PhatLadySings
April 18th, 2007
Apr 18, 2007
Here it is, another week has flown by, and I really don't have much to report.
I am wondering if the fatigue I've been having has something to do with blood glucose issues, rather than iron ones. I've been having some rather low blood glucose readings and it is after these readings I've been having the fatigue issues.
Talking with my mother, (a retired RN) she is thinking I've changed the outfit of diabetes to one of hypoglycemia. I've had constant blood readings in the mid-to-low 60's.
I've added starch back to my diet, to help counter act this, and it is helping on some level.
I'm not eating bread, but basically adding things back in like corn meal, whole grains, and multi-grains. I am not wanting to add a lot of starches back in, because I still have over a 100lbs to lose, but I'm wondering how I can counter act this.
I see a Dr. on April 30th (I'm looking for--yet again--another PCP) and I am going to ask for a referral to an endochronologist. My mother believes that this Dr. is one and I'm hoping she is right. I'd like to get to the bottom of my glucose issues.
As far as the low iron issues, I'm not sure what to say there. I'm feeling somewhat better, but wonder if this too is still a problem for me. I'm going to have her check my iron when I'm there and see what the reading is.
I've uploaded a couple of new pictures and I'm beginning to see the weight loss. I wish it were more though. I have a feeling, I'm going to have a ton of lose skin, thus this being the reason that I'm not going to *see* the major changes.
That is all for now...
I am wondering if the fatigue I've been having has something to do with blood glucose issues, rather than iron ones. I've been having some rather low blood glucose readings and it is after these readings I've been having the fatigue issues.
Talking with my mother, (a retired RN) she is thinking I've changed the outfit of diabetes to one of hypoglycemia. I've had constant blood readings in the mid-to-low 60's.
I've added starch back to my diet, to help counter act this, and it is helping on some level.
I'm not eating bread, but basically adding things back in like corn meal, whole grains, and multi-grains. I am not wanting to add a lot of starches back in, because I still have over a 100lbs to lose, but I'm wondering how I can counter act this.
I see a Dr. on April 30th (I'm looking for--yet again--another PCP) and I am going to ask for a referral to an endochronologist. My mother believes that this Dr. is one and I'm hoping she is right. I'd like to get to the bottom of my glucose issues.
As far as the low iron issues, I'm not sure what to say there. I'm feeling somewhat better, but wonder if this too is still a problem for me. I'm going to have her check my iron when I'm there and see what the reading is.
I've uploaded a couple of new pictures and I'm beginning to see the weight loss. I wish it were more though. I have a feeling, I'm going to have a ton of lose skin, thus this being the reason that I'm not going to *see* the major changes.
That is all for now...
April 11th, 2007
Apr 11, 2007
Today was a challenging day for me. I've been having hard core fatigue problems, due to my low iron. I have to force myself to work out at the "Y" and I do mean force! I have been slacking for the last 4-days, as I've not had any exercise since last Friday.
No matter, I did make it today and actually got a good workout in.
I started a new iron today. I am having low iron issues and I went into St. Joes to see if they could advise me on some prescription strength iron I had recieved (from the advice from a friend) from my PCP. Well since I've been given the prescription strength iron, my PCP has since retired and because I didn't take them right away, I didn't notice that on the lable there was not any instructions on how to take this iron.
This led me into the offices of St. Joes bariatric center and they were definitely swamped. I have to admit though, I'm rather confused why they would send the nutritionist out to talk with me, rather than the R.N., P.A., or the doc himself.
I will admit I was a walk in and not one they were expecting at that, so I was willing to talk with Amanda. However, I did not get the answer I was looking for, even after she "looked it up". I also have to admit, I didn't much appreciate her telling me that I was taking my iron the wrong way, since I've been taking it the way I have been instructed. I don't take it with my calcium and never have. Sometimes, I feel like I'm not being heard.
I have given up the idea of taking this prescription strength iron, because I still don't know how to take it.
I did get ahold of my bari-buddy (thank you Miss Vickie) and she told me to try the GNC high-potency-iron. It has a combination of vitamin C and copper for absorbtion. It's a 2 month supply for less than the one month supply at St. Joes bariatric clinic.
I finally made it to my 100lbs weight loss mark! :woohoo: I am officially down 102lbs as of today. I needed to see the number in my favor today, as I've been feeling a little down, yes again, thinking the surgery didn't work for me.
I was seriously thinking I'll need a revision. I know this is crazy, but I could be in that small percentage that the RNY doesn't work for me. There are those who follow the surgery just the way they should and still, no significant weight loss.
It just seems that sometimes my appetitte is more than it should be. I am monitoring it closely.
If I just didn't feel tired so much, life would be better.
I made it to Voc-Rehab today and it looks like I'm going to recieve help in getting back to school. I'm really excited about finishing my degree!
I want to enjoy my summer with camping, fishing, and some other out door activities and then settle into a semester of learning. (several semesters actually)
I can't wait!
No matter, I did make it today and actually got a good workout in.
I started a new iron today. I am having low iron issues and I went into St. Joes to see if they could advise me on some prescription strength iron I had recieved (from the advice from a friend) from my PCP. Well since I've been given the prescription strength iron, my PCP has since retired and because I didn't take them right away, I didn't notice that on the lable there was not any instructions on how to take this iron.
This led me into the offices of St. Joes bariatric center and they were definitely swamped. I have to admit though, I'm rather confused why they would send the nutritionist out to talk with me, rather than the R.N., P.A., or the doc himself.
I will admit I was a walk in and not one they were expecting at that, so I was willing to talk with Amanda. However, I did not get the answer I was looking for, even after she "looked it up". I also have to admit, I didn't much appreciate her telling me that I was taking my iron the wrong way, since I've been taking it the way I have been instructed. I don't take it with my calcium and never have. Sometimes, I feel like I'm not being heard.
I have given up the idea of taking this prescription strength iron, because I still don't know how to take it.
I did get ahold of my bari-buddy (thank you Miss Vickie) and she told me to try the GNC high-potency-iron. It has a combination of vitamin C and copper for absorbtion. It's a 2 month supply for less than the one month supply at St. Joes bariatric clinic.
I finally made it to my 100lbs weight loss mark! :woohoo: I am officially down 102lbs as of today. I needed to see the number in my favor today, as I've been feeling a little down, yes again, thinking the surgery didn't work for me.
I was seriously thinking I'll need a revision. I know this is crazy, but I could be in that small percentage that the RNY doesn't work for me. There are those who follow the surgery just the way they should and still, no significant weight loss.
It just seems that sometimes my appetitte is more than it should be. I am monitoring it closely.
If I just didn't feel tired so much, life would be better.
I made it to Voc-Rehab today and it looks like I'm going to recieve help in getting back to school. I'm really excited about finishing my degree!
I want to enjoy my summer with camping, fishing, and some other out door activities and then settle into a semester of learning. (several semesters actually)
I can't wait!
March 28th, 2007
Mar 28, 2007
Aye, aye, oy! What a week this last week has been. It seems I have a talent for pissing off not just one person, but all in my circle of friends! I was so upset yesterday, I ended up having to take a Klonipin to calm me down, because the stress of the situation had me so tense, physically and mentally.
At my last appointment (6-month anniversary) with Doc Steiner, he made the statement that I needed to get off the computer. If he only could know just how right he is, even though his statement was regarding another issue.
I've spent the last 6 years on the computer, making friends and treating these people I've never met in real life as real life friends. It's difficult to recognize the difference when any part of your social life *is* the computer.
Now that I'm breaking free from being on the computer so much and taking on a different mentality in life, I'm finding these online friends I've had for so long and I might very well be on different paths.
When in the past I would have ran to the kitchen, find any food I could shove down my throat, I found myself just wanting to lay down and close my eyes.
When I woke up, I realized that I had not eaten all day. This is as bad as binging.
Is this a milestone for me--dealing with stess of friendships and life and having to cope with food too?
My mind is swimming. I'm a girl that feels like she's lost her best friends, but struggle with the thought that if they were really my friends, this crap wouldn't be happening. The responsibility isn't mine alone.
The point here I suppose is no matte what's going on in our lives, we've got to remember that food is still something we have to think about.
I forgot that yesterday.
At my last appointment (6-month anniversary) with Doc Steiner, he made the statement that I needed to get off the computer. If he only could know just how right he is, even though his statement was regarding another issue.
I've spent the last 6 years on the computer, making friends and treating these people I've never met in real life as real life friends. It's difficult to recognize the difference when any part of your social life *is* the computer.
Now that I'm breaking free from being on the computer so much and taking on a different mentality in life, I'm finding these online friends I've had for so long and I might very well be on different paths.
When in the past I would have ran to the kitchen, find any food I could shove down my throat, I found myself just wanting to lay down and close my eyes.
When I woke up, I realized that I had not eaten all day. This is as bad as binging.
Is this a milestone for me--dealing with stess of friendships and life and having to cope with food too?
My mind is swimming. I'm a girl that feels like she's lost her best friends, but struggle with the thought that if they were really my friends, this crap wouldn't be happening. The responsibility isn't mine alone.
The point here I suppose is no matte what's going on in our lives, we've got to remember that food is still something we have to think about.
I forgot that yesterday.
Happy Wedding Anniversary!! March 21st, 2007
Mar 22, 2007
I thought I'd post a response to a friend who inquired about how I was doing and encouraging me not to give up. (thank you Miss Vickie!)
I have been feeling a little down about the slow weight loss, (slow in my mind as everyone at the clinic says I'm doing the right speed of it) and somewhat discouraged.
After visiting the clinic for my 6 month post-op check up, I felt much better about my progress and realized it's all apart of the process and the process is going just fine. In other words, I've gotta stop comparing myself to others.
Now without further ado, here's my post to the inquiry:
I am trying not to fret, but sometimes it does get the better of me. I am trying to remember that I can NOT compare myself to others and that we are all individuals.
I am having such a problem with my stomach, because as it grows smaller, it's beginning to hang more downward. I'm seeing this as very unattractive and am finding myself becoming self conscience of it. It's also pulling me forward and I'm beginning to have back pain something fierce.
Doc Steiner told me that I'll need to see the plastic surgeon probably 1yr out, that I'm one of those patients that will need sooner than most. (as I understood him)
Yesterday was mine and Mike's 4th wedding anniversary and we went to the Red Lobster. We ordered what we wanted and I couldn't believe how much food was left on our plates. Before surgery, there wouldn't have been anything left on the table and we'd would have added extra biscuits in the mix,plus an appetizer.
After figuring up the calories and such, I was amazed that we didn't go over the top as much as I anticipated. (a plus---BIG TIME!)
We had a good time and I'm ok with everything. I have to remember that this will work for me and I WILL succeed, because I am doing all that I'm supposed to.
I have been feeling a little down about the slow weight loss, (slow in my mind as everyone at the clinic says I'm doing the right speed of it) and somewhat discouraged.
After visiting the clinic for my 6 month post-op check up, I felt much better about my progress and realized it's all apart of the process and the process is going just fine. In other words, I've gotta stop comparing myself to others.
Now without further ado, here's my post to the inquiry:
I am trying not to fret, but sometimes it does get the better of me. I am trying to remember that I can NOT compare myself to others and that we are all individuals.
I am having such a problem with my stomach, because as it grows smaller, it's beginning to hang more downward. I'm seeing this as very unattractive and am finding myself becoming self conscience of it. It's also pulling me forward and I'm beginning to have back pain something fierce.
Doc Steiner told me that I'll need to see the plastic surgeon probably 1yr out, that I'm one of those patients that will need sooner than most. (as I understood him)
Yesterday was mine and Mike's 4th wedding anniversary and we went to the Red Lobster. We ordered what we wanted and I couldn't believe how much food was left on our plates. Before surgery, there wouldn't have been anything left on the table and we'd would have added extra biscuits in the mix,plus an appetizer.
After figuring up the calories and such, I was amazed that we didn't go over the top as much as I anticipated. (a plus---BIG TIME!)
We had a good time and I'm ok with everything. I have to remember that this will work for me and I WILL succeed, because I am doing all that I'm supposed to.
March 19th, 2007 (6-Month Anniversary!!) :-)
Mar 20, 2007
I noted to Billie when she took me back to the weigh in room, that it was always around my time of the month my appointments seemed scheduled. The sweetheart that she is, asked me if I wanted to weigh or wait.
"I want to weigh!" paniced that I wouldn't get to weigh.
I lost 85lbs since being in their office. I am pleased with this weight loss, of course, but felt a little disappointed that it wasn't more. I did express my concerns to Billie, Amanda, and Doc Steiner that I thought I'd be at least 100lbs lighter by now.
It didn't help that I was having the worse PMS day visiting them, because I ended up breaking down in tears.
Thank God they are all supportive and they quickly reassured me that I am doing fine. I'm relieved to hear it.
I showed Amanda my food journal and how I have changed my diet and she said it looked very good. I did get an appointement to meet up with her and Billie on the 3rd of April to check in to see if there is any wieght loss between now and then. (also to follow up on the diet)
I'm feeling better today, knowing that I'm going to make this tool work for me.
I also realized that I'm going to have to stop comparing myself to everyone else's WLS progress. It's hard to do, but it's a certainty that I must only look at what I'm doing and if I'm doing it correctly.
We're going today for another exercise class and I'm really liking that. Must get ready now...
"I want to weigh!" paniced that I wouldn't get to weigh.
I lost 85lbs since being in their office. I am pleased with this weight loss, of course, but felt a little disappointed that it wasn't more. I did express my concerns to Billie, Amanda, and Doc Steiner that I thought I'd be at least 100lbs lighter by now.
It didn't help that I was having the worse PMS day visiting them, because I ended up breaking down in tears.
Thank God they are all supportive and they quickly reassured me that I am doing fine. I'm relieved to hear it.
I showed Amanda my food journal and how I have changed my diet and she said it looked very good. I did get an appointement to meet up with her and Billie on the 3rd of April to check in to see if there is any wieght loss between now and then. (also to follow up on the diet)
I'm feeling better today, knowing that I'm going to make this tool work for me.
I also realized that I'm going to have to stop comparing myself to everyone else's WLS progress. It's hard to do, but it's a certainty that I must only look at what I'm doing and if I'm doing it correctly.
We're going today for another exercise class and I'm really liking that. Must get ready now...
March 15th, 2007
Mar 15, 2007
I am putting a short story I wrote after my surgery, of my surgery, in this entry today. A poster on the Ky forum was asking if anyone wanted to chicken out before their surgery. I think this is a common feeling amongst us post ops and so I thought I'd put the story here for her to have easier access to read it than searching through my many entries to find it.
I also find it interesting, and yet proper, to place it here as a reminder of that day on my 6 month anniversary.
So ladies and gentlemen, Dee's surgery day story:
Well, it was a sunny, muggy morning. The breeze was real light, but with the window of my car open, it was enough to give me a slight chill.
I kept telling Michael over and over in a high-pitched whiney voice that I was scared. It would come out like, "I'm sceeeeeeeeeeeered!" He would just laugh a small chuckle and tell me it would all work out alright.
His encouragement didn't keep me from going on and on about my fears and he eventually shut me up by putting on my favorite radio station. (This keeps me distracted with singing)
One of my favorite Chicago songs came on, 'I'm So Happy', and not enjoying it once, I put my CD in and just played it all the way to the hospital.
"Michael, what if they mess up my vocal chords more than the last place and I never get to sing again?"
"They're not going to mess your voice up Dee."
"But it's already raspy as though I smoke 20 cartons of cigarettes a day."
"Your voice is fine."
"What if Dr. Steiner perforates my intestine and I wake up in the middle of surgery with the taste of shit in my mouth?"
"Dr. Steiner is not going to perforate your intestine Dee."
"I'm sceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeereed!!"
We arrived at the very busy hospital and parked amazingly easy. He wheeled me in the building all the way back to the surgery waiting room. We checked in and because the room was so narrow, I decided from there I'd walk to wherever I needed to walk.
The 'Today' show was on with that Meredith chick, (how annoying) and she was trying to make blueberry blintzes with Martha Stewart. (Even more annoying) Mmmmmmm....blueberry blintzes.]
Mike and I sat and watch these two bubble brains make these wonderful treats and suddenly I had a craving.
"I want a blwinzzte."
"Baby, you can't eat."
"But, I want one."
"Dee, you can't have one."
"They look really good."
"It's fake food."
"It's not fake."
"You don't really think they're making real food, do you?"
"Yes, see she took a bite."
"She's only going to spit the stuff out when they turn the camera off her."
The waiting room was unbearably crowded and it was my scanning the room that I noticed a young woman working on her computer. I watched her intently, contemplating whether she was waiting for someone in surgery or about to go into surgery herself. She was deeply involved in her work, typing away, when her cell phone rang. She answered it with a girly voice that I have to mimic when saying, "I'm sceeeeeeeered!" It was about this time that Mike too noticed her too and he pointed out to me that St. Joes East has wireless internet service for guests.
"I wonder if that includes the folks in ICU?"
"I'm sure it includes everyone."
"You think they provide the computers?"
"No."
"Why?"
"Because."
"Well what if you don't have a computer?"
"Then you don't need this service."
"That hardly seems fair."
"What's not fair about it?"
"It's just not and quit challenging me!"
"I'm not challenging you."
"Yes you are."
"No, I'm not."
"You are too."
"No, I'm not."
"I want a blueberry blintz!!!"
"You can't have one."
I heard a door open and someone yell, "Deanne Dillllllard!!"
"I want a blueberry blintz."
"Come on Dee, she called your name."
We get up and walk over to the nurse who verifies that I'm DeAnne Dillard.
"Mr. Dillard, when we finish getting her prepped, we will call you back to come sit with her till it's time."
I follow the nurse a short distance down the hall to a narrow door that led to a room full of beds. It was a large room with curtains galore pulled this way and that.
"Do you have to use the bathroom?"
I did, but only replied, "No."
She led me to a vacant bed that had a gown, hat and booties laying on it.
"Would you please undress and put these on?"
"Ok."
I started to undress and as I was trying to tie the gown a nurse's assistant walked in and helped me get the gown tied all the way around. It covered me rather well.
The nurse came in and she started asking me the questions of what I had to eat and when is the last time I ate it. It was your basic what, when, why, how, where, kind of questions.
She took my vitals, which were showing excellent numbers and I asked her if the surgery would be cancelled because I was sick.
"No, you don't have a fever and your lungs sound clear."
"Oh, ok." Damn, I was wanting a cheese blintze!!
Once I was prepped, here came my mother and my hubby.
"Oh you came!" I said to my mother, because I was actually rather surprised to see her so early in the morning. After all, this is her middle of the night.
"Why would you think I wouldn't come?"
Ummmm, because you said you couldn't be around me if I went through with this surgery??!!
"Who knows, but I'm glad your here all the same."
"How are you doing?"
"I'm fine, just a little tired."
"Have they given you anything to relax you?"
"I don't think so, but they're going to or so I've been assured."
The curtain flew back and the nurse came through with a small vial in her hand.
"This is going to relax you."
"Ahh see," my mother said, "We were on the same wave length."
It was only a few minutes after she injected it into my IV that I started feeling the room become as clear as rabbit ears on a television in the middle of a desert with the nearest station hundred of miles away.
"I wonder what kind of music the doc listens to?"
Mike perked up and said, "He's a rock man."
"Oh yeah, I can see him air guitaring with a scalpel in one hand and half of my intestines in the other."
"Now that is something I'd like to see on film!" My mother laughed.
"They probably can film it, but then he'd be good and not show off, you know how these docs are." I said.
I told Mike that Dr. Steiner had said he did his residency in San Francisco and that I pictured him a blues man with a touch of jazz.
"No way!" Mike said.
We took a little bet, but Mike didn't like the wager.
"But I want a cheese blintz!!!"
"Honey, you can't have one."
About this time Dr. Steiner walked into the room and asked me how I was doing.
"I'm doing fine actually, feeling real good."
"Ahhh, I see they've already given you the sedative."
"Yeah, they did."
"Good-good." He turns to my mother and his eyes open wide and he says to her in a comical way, (at least to me) "Oh I see you made it, good-good."
"Yeah, I thought I'd show my support." My mother said.
"By the way DeAnne, I wanted you to know that I read your profile on Obesity Help and I really enjoyed getting to know you."
"Oh really, you read all that stuff?" I asked a little nervously. --Uh-oh, did he notice the stuff about the Kama-Sutra?
"Yeaup, every word."
"Well then answer me something doc..." quickly changing the subject, "...would you settle a bet between my hubby and me?"
"Ok, shoot."
"Are you a blues man or a rock man?"
"What?"
"The music you play in the OR, will it be blues or rock?"
"I'm an 80's man."
"You mean as in Rick Springfield."
"Yeah, I like Rick Springfield actually."
"So you wished you had Jessie's girl?"
"No, that was my best friend."
My mother piped in, "Well I don't know who Jessie or this Rick person is, but it sounds as though that sedative is working very well."
The doc chuckled and said, "Yeah it is." He then excused himself by saying he'll see me shortly in the back.
"I really like him DeAnne." My mother said approvingly.
"Yeah, he's pretty cool."
Mike jumped in with his sentiments and again the curtain flew open with the nurse telling me that it was time.
"Mike, I'm sceeeeeeeeered!"
"You'll be ok."
The little nurse moved me and my huge bed in the back room where they do the cutting and it was crammed with a bunch of blue and green masked people, peering out of doorways from different operating rooms.
I was wheeled into one of them, which had a large table at the end of the bed with a box of metal instruments on it.
Oh God, I hope those are cleaned and not rusted.
Wait, God I hope they're accounted for at the end of the surgery too.
"Ok Mrs. Dillard, I need you to slide from the gurney to the table."
I slid over with what I thought was relative ease when this man in green scrubs walks up to me and says, "I know you." "Where do I know you from?"
Ummm, you probably saw me at the mashed tater wrestling at the titty bar last weekend.
"I don't know."
"What's your name dear?"
"DeAnne Dillard."
"Yes, your name sounds familiar too."
Well what do you know, they assign distraction duty.
"What's your name?" He told me and it didn't sound familiar at all, but I wasn't about to let him know that.
"Oh wow, yes, it does sound familiar." It just so happened it turned out he was my anesthesiologist and his next move was to give me the next stage of sedative.
"This is going to relax you."
"Ok, they gave me something out there too."
"Yeah I know, but my stuff is stronger."
"Oh so you have the better mojo?"
"Yes, exactly."
I looked around the room at the dozen or so people in the room and thought to myself, What will these people think of me if I shouted out that I...change....my.......miiiiiinnnnnnn...
The next thing:
"DeAnne, wake up hon, it's all done."
What you mean it's done, it's actually done?
I was dumbfounded that I actually went through with it.
You idiot, you actually went through with it.
After being wheeled in my room I was bombarded by visitors that in essence, I didn't expect. However, I was glad to have the distractions and the laughter. My brother and Mitch made sure that I had plenty of laughs and I'm pretty grateful for that.
My parents were both there and they too were very surprisingly supportive. In fact, I'm real proud of them. My mom brought me a kittykat pillow with a balloon attached and the pillow is so soft and perfect (it has stitched on it purrrrrfect) for my coughing spells.
Mike has been an excellent nurse aid and makes sure that I do all the things I need to. I think that he is enjoying some of the power he has over me right now. Control freak! lol:
The pain is not near as bad as I thought it was and the stitching is healing remarkably well. I really don't expect a lot of scarring. (not that it would matter if it did--full body tuck in a few years)
I'm having a difficult time gaging when I'm full and hungry. I think it's the mental with the hungry, because last night I broke down and started crying because I couldn't have a Freschetta from Wendys. I could actually feel the texture of that sandwich on my lips.
Mike right there, comforting me every step of the way.
And here I am now, thinking I'm hungry and I probably am, because I've yet to eat my breakfast and I've been taking my pills.
I think now I will close and get something to eat. Thank you for reading my story. I hope you all are having a nice Sunday morning.
I also find it interesting, and yet proper, to place it here as a reminder of that day on my 6 month anniversary.
So ladies and gentlemen, Dee's surgery day story:
Well, it was a sunny, muggy morning. The breeze was real light, but with the window of my car open, it was enough to give me a slight chill.
I kept telling Michael over and over in a high-pitched whiney voice that I was scared. It would come out like, "I'm sceeeeeeeeeeeered!" He would just laugh a small chuckle and tell me it would all work out alright.
His encouragement didn't keep me from going on and on about my fears and he eventually shut me up by putting on my favorite radio station. (This keeps me distracted with singing)
One of my favorite Chicago songs came on, 'I'm So Happy', and not enjoying it once, I put my CD in and just played it all the way to the hospital.
"Michael, what if they mess up my vocal chords more than the last place and I never get to sing again?"
"They're not going to mess your voice up Dee."
"But it's already raspy as though I smoke 20 cartons of cigarettes a day."
"Your voice is fine."
"What if Dr. Steiner perforates my intestine and I wake up in the middle of surgery with the taste of shit in my mouth?"
"Dr. Steiner is not going to perforate your intestine Dee."
"I'm sceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeereed!!"
We arrived at the very busy hospital and parked amazingly easy. He wheeled me in the building all the way back to the surgery waiting room. We checked in and because the room was so narrow, I decided from there I'd walk to wherever I needed to walk.
The 'Today' show was on with that Meredith chick, (how annoying) and she was trying to make blueberry blintzes with Martha Stewart. (Even more annoying) Mmmmmmm....blueberry blintzes.]
Mike and I sat and watch these two bubble brains make these wonderful treats and suddenly I had a craving.
"I want a blwinzzte."
"Baby, you can't eat."
"But, I want one."
"Dee, you can't have one."
"They look really good."
"It's fake food."
"It's not fake."
"You don't really think they're making real food, do you?"
"Yes, see she took a bite."
"She's only going to spit the stuff out when they turn the camera off her."
The waiting room was unbearably crowded and it was my scanning the room that I noticed a young woman working on her computer. I watched her intently, contemplating whether she was waiting for someone in surgery or about to go into surgery herself. She was deeply involved in her work, typing away, when her cell phone rang. She answered it with a girly voice that I have to mimic when saying, "I'm sceeeeeeeered!" It was about this time that Mike too noticed her too and he pointed out to me that St. Joes East has wireless internet service for guests.
"I wonder if that includes the folks in ICU?"
"I'm sure it includes everyone."
"You think they provide the computers?"
"No."
"Why?"
"Because."
"Well what if you don't have a computer?"
"Then you don't need this service."
"That hardly seems fair."
"What's not fair about it?"
"It's just not and quit challenging me!"
"I'm not challenging you."
"Yes you are."
"No, I'm not."
"You are too."
"No, I'm not."
"I want a blueberry blintz!!!"
"You can't have one."
I heard a door open and someone yell, "Deanne Dillllllard!!"
"I want a blueberry blintz."
"Come on Dee, she called your name."
We get up and walk over to the nurse who verifies that I'm DeAnne Dillard.
"Mr. Dillard, when we finish getting her prepped, we will call you back to come sit with her till it's time."
I follow the nurse a short distance down the hall to a narrow door that led to a room full of beds. It was a large room with curtains galore pulled this way and that.
"Do you have to use the bathroom?"
I did, but only replied, "No."
She led me to a vacant bed that had a gown, hat and booties laying on it.
"Would you please undress and put these on?"
"Ok."
I started to undress and as I was trying to tie the gown a nurse's assistant walked in and helped me get the gown tied all the way around. It covered me rather well.
The nurse came in and she started asking me the questions of what I had to eat and when is the last time I ate it. It was your basic what, when, why, how, where, kind of questions.
She took my vitals, which were showing excellent numbers and I asked her if the surgery would be cancelled because I was sick.
"No, you don't have a fever and your lungs sound clear."
"Oh, ok." Damn, I was wanting a cheese blintze!!
Once I was prepped, here came my mother and my hubby.
"Oh you came!" I said to my mother, because I was actually rather surprised to see her so early in the morning. After all, this is her middle of the night.
"Why would you think I wouldn't come?"
Ummmm, because you said you couldn't be around me if I went through with this surgery??!!
"Who knows, but I'm glad your here all the same."
"How are you doing?"
"I'm fine, just a little tired."
"Have they given you anything to relax you?"
"I don't think so, but they're going to or so I've been assured."
The curtain flew back and the nurse came through with a small vial in her hand.
"This is going to relax you."
"Ahh see," my mother said, "We were on the same wave length."
It was only a few minutes after she injected it into my IV that I started feeling the room become as clear as rabbit ears on a television in the middle of a desert with the nearest station hundred of miles away.
"I wonder what kind of music the doc listens to?"
Mike perked up and said, "He's a rock man."
"Oh yeah, I can see him air guitaring with a scalpel in one hand and half of my intestines in the other."
"Now that is something I'd like to see on film!" My mother laughed.
"They probably can film it, but then he'd be good and not show off, you know how these docs are." I said.
I told Mike that Dr. Steiner had said he did his residency in San Francisco and that I pictured him a blues man with a touch of jazz.
"No way!" Mike said.
We took a little bet, but Mike didn't like the wager.
"But I want a cheese blintz!!!"
"Honey, you can't have one."
About this time Dr. Steiner walked into the room and asked me how I was doing.
"I'm doing fine actually, feeling real good."
"Ahhh, I see they've already given you the sedative."
"Yeah, they did."
"Good-good." He turns to my mother and his eyes open wide and he says to her in a comical way, (at least to me) "Oh I see you made it, good-good."
"Yeah, I thought I'd show my support." My mother said.
"By the way DeAnne, I wanted you to know that I read your profile on Obesity Help and I really enjoyed getting to know you."
"Oh really, you read all that stuff?" I asked a little nervously. --Uh-oh, did he notice the stuff about the Kama-Sutra?
"Yeaup, every word."
"Well then answer me something doc..." quickly changing the subject, "...would you settle a bet between my hubby and me?"
"Ok, shoot."
"Are you a blues man or a rock man?"
"What?"
"The music you play in the OR, will it be blues or rock?"
"I'm an 80's man."
"You mean as in Rick Springfield."
"Yeah, I like Rick Springfield actually."
"So you wished you had Jessie's girl?"
"No, that was my best friend."
My mother piped in, "Well I don't know who Jessie or this Rick person is, but it sounds as though that sedative is working very well."
The doc chuckled and said, "Yeah it is." He then excused himself by saying he'll see me shortly in the back.
"I really like him DeAnne." My mother said approvingly.
"Yeah, he's pretty cool."
Mike jumped in with his sentiments and again the curtain flew open with the nurse telling me that it was time.
"Mike, I'm sceeeeeeeeered!"
"You'll be ok."
The little nurse moved me and my huge bed in the back room where they do the cutting and it was crammed with a bunch of blue and green masked people, peering out of doorways from different operating rooms.
I was wheeled into one of them, which had a large table at the end of the bed with a box of metal instruments on it.
Oh God, I hope those are cleaned and not rusted.
Wait, God I hope they're accounted for at the end of the surgery too.
"Ok Mrs. Dillard, I need you to slide from the gurney to the table."
I slid over with what I thought was relative ease when this man in green scrubs walks up to me and says, "I know you." "Where do I know you from?"
Ummm, you probably saw me at the mashed tater wrestling at the titty bar last weekend.
"I don't know."
"What's your name dear?"
"DeAnne Dillard."
"Yes, your name sounds familiar too."
Well what do you know, they assign distraction duty.
"What's your name?" He told me and it didn't sound familiar at all, but I wasn't about to let him know that.
"Oh wow, yes, it does sound familiar." It just so happened it turned out he was my anesthesiologist and his next move was to give me the next stage of sedative.
"This is going to relax you."
"Ok, they gave me something out there too."
"Yeah I know, but my stuff is stronger."
"Oh so you have the better mojo?"
"Yes, exactly."
I looked around the room at the dozen or so people in the room and thought to myself, What will these people think of me if I shouted out that I...change....my.......miiiiiinnnnnnn...
The next thing:
"DeAnne, wake up hon, it's all done."
What you mean it's done, it's actually done?
I was dumbfounded that I actually went through with it.
You idiot, you actually went through with it.
After being wheeled in my room I was bombarded by visitors that in essence, I didn't expect. However, I was glad to have the distractions and the laughter. My brother and Mitch made sure that I had plenty of laughs and I'm pretty grateful for that.
My parents were both there and they too were very surprisingly supportive. In fact, I'm real proud of them. My mom brought me a kittykat pillow with a balloon attached and the pillow is so soft and perfect (it has stitched on it purrrrrfect) for my coughing spells.
Mike has been an excellent nurse aid and makes sure that I do all the things I need to. I think that he is enjoying some of the power he has over me right now. Control freak! lol:
The pain is not near as bad as I thought it was and the stitching is healing remarkably well. I really don't expect a lot of scarring. (not that it would matter if it did--full body tuck in a few years)
I'm having a difficult time gaging when I'm full and hungry. I think it's the mental with the hungry, because last night I broke down and started crying because I couldn't have a Freschetta from Wendys. I could actually feel the texture of that sandwich on my lips.
Mike right there, comforting me every step of the way.
And here I am now, thinking I'm hungry and I probably am, because I've yet to eat my breakfast and I've been taking my pills.
I think now I will close and get something to eat. Thank you for reading my story. I hope you all are having a nice Sunday morning.
March 10th, 2007
Mar 10, 2007
Hello eveyone! I just wanted to give everyone an idea of the kind of exercising I'm doing. I've been back into my routine, (even adding some different things, such as working out of the pool and in the main exercise room at the Y) and have worked out doing one routine or another everyday for the last 2 weeks.
Taking St. Joe's exercise and weight training class has helped me tremendously in that it's getting me out of the water and exploring the other areas at the YMCA.
I haven't weighed myself. Mike wont let me. He says that we need to wait until it's time for my actual 6 month appointment. I agree, even though it's so tempting to get on a scale and see if I'm making any progress now that I've started exercising again.
Anyways, here it is:
Monday: 1hr of aqua-robics class
Tuesday: 20 minutes on a bicycle, 4 miles--168 calories burned. This was followed by 15 minutes of stretching and hand weights on an exercise ball.
Wednesday: 25 minutes on a bicycle, 4.5 miles; 10 minutes on the treadmill, 1* incline, .23 miles--242 calories burned. (all together) This was followed by 15 minutes of stretching and hand weights on an exercise ball.
Thursday: 25 minutes on a bicycle, 4.5 miles, (first 5 minutes level 2, 15 minutes increased to level 3, 5 minutes back to level 2, last 5 to level 1) heart rate was maintained through out cardio workout between 145-165bpm. (including treadmill)
10 minutes on the treadmill 1* incline .23 miles. total calories burned: 247. (I don't know why it was different today, other than the fact I did change some settings on the treadmill to a more challenging setting throughout the workout)
Friday: 1hr of aqua-robics class. Mike and I also had our exercise class this afternoon. I did 30 minutes on the bicycle followed by 20 minutes of handweights and she introduced us to the resistance bands. We did some work on those as well.
Saturday: 30 minutes on the bicycle and 20 minutes working with the hand weights and resistance band.
Sunday: 30 minutes on the bicycle and 20 minutes wokring with the hand weights and resisitance band.
Taking St. Joe's exercise and weight training class has helped me tremendously in that it's getting me out of the water and exploring the other areas at the YMCA.
I haven't weighed myself. Mike wont let me. He says that we need to wait until it's time for my actual 6 month appointment. I agree, even though it's so tempting to get on a scale and see if I'm making any progress now that I've started exercising again.
Anyways, here it is:
Monday: 1hr of aqua-robics class
Tuesday: 20 minutes on a bicycle, 4 miles--168 calories burned. This was followed by 15 minutes of stretching and hand weights on an exercise ball.
Wednesday: 25 minutes on a bicycle, 4.5 miles; 10 minutes on the treadmill, 1* incline, .23 miles--242 calories burned. (all together) This was followed by 15 minutes of stretching and hand weights on an exercise ball.
Thursday: 25 minutes on a bicycle, 4.5 miles, (first 5 minutes level 2, 15 minutes increased to level 3, 5 minutes back to level 2, last 5 to level 1) heart rate was maintained through out cardio workout between 145-165bpm. (including treadmill)
10 minutes on the treadmill 1* incline .23 miles. total calories burned: 247. (I don't know why it was different today, other than the fact I did change some settings on the treadmill to a more challenging setting throughout the workout)
Friday: 1hr of aqua-robics class. Mike and I also had our exercise class this afternoon. I did 30 minutes on the bicycle followed by 20 minutes of handweights and she introduced us to the resistance bands. We did some work on those as well.
Saturday: 30 minutes on the bicycle and 20 minutes working with the hand weights and resistance band.
Sunday: 30 minutes on the bicycle and 20 minutes wokring with the hand weights and resisitance band.
March 10th, 2007
Mar 08, 2007
I started the Exercise program that is offered through St. Joe's bariatric program and I'm real glad that Mike and I signed up for it. We are really learning a lot from Heather and it has given great encouragement to use the equipment in the weight room, rather than doing the swim classes alone.
My biggest problem as of yet is deciding which exercise classes I want to do.
My friend from St. Louis sent me an exercise ball through the mail and I bought a DVD to go along with it. I really love this ball and it's turning out to be my best friend. I have only used the DVD once, but we are using the exercise ball in class.
Mike and I have exercised everyday this week, thus far, and intend on exercising in some way for everyday for the rest of our lives. I'm really liking the feeling I get from moving, while I'm moving. It's like an addiction in some sort of way.
Here is what I've done so far this week and what I plan on doing for the rest of the week:
Monday: 1hr of aqua-robics class
Tuesday: 20 minutes on a bicycle, 4 miles--168 calories burned. This was followed by 15 minutes of stretching and hand weights on an exercise ball.
Wednesday: 25 minutes on a bicycle, 4.5 miles; 10 minutes on the treadmill, 1* incline, .23 miles--242 calories burned. (all together) This was followed by 15 minutes of stretching and hand weights on an exercise ball.
Thursday: 25 minutes on a bicycle, 4.5 miles, (first 5 minutes level 2, 15 minutes increased to level 3, 5 minutes back to level 2, last 5 to level 1) heart rate was maintained through out cardio workout between 145-165bpm. (including treadmill)
10 minutes on the treadmill 1* incline .23 miles. total calories burned: 247. (I don't know why it was different today, other than the fact I did change some settings on the treadmill to a more challenging setting throughout the workout)
Friday: I have class again and will be doing Tuesdays workout. I am also considering the aqua-robics class in the morning, because my bro wants to go.
Saturday: 1 hr aqua-robics class.
Sunday: will work the exercise ball routine on the DVD.
My moods have been somewhat up and down some and I'm attributing that to my weight loss, or lack there of, and not being able to get myself out of this rut my weight is in.
Instead of giving into feeling down about it, I decided to do some math and figure out why my body is holding on to 5lbs., with a pound loss here and a pound gained there.
I'm thinking I'm doing to much protein powders, since I'm eating pretty much a well balanced diet with at least 65-80g of protein in my daily value as it is. Adding on the 60-80g of protein powders on top might be too much.
I also figured that I'm eating too much of good foods and not enough low fat type products, such as cheese.
So, today at Krogers I bought new cheeses that are low in fat and gave my brother my bananas and regular cheeses.
Peanut butter is another factor. Mike and I have been eating 2-3TBS of peanut butter a night with our Proto-diet hot chocolate and I'm thinking the peanut butter is high in fat and could be role playing with the extra protein. I've decided to cut the peanut butter out, except for the 2tsp I put in our morning shakes.
Yes, I've decided that I'll continue with one shake a day, but use it as a snack and not a meal per say.
Those are some of the changes we're making and I'm hoping that this will help break the 5lbs stall.
Speaking of which, I have a bitch. (a poet and don't know it)
While I love St. Joes, I'm a little disappointed in something that I should have noticed with them before I had this surgery. And that is their handbook that they give us at pre-op (our "boot" camp) appointment is really for 1-2 months post op patients.
I broke out my book to see if there is something I missed, possibly a menu plan I could follow and I didn't see anything referencing a post op patient of 3-6 months.
I tried calling Amanda, but kept missing her and that added to my frustrations.
I can't help feel that there are some missing links, that as new patients we overlook because of our excitement to have this surgery, that we regret (or at least I do) not noticing before hand.
My appointment is on the 19th of March and I'm going to write down some things that have been bothering me and see how I can resolve these issues so that my surgery does work for me and I for it.
I was so willing to think that my 5lbs. stall is my fault, (huh, no surprise there since we have programmed ourselves to believe that if a diet doesn't work, then it's something *we* did wrong) instead of thinking that it could be something as simple as missing information or a break in the chain of what I'm supposed to do.
In other words, these things can and do happen. We are told that, but I guess it really doesn't sink in until it happens to us personally.
It really does help to have a network of support out there and Mike and I are privileged to have 2 friends (post op) to help answer some questions and bounce ideas off us.
St. Joes has always offered to help us and answer our questions, but, well, that just doesn't always work for one reason or another.
So that is what's going on in the world of my WLS for today. I will update you on my weight loss for my 6 month anniversary.
My biggest problem as of yet is deciding which exercise classes I want to do.
My friend from St. Louis sent me an exercise ball through the mail and I bought a DVD to go along with it. I really love this ball and it's turning out to be my best friend. I have only used the DVD once, but we are using the exercise ball in class.
Mike and I have exercised everyday this week, thus far, and intend on exercising in some way for everyday for the rest of our lives. I'm really liking the feeling I get from moving, while I'm moving. It's like an addiction in some sort of way.
Here is what I've done so far this week and what I plan on doing for the rest of the week:
Monday: 1hr of aqua-robics class
Tuesday: 20 minutes on a bicycle, 4 miles--168 calories burned. This was followed by 15 minutes of stretching and hand weights on an exercise ball.
Wednesday: 25 minutes on a bicycle, 4.5 miles; 10 minutes on the treadmill, 1* incline, .23 miles--242 calories burned. (all together) This was followed by 15 minutes of stretching and hand weights on an exercise ball.
Thursday: 25 minutes on a bicycle, 4.5 miles, (first 5 minutes level 2, 15 minutes increased to level 3, 5 minutes back to level 2, last 5 to level 1) heart rate was maintained through out cardio workout between 145-165bpm. (including treadmill)
10 minutes on the treadmill 1* incline .23 miles. total calories burned: 247. (I don't know why it was different today, other than the fact I did change some settings on the treadmill to a more challenging setting throughout the workout)
Friday: I have class again and will be doing Tuesdays workout. I am also considering the aqua-robics class in the morning, because my bro wants to go.
Saturday: 1 hr aqua-robics class.
Sunday: will work the exercise ball routine on the DVD.
My moods have been somewhat up and down some and I'm attributing that to my weight loss, or lack there of, and not being able to get myself out of this rut my weight is in.
Instead of giving into feeling down about it, I decided to do some math and figure out why my body is holding on to 5lbs., with a pound loss here and a pound gained there.
I'm thinking I'm doing to much protein powders, since I'm eating pretty much a well balanced diet with at least 65-80g of protein in my daily value as it is. Adding on the 60-80g of protein powders on top might be too much.
I also figured that I'm eating too much of good foods and not enough low fat type products, such as cheese.
So, today at Krogers I bought new cheeses that are low in fat and gave my brother my bananas and regular cheeses.
Peanut butter is another factor. Mike and I have been eating 2-3TBS of peanut butter a night with our Proto-diet hot chocolate and I'm thinking the peanut butter is high in fat and could be role playing with the extra protein. I've decided to cut the peanut butter out, except for the 2tsp I put in our morning shakes.
Yes, I've decided that I'll continue with one shake a day, but use it as a snack and not a meal per say.
Those are some of the changes we're making and I'm hoping that this will help break the 5lbs stall.
Speaking of which, I have a bitch. (a poet and don't know it)
While I love St. Joes, I'm a little disappointed in something that I should have noticed with them before I had this surgery. And that is their handbook that they give us at pre-op (our "boot" camp) appointment is really for 1-2 months post op patients.
I broke out my book to see if there is something I missed, possibly a menu plan I could follow and I didn't see anything referencing a post op patient of 3-6 months.
I tried calling Amanda, but kept missing her and that added to my frustrations.
I can't help feel that there are some missing links, that as new patients we overlook because of our excitement to have this surgery, that we regret (or at least I do) not noticing before hand.
My appointment is on the 19th of March and I'm going to write down some things that have been bothering me and see how I can resolve these issues so that my surgery does work for me and I for it.
I was so willing to think that my 5lbs. stall is my fault, (huh, no surprise there since we have programmed ourselves to believe that if a diet doesn't work, then it's something *we* did wrong) instead of thinking that it could be something as simple as missing information or a break in the chain of what I'm supposed to do.
In other words, these things can and do happen. We are told that, but I guess it really doesn't sink in until it happens to us personally.
It really does help to have a network of support out there and Mike and I are privileged to have 2 friends (post op) to help answer some questions and bounce ideas off us.
St. Joes has always offered to help us and answer our questions, but, well, that just doesn't always work for one reason or another.
So that is what's going on in the world of my WLS for today. I will update you on my weight loss for my 6 month anniversary.
February 24, 2007
Feb 24, 2007
I'm still not able to go swimming. The healing of my wound is taking it's sweet long time to go away and I'm likely going to have it treated with some silver-nitrate. I am feeling rather restless and wanting to get back into my pool routine, because I miss having something to do.
Mike and I are starting our weight lifting class that St. Joe's offers at the YMCA and that is something I'm looking forward to.
The weight loss seems to have slowed down, (way down) and I am even doing this stall, lose, gain, stall, lose thing. It's a little frustrating, because I really would like to reach my century mark before my 6 month surgery anniversary. I am just over 5 months and have about 14 pounds to lose to get there. Can I lose 14 pounds in 3.5 weeks?
I plan on going to the pool on Monday and see if the exercise will kick my metabolism back into gear. Tuesday we start the class and this too should help with this stall, gain, lose thing.
My food intake has been alright, but I am considering maybe some of my food choices too might be stalling out my losing. I have backed off on some foods that I was introducing into my diet, such as banana's, because I didn't consider the carbohydrate content of them. I had been eating as much as 2 a day. Not good.
Here is an example of yesterdays food intake:
Breakfast:
1 protein shake w/a few slices of banana and a teaspoon of PB
1/2 cup of strawberries
1 Dannon SF fit and lite yogurt
Lunch:
scrambled eggs. (2 eggs in a mixture of green and red pepper cuts, a mushroom, cheese, and a slice of ham)
Snack:
1 protein bar
Dinner:
1 South Beach Frozen Entree (I can't finish one of these--I used to be able to eat 2 or 3 of them)
Snack:
1/2 of medium size banana
2TBSP of Peanut Butter
1/2 cup of SF applesauce
1 cup of proti-hot chocolate
This is a total of 65g of protein
Water intake was: 49oz
other liquid: 24oz
I am having some fatigue problems. It seems that anytime I try and have a day, I get overwhelmingly tired. I called a bari-buddy from out of town, (she too had this surgery) and she told me that my symptoms sound anemic.
If I don't feel better by Monday, I'm going to call my doc and see if he can't get me in early for some blood work.
I've upped my iron and I am going to up my vitamin C for better absorption.
I also started sleeping with my CPAP again, because I had stopped using it, thinking that I didn't need it anymore. I've been using it for about a week now, but still feel the body fatigue greatly.
Other than those 2 things, I am doing fine. I get a little concern with my food intake, because I feel hungry on some days. I am not sure what I'm doing to make myself hungry, but I intend to find out.
I am considering a liquid diet for a few days to see if that may help with my weight stall.
Well that's it for now. I will post more later.
Mike and I are starting our weight lifting class that St. Joe's offers at the YMCA and that is something I'm looking forward to.
The weight loss seems to have slowed down, (way down) and I am even doing this stall, lose, gain, stall, lose thing. It's a little frustrating, because I really would like to reach my century mark before my 6 month surgery anniversary. I am just over 5 months and have about 14 pounds to lose to get there. Can I lose 14 pounds in 3.5 weeks?
I plan on going to the pool on Monday and see if the exercise will kick my metabolism back into gear. Tuesday we start the class and this too should help with this stall, gain, lose thing.
My food intake has been alright, but I am considering maybe some of my food choices too might be stalling out my losing. I have backed off on some foods that I was introducing into my diet, such as banana's, because I didn't consider the carbohydrate content of them. I had been eating as much as 2 a day. Not good.
Here is an example of yesterdays food intake:
Breakfast:
1 protein shake w/a few slices of banana and a teaspoon of PB
1/2 cup of strawberries
1 Dannon SF fit and lite yogurt
Lunch:
scrambled eggs. (2 eggs in a mixture of green and red pepper cuts, a mushroom, cheese, and a slice of ham)
Snack:
1 protein bar
Dinner:
1 South Beach Frozen Entree (I can't finish one of these--I used to be able to eat 2 or 3 of them)
Snack:
1/2 of medium size banana
2TBSP of Peanut Butter
1/2 cup of SF applesauce
1 cup of proti-hot chocolate
This is a total of 65g of protein
Water intake was: 49oz
other liquid: 24oz
I am having some fatigue problems. It seems that anytime I try and have a day, I get overwhelmingly tired. I called a bari-buddy from out of town, (she too had this surgery) and she told me that my symptoms sound anemic.
If I don't feel better by Monday, I'm going to call my doc and see if he can't get me in early for some blood work.
I've upped my iron and I am going to up my vitamin C for better absorption.
I also started sleeping with my CPAP again, because I had stopped using it, thinking that I didn't need it anymore. I've been using it for about a week now, but still feel the body fatigue greatly.
Other than those 2 things, I am doing fine. I get a little concern with my food intake, because I feel hungry on some days. I am not sure what I'm doing to make myself hungry, but I intend to find out.
I am considering a liquid diet for a few days to see if that may help with my weight stall.
Well that's it for now. I will post more later.
February 6th, 2007
Feb 05, 2007
It's been awhile since my last post and I am feeling a little disappointed in myself that I've not kept up with my profile better. I do have a valid reason though, but still, I like keeping a journal.
I had an operation that had a complication, (not WLS related) and it's been a very painful experience. It has taken a lot of strength out of me and I'm just now starting to feel better. This is after my surgeon (not my beloved Doc Steiner, but one that specializes in the field of my illness) has put me on a strong regimen of antibiotics to keep me from being put in the hospital.
I'm still in pain, and sometimes get to feeling as though I'll never know a life again without pain.
I just re-read that last sentence and found a chuckle escape my lips as I realize my life has been nothing but physical pain due to my weight. Well, it's getting better, and being the optimist I am, I can't abide to giving up faith. I WILL feel better again!
I'm only 17lbs. from being inducted into the century club here. I think I'll actually be 100lbs. lighter before my 6 month post-op date. I'm doing quite well, even though sometimes I get discouraged and tell myself the weight loss has slowed tremendously (it hasn't really) and that I still look 400+ pounds heavy.
We can be our worst enemies, but we have to hold on the what our bodies are showing us, such as smaller clothes sizes, and feeling the physical limitations that kept us prisoners in the past start to lift their strong hold.
I uploaded another picture in my photo section. It's my first before and after photo and while I still struggle to see the changes, I can admit I see some changes.
Thank you for reading and God bless you all.
Dee
I had an operation that had a complication, (not WLS related) and it's been a very painful experience. It has taken a lot of strength out of me and I'm just now starting to feel better. This is after my surgeon (not my beloved Doc Steiner, but one that specializes in the field of my illness) has put me on a strong regimen of antibiotics to keep me from being put in the hospital.
I'm still in pain, and sometimes get to feeling as though I'll never know a life again without pain.
I just re-read that last sentence and found a chuckle escape my lips as I realize my life has been nothing but physical pain due to my weight. Well, it's getting better, and being the optimist I am, I can't abide to giving up faith. I WILL feel better again!
I'm only 17lbs. from being inducted into the century club here. I think I'll actually be 100lbs. lighter before my 6 month post-op date. I'm doing quite well, even though sometimes I get discouraged and tell myself the weight loss has slowed tremendously (it hasn't really) and that I still look 400+ pounds heavy.
We can be our worst enemies, but we have to hold on the what our bodies are showing us, such as smaller clothes sizes, and feeling the physical limitations that kept us prisoners in the past start to lift their strong hold.
I uploaded another picture in my photo section. It's my first before and after photo and while I still struggle to see the changes, I can admit I see some changes.
Thank you for reading and God bless you all.
Dee
About Me
Louisville, KY
Location
48.5
BMI
Surgery
09/19/2006
Surgery Date
May 29, 2006
Member Since
