with half of all the stuff in it. The only problem is I am not use to Chipotle anymore and my stomach told me so. I may not do that again. I broke down and dyed my hair tonight. I was going to wait till Saturday but I couldn’t stand it. I am not sure what is going on with my hair but the color is changing and the texture. Well yes I am off to watch one of my shows. So goodnight for now.
9-27-6 60th day on Diet. Well 2 months on the Diet. I feel good. I do have a really good headache today. I cant believe I have come this far so far. Well this is short. I am off to bed. Headache is probably due to stress and lack of sleep. So goodnight for now.
9-28-6 61st day on Diet. Well another day where I didn’t feel well. Today I am exhausted and achy. I am not sleeping really well. I actually am going to go lay on the couch turn the TV on and hopefully fall asleep. It is only 6pm but I need to sleep thru the night. I was up 5 times last night. Well diet wise I did good. I weigh in tomorrow so we will see. So Goodnight for now.
9-29-6 62nd day on Diet. Well I know why I feel so bad. I dropped 5lbs in 4 days. I weighed on Monday when I had my BP cked. I was 306. Today I am 301. I need to remember to eat my snacks and I am adding in a meal bar in the AM. I ate more today and feel better. So yes I am so excited about the weight loss. I am down 26lbs. That shocks and amazes me. I am so proud and happy. Tonight I went to Target and got a bunch of Slim Fast Optima. It is on
9-30-6 63rd day on Diet. Well the company picnic was nice and it looked like everyone had fun. I did really well with the eating. It was weird because I really didn’t want a
JULY AND AUGUST 2006 BLOG
Oct 15, 2006
7-27-6 I HAVE BEEN HEAVY ALL MY LIFE. I AM AT MY HEAVIEST (326lbs) AND DIDNT REALIZE I NEEDED HELP UNTIL THE MANAGERS AT WORK CAME TO ME. I ACTUALLY WORK FOR ASSOCIATION OF SOUTHBAY SURGEONS, WHICH IS A 15 DOCTOR PRACTICE. WE HAVE TAKEN OVER A BARIARTIC CLINIC AND IT IS WONDERFUL. THE MANAGERS HAD AN INTERVENTION AND ASK ME TO DO THE PROGRAM. I AM THE MANAGER OF MEDICAL RECORDS FOR THE ENTIRE GROUP AND I AM THE ONLY ONE IN RECORDS. I AM DIABETIC AND ON DEPRESSION MEDS. I DO GET ALONG WELL BUT IT IS GETTING HARDER. THE ENTIRE OFFICE, MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS ARE 100% BEHIND ME. IT IS REALLY AMAZING. I HAD MY PHYSICAL ALREADY AND I AM IN THE MIDDLE OF DOING ALL THE TESTS. I CANT WAIT FOR THE SURGERY. I NEED TO LOSE 50LBS 1ST AND I ON OPTIFAST 800 CALORIE DIET TO LOSE THE WEIGHT. THIS IS MY CHOICE TO TRY THE OPTIFAST TO GET MY BODY READY FOR THIS WONDERFUL JOURNEY. HOPEFULLY BY THIS TIME NEXT YEAR I WILL BE A NEW ME. I AM SCARED, ANXIOUS, EXCITED AND INPATIENT BUT POSTIVE.
7-28-6 Well I had my opitifast appt today. I am on Optifast 800 calories a day (that is 5 optifast products a day//160 calories each product) and need to take in at least 64oz of non-calorie liquids. Boy this is going to be fun. I know I can do this, no pain no gain. I am very determined.
7-29-6 1st day on Opitfast. I did ok on the bars and shakes. They are pretty good. I like the strawberry and choc shakes. The peanut butter bars and choc bars are also good. I took in 64oz of water. I didn’t want anything else but water. Kind of strange. I did almost blow it. I put a can of chili in the microwave. But I called my aunt and then realized how dumb I was being.
7-30-6 2nd day on Opitfast. Well I was doing ok with the bars and shakes but tonight I got really sick to my stomach and hit the bathroom. I hate this feeling. Maybe my body is trying to adjust. I got in 80oz of water today.
7-31-6 3rd day on Opitfast and really sick. I weighed myself at work and lost 5 lbs in 2 days. I am drinking my water and got in 100ozs today. I was only on 1 shake and 1 bar. My nurse practioner wanted to see me so I went in. I am dehydrated because everything is coming right out as I eat it. The np said to stop the opitfast today and get some soup and try to see how that goes. So far a little better. I only got sick once. Tomorrow I have to go for my chest x-ray, renal ultrasound, abd ultrasound and UGI. Hopefully tomorrow is a better day.
8-1-6 4th day on Optifast. I had my utz, chest x-ray and UGI today. Not as bad as I thought. I was really worried about not feeling so good afterwards. I did pretty well. Also the nurse practioner said it is ok to do 4 optifast products and a low cal meal. I had a veggie burrito today and I am feeling better. I drank a lot of water to flush out the barium. I am glad today is over with. Tomorrow should be better. I have labs in the morning.
8-2-6 5th day on Optifast. Today was a better day. I had my labs done this morning and it went well. I am a hard draw and have had difficulties in the past. The lab tech had me put a warm pack on my arm and it made my vein show up a lot easier. Also she had me drink 2 8 oz glass of water. I am still weak but getting better. It will take time. I had 4 opitfast products today and lunch was a sandwich on wheat with fruit. I have made it thur all my water and still drinking. It was nice to eat something. No problems with the stomach yet. I am really happy today. I am getting a lot of support from my friends and family. My cousin Stacey signed up on the site to support me. I weigh in on Friday. I am trying. I hope I don’t gain what I already lost. 5lbs in 2 days was a lot to loss. I also have to remember that this is not easy. Today we got my final test scheduled. I am doing testing each week so I don’t feel so overwhelmed with everything. I really want to take my time to do this right. My motto is no pain no gain!!!!!
8-3-6 6th day on Optifast. I feel so good today!! I started out feeling bad and dragging then around 11am I got this energy out of no where. It may have been the appetite suppressants. I had a good lunch of a sandwich again. It was so much easier when I took all my pills today. My stomach wasn’t so bad. Tomorrow I weigh in. I feel like I lost but my head is saying no. I am nervous. I am so glad I am doing this. My skin looks so good and healthy. I just need to get some more energy to start exercising. Well tomorrow will tell if this is all helping get the weight off.
8-4-6 7th day on Optifast. Well today was weigh in day. I lost 8lbs. I am so excited about this. I know that this won’t always happen each time I weigh in but this has given me such a lift. I feel actually really good. Since I got my stomach in control I am not sick all day long. Also the 4 Optifast products and a sensible meal are not that bad. I actually wasn’t hungry tonight. I still ate the bar so I would stay on schedule. I also appreciate all the support I am getting. I am going to do this right 100%. I am doing this for me.
8-5-6 1 week on Optifast. Well I made it thru on of the hardest weeks ever. At first I thought ok I can do the 800 calorie diet. Then getting sick was the worst. I realized I actually need some kind of sensible meal to go with the bars and shakes. I am actually now feeling great. My face is so clear. I am actually looking in the mirror and seeing a different me. I know I only have lost 8lbs but my attitude and mind has changed. I can’t believe how one week I thought I couldn’t go on and then something wonderful happens and I see things so differently. I know that things won’t always be so good and positive but I can look back at these entries and remember the positive times. Also I love having the OH website to look at the pictures of others and see what they have done. It helps me see that others have done what I am doing and made it thru just fine. Also the good thing is all the blogs I read and all the people I talk to have had problems but state they would do things all over again. Today I did figure one really nice thing out. There is a non-fat yogurt place around the block called Golden Spoon. There yogurt is low calorie and no fat. I took a bar with me a compared it with the large yogurt. I can actually have a non-fat yogurt and stay on my diet. I realized that this is not only a diet but it is changing the way I eat to a better healthier way of eating. I am very happy right now. I actually am going down to the beach to walk. I love living so close to the beach and to walk along enjoying life so much. It still amazes me where I was such a short time ago in my life and where I am now. Life is good.
8-6-6 8th day on Optifast. Another good day. I did my 1st day of real exercising. I have a tape called WALK AWAY THE POUNDS. I am very proud of myself, I did the whole mile. At first I thought there is no way I can get thru this tape but I did. I had another restful day after that. NASCAR was on so I was on the couch glued to the TV. Good race. Nice crash at the end and took out one of my favorites Kacey Kahn. I have now made it a point to look in the mirror every time I get dressed. This way I can see my body and remember what I am work towards. Well work week ahead. Goal for this week is to do the tape at least 3 days this week and walk at the beach each night. Reaching for the stars!!!!!!!
8-7-6 9th day on Optifast. Today I had a WOW moment. For months my uniforms were really tight. I was wearing a jacket to hide to tightness around my stomach. Today no jacket needed. It felt so good to look in the mirror and realize I can be comfortable. I was so happy. The girls at work comment how I am looking like I am losing weight. I am so motivated and determined it is scary. I also had a great walk at the beach tonight. I did a mile walk in 23 mins. I kept a really good pace. I still can’t believe how easy this is to stay focus and make sure I eat and exercise each day. I now have a system and can keep track of everything on one paper. Life is good. I am so happy. Now I know there will be bad days but I believe I can handle anything.
8-8-6 10th day on Optifast. Well the day started out really well then this afternoon I got really blue. I get like this sometimes. I am still having a hard time right now pulling myself out of it. I am still excited about all I am doing but I am having one of those days. I also have had a lot of cravings today. I called Rebecca one of my coaches and she tried to come up with ideas. She had two of the other girls in the office also suggesting stuff. The best is to take Crystal Lite and put the powder on ice and crunch on it to act like candy. It actually helped. I like the lemonade flavor. Also my upper legs around my butt are really sore today. I walked a good walk last night and may have overdone it. I am going to take a break today. Well tomorrow I have lab again and an utz on my legs. Weigh in is on Friday. Well goodnight for now. Positive thoughts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
8-9-6 11th day on Optifast. Well it was lab day and I hate lab day. According to the lab tech I have delicate veins. I had to be poked 4 times. One vein blew, two gave nothing, finally I had her do the hand and it gave blood. I know I have to do the lab but I hate it. I had the utz of my legs today and everything looked good. I was really tired and out of it today. My brain and mouth were not working together today. I have an eating schedule and when I don’t eat when I am suppose to I get messed up. I weigh in on Friday. I don’t know if it will be a good week. I have a lot of water weight right now. I am glad that I have to weight in each week. It makes me accountable to someone. That may sound funny but knowing that I have to answer to someone helps me stay focused and on the diet. I know I have said this before but what I am doing takes 100% commitment. This is not easy and not a game. I realize this and it helps me get thru the hard times. The rewards at the end will be wonderful. I already feel so much better. My hair is different. My skin looks good. My clothes are fitting. Each day I wake up and there is something new to think of or see. It is nice.
8-10-6 12th day on Optifast. Today was another blah day. I don’t know why but the blood work knocks the wind out of me. I am weak today. My voice is very scratchy. I have some nice bruises. Look like a drug addict. I hope tomorrow goes well. I weigh in. I don’t feel like I lost any weight. I am doing the shakes and bars, meal and water but I feel very heavy due to water weight. Tomorrow will tell the truth. I had a lot of people ask me if I was ok today and when I told them what I was doing they were very supportive. It is so nice to have support. I was really scared about what people would say about the surgery. No one has been negative. Everyone is very interested in what I am doing, why I am doing it and how the process goes. Well time to go drink a shake. I am freezing one. Hope tomorrow is better than I think.
8-11-6 13th day on Optifast. Well I did a lot better at weigh in today. I lost 4 more lbs. Total of 12 lbs lost in 2 weeks. I do feel better today. The fatigue was bad in the morning but as the day went on I felt better. I will weigh in each Friday but do labs in 2 weeks. The lab work is the worse for me. The bruises are worse today. The sleeves luckily cover the bruises. I feel so positive and happy. I am so focused on this whole program. It is hard but I am learning how to work thru the hard times. It is great to have all the wonderful people in my life that support me. I am truly blessed and loved. It is a great feeling to know what I am doing is not just helping me but others. Well best get more stuff out of the car. I have a lot more trips to get everything from my shopping trip to Target. I stocked up on water and diet Lipton green tea. The green tea is really good. I don’t have to exercise tonight since each trip is 21 stairs up and 21 stairs down. I have noticed it is so much easier to make each trip. I make a few than rest. I have learned that I can’t overdue it. Tomorrow is looking so bright. I am loving life right now.
8-12-6 2weeks on Optifast. Well 2 weeks on the optifast and I finally have a routine. I have a fridge of water, green tea, diet root beer, diet red raspberry rite and optifast products. That is all I have in the fridge with a few lean cuisines in the freezer. If anyone comes over they can have plenty to drink but not eat. I have come up with this wonderful chart to mark off my food, exercise and blood sugars each day. It helps so much. On the weekdays I pack up my bag with 4 16oz water bottles and 2 bars. I have an optifast shake first thing in the morning and when I get home from work. Lunch is whatever I think is good for me. Very sensible meal. I today tried diet root beer with the vanilla shake frozen and it was so gross. I love the fact that I had energy today. The house is clean, laundry is done, and caught up at work. So things are good. I am trying to focus on the positives in my life. I do have negatives but I try to put them behind me and go on. Well tomorrow is my NASCAR road race, so I will be in front of the TV. I will do my tape in the am and walk at the beach tomorrow night. Well life is still good and I am very happy. Goodbye for now.
8-13-6 15th day on Optifast. Well another good day except for a pretty good cut on my finger made by my cat Tigger. I gave him a bath and tried to cut off a fur ball and he didn’t like it. I have to be really careful with cuts so I cleaned it really well and bandage it up. Hopefully once I have the surgery and lose the weight my diabetes will go away and I won’t have to worry about cuts and infections. I have my nutritional appt tomorrow. I am excited and worried about it. I hate looking at what I am eating and doing wrong. I know that it is natural to hate evaluating yourself but I know I have to do it. I actually had to fill out a 3 day eating log. I have been keeping it for a few weeks. I looked back at what I was eating and what I am eating now. It is amazing at the changes I have already made. I still get the cravings for ice cream and salami at times but they are not that bad. I know what I am doing is good and it helps motivate me to eat better. Tomorrow's appt I am sure will help me a lot in this journey I have started. I have to remember no pain no gain. Well I am off to the beach for my walk. Goodbye till tomorrow.
8-14-6 16th day on Optifast. Well another good day and I feel really good. I saw the nutritionist today and learned a little bit. She was not completely aware of the nutrition part of the Lap Banding. I will have my 1st appt with Dr. Takahashi on Monday Aug 21. She will review my chart and decide my surgery and when I will be able to do it. I am very excited about this. I am ready for the next step. I weighed again today and lost 2 more lbs. That is a total of 14lbs. I really am happy with what I am doing. It is really the most important thing I have done in my life. I still know that this won’t be easy or fast. I am learning patience. That is a big thing for me. Well this is it for know. I now have to walk around to get rid of a charliehorse in my leg. It feels so good, NOT! Goodnight for now.
8-15-6 17th day on Optifast. Well today started out with the same charliehorse I had last night. My calf hurts so badly. It is really tight. I ended up calling my sister to get advice on how to help get rid of it. I stretched, rubbed, and drank sports drinks. Finally I went to the phcy and got some herbal med that helped. I also really pushed the water. I was running to the bathroom all day. Not fun since the bathroom on our work floor is being remodeled. I had to go to the 1st floor and walk without killing my leg. I am having a mixed feeling day. I have all these emotions about several things and I can’t get them sorted out today. I know I have to stay focused on the big picture but sometimes it is hard. My Oprah magazine came today. She has on the last page her "What I know for sure". The quote that sticks out is "Every sunrise is like a new page, a chance to receive each day in all its glory. Each day is a wonder." That is a quote I will remember. It is very true. So for now I am ending on that. Tomorrow will be a new day.
8-16-6 18th day on Optifast. Well today I started out feeling really bad and tired. I slept straight thru the night and didn’t wake up till the alarm woke me which is very strange for me. I was in a fog all morning. Finally at lunch I was feeling good. I realize now how amazing it is for me to have come this far in just a short time. I am getting so much support it is amazing. I am really following the diet and doing the exercising. I feel great. Today I did have a set back in the exercising. My calf that had the wonderful charliehorse was really sore. I had to keep running downstairs to use the restroom. The water does a number on my bladder. Running out of the elevator I pulled that muscle in my calf and it really hurt. Now since I rested it and iced it the calf feels better. I will take it easy for a while. I am pushing myself too hard with the workout routine. I have an appt on Friday and if it is not better I will have it cked. Well for now I am just taking everything one day at a time. Emotionally I am all over the place. I have a hard time sometimes keeping the emotions in ck. I just try to focus on something else. Well tomorrow is one day closer to my weigh in. I have been eating and dieting really well so hopefully the weight is coming off. I have to start reading the book for my psych eval on Monday. I plan on reading it this weekend once the work week is over with. I can’t overload my brain. My brain is a little full with everything else right now. I have been looking thru the book so it is not foreign to me. I have to take a 200 question test on Monday based on the book, so I want to be able to concentrate on what is says. Well this is all for now. Goodnight and tomorrow is a new wonderful day.
8-17-6 19th day on Optifast. Well weigh in is tomorrow. I get so worried and nervous the night before. I know I am doing everything right and eating good. I get doubts and then when I get on the scale all is well. I have never wanted something as bad as I want to get my life together. I miss things in my life but right now I can’t have those things in my life. Patience is a virtue. Well I best get to bed. Goodnight.
8-18-6 20th day on Optifast. Well I lost 3 more lbs since my last weigh in a week ago. So that is 15lbs in 3 weeks. I am very happy with my progress. I see the doctor on Monday to see about surgery, I can’t wait. I am not feeling well tonight. I started sneezing this afternoon and now my head is all clogged up. I am going to bed and take Nyquil. Well hopefully I wake up feeling better. Goodnight for now.
8-19-6 3rd week on Optifast. Well I have a wonderful head cold. I am so miserable from the head up. I can’t breathe, have no appetite and very tired. I finally went out tonight and got some orange juice. I know I am to watch what I take in but I have to get myself better. I have 2 appts on Monday for the psych eval and discuss with the doctor about surgery. I have to be better. The funny thing about being sick is from the head down I feel great. I have on some lay around clothes on and they are baggy. My face is so clear beside the red nose from sneezing. I also have a good attitude even though I am sick. I slept a lot today. I had to do laundry tonight but took it easy and carried only small loads up and down the stairs. I am learning to take care of myself and my body. Well I am off to bed and to take Nyquil to knock me out. Goodnight for now.
8-20-6 22nd day on Optifast. Well today was a lazy day for me. I still have my head cold. More congestion now than anything else. I slept a lot. I finished off all the orange juice. Still not much of an appetite. I got some sugar free popsicles that helped me stay hydrated. I saw that a lot of people sucked on them after surgery. I did have to do the rest of the laundry. My bedding was covered in cat hair. The cats are driving me crazy today. They know when I don’t feel good and were all over me and wanting to be petted and loved. I finished reading the book for my psych exam. It is very good. I am going to re-read it. Well best get to bed. I have a long day tomorrow. Goodnight for now.
8-21-6 23rd day on Optifast. Well I had an ok day today. I still have my cold. I still feel bad. I am resting tonight. I had my appts today. The psych eval and test were fine. The psych was very nice. She asked and answered questions I had. The doctor appt was also really good. I will be having the lap banding surgery in 4 to 5 months. I still need to lose the weight and change my lifestyle and get on a longer exercise program. I need to walk longer than 30 minutes. I need to try to get up to 45 minutes when possible. If not possible to do 45 minutes at least walk some. I feel good about all the appts today. I have to focus and concentrate at what is ahead of me. I know I can do it. The lap banding surgery is a surgery that I have to be completely committed to. I have to learn to deal with the ups and downs of adjusting the band, learning to eat different and exercising. Well life will change but for the better. Goodnight for now.
8-22-6 24th day on Optifast. Well tomorrow is a big blood test again. I was going to go exercise tonight but remembered I can’t due to a test they are doing tomorrow. It is a cardiac blood test and exercising 48 to 72 hours beforehand messes it up. I am personally having a few problems. I am trying to work thru them but it is affecting my eating. Sometimes I get hungry, sometimes I am not hungry. I know I just have to get over this hill and I will be better. Not sleeping so well but still have a little bit of the cold. I hope to be ok tomorrow to at least walk at the beach. Tonight my stomach all of a sudden really started hurting. I got really sick and now I am fine. I ate bad last night and I think that did it. Not really bad but my stomach wasn’t use to spicy food. I didn’t feel like anything but Mexican food and I had a burrito and taco. My Mexican food will kill me. So today I stayed on track. No appetite this afternoon but still had my shake and bar to not be hungry later at night or in the morning. I can’t eat till after my blood test. Well I best get to bed. I will be ok just have to get out of the blues. Goodnight for now.
8-23-6 25th day on Optifast. Well blood work went so well today I am shocked. I drank my bottle of water before going in. Had the hot pack on and the draw was so easy. I had her do it in my hand. Of course that hurts really bad but a lot better than being poked over and over again. Today I didn’t have much of an appetite. I didn’t eat that much. Only had one shake, one bar, turkey sandwich, fruit and two cups of coffee, plus a lot of water. I had cravings but the Tenuate helped with that. I really wanted Taco Bell tonight but came home, cleaned the house and did my walking tape. It helped. Well two more days till weigh in. I hope I have lost. Linda at work today noticed how loOse my pants are getting. It felt good for her to say something. It helped boost my sprits. Well tomorrow is another and a new day. I am learning patience and to take it day by day. Goodnight for now.
8-24-6 26th day on Optifast. I had a bad day with cravings. I finally had to go for a walk to get out of the office. The girls had Carl's Jr. and Daphne’s, it smelled so good. I had to leave the office. I had a good walk. I think I am becoming lactose intorlance, I get really sick sometimes after having a shake. I am going to talk to the NP tomorrow about it. Emotionally I am still dealing with a lot of things. I just have to get thru the next week or so. Tomorrow is weigh in. I don’t know if I lost weight. Well that is all for now since it is really late and I should of been asleep 2 hours ago. Goodnight for now.
8-25-6 27th day on Optifast. Well I am down to 311lbs. That is a 1lb weight loss since last Friday. I had a bad eating week. It is hard when your emotions are everywhere and in the past food and shopping were your comforts. I am having a hard time because next Thursday 8-31 would have been my 3 year wedding anniversary. Even though Jason and I were going thru problems last year we still spent it together. This year we are not even talking. Love is not easy to turn off. I was really bad today. I had Olive Garden soup, salad, bread sticks and Alfredo sauce. If I hadn’t of eaten I would of been still crawling out of my skin. I am going to get more in an exercise routine and hopefully make that to comfort me. My friend Ben downstairs will help me with weight training. I do know I will make it thru all the personal stuff, it is just hard. Also yesterday was my PAPA's 11 year anniversary of his death. I was very very close to both him and MAMA and still wish they were here. Also I think I am really homesick. It was June 30th when I was last up there. Well enough for me. Goodnight for me.
8-26-6 28th day on Optifast. Well I must have been really tired because I didn’t wake up till 1pm today. I slept like a log. It was nice. I feel better today. I stayed around the house, cleaned, did laundry, gave the cats a bath, and pampered myself. I didn’t do so well on my diet today. Not really bad but didn’t get all the water down me. I think waking up so late didn’t help. Tomorrow I am back on my diet 100%. I plan on going down to the beach for a while and hangout. Well I had to start on med to bring down my CRP. The CRP is a cardiac lab test that tells the chances of you having a heart attack. Mine was high. My dad's family has heart disease. I wonder if I wasn’t going thru this program when I would have had a heart attack. The med is Pravochol and the nurse practioner will do a lab test in a month to ck if the CRP is down. I also have to get lab this Wed to ck my liver since Pravochol can affect your liver. Well I am feeling a little better. It will just take time. I think I also got overwhelmed with everything going on. It is a lot to take in all at once. Tomorrow is a new day. Goodnight for now.
8-27-6 29th day on Optifast. Well I am feeling so much better. I have made some important decisions and I am going to follow thru with them. I have more garbage to clean out literally. I have to go thru Jason's and mine storage area down in the basement parking area. I first have to get the padlock cut off. Once that is done I will feel better. Also I had a good day replanting my garden on my patio. The cats tried to get up on the table while I was doing it and it was a mess. I had a great long walk about 40 minutes at the beach. Then stopped by the Trader Joe's down by the beach. It is so nice. I got a punch of flowers and made a beautiful arrangement. When things settle down I may look into doing a class on flowers. I am really enjoying the garden and making arrangements. Also I have to get back into my photography. I am glad that I feel better. I am going to focus on me and no one else. I can still love someone but not like what they have done. I am learning that. I have to get my brain back in order so I can focus on the diet. When I get depressed I go off of what I am doing. Well I am off now to watch the Emmy's. Goodnight for now.
8-28-6 30th day on Optifast. Well I had a good diet day. I am getting back on track. I also started doing abs and leg exercises in the morning and evening. I need to flatten that stomach, ha ha!!! I also am making time at work to walk in the morning and afternoon. It gets me out of the office and helps clear my mind. I work in a beautiful large complex so it is a treat. Waterfalls, flowers, trees, grass, bridges, ducks, ponds and streams, very nice and peaceful. I do have something weird going on that scares me. I have some weird bruising on my legs. It is on my left calf and it looks like paw prints from the cats but the weird thing is I don’t remember them on my legs unless they attacked me at night which they sometimes do. They are a bit spoiled and wake me up to feed them around 2 or 3 am. Well I put a call into the office to ck if they want to do more blood work when I go on Wednesday. Well I best get some sleep. I am really mentally and emotionally tired. Goodnight for now.
8-29-6 31st days on Optifast. Well woke up this morning and didn’t even wake up thru the night. That is a miracle. I have sleeping problems. I also woke up with sore abs. The exercises and walking is helping. I also learned how to walk and hold in my stomach at the same time. It hurts and is hard but I am getting the hang of it. Tomorrow I have to go get lab work. Yeh, not! Well this is short I have to get to bed. Goodnight for now. Attitude and emotions are much better.
8-30-6 32nd day on Optifast. Well I had an interesting day. I opened my packet for the sleep study that I am doing on Friday night. It is at a hotel. I got freaked out. I called and spoke with a really nice lady. She reassured me what was going to happen and about the faculty. It is at a hotel in a suite. There are 2 bedrooms. I will be in one and another person in another one. The tech will be outside in the common room. At first I was ready to cancel. Also I did some looking into Slim Fast. It looks so much better than the Optifast. A
8-31-6 33rd day on Optifast. Being that today would have been my 3rd year wedding anniversary the day started out bad but ended good. I barely ate today. I just wasn’t hungry. I do weigh in tomorrow so we will see how I did. I didn’t think I was going to make it thru the day but this afternoon I got in to see my friend's hairstylist. I got one of the best haircuts I have ever had. She cut a
