The Temple Builder Remodels

Sep 26, 2009

  It would seem the Builder has made some changes to this temple, and I haven't caught up with the design plan as yet.  My head hasn't wrapped around the changes, but I'm trying.  I guess "His thoughts are higher than my thoughts." 

I saw my surgeon yesterday, and she was so concerned and anxious to make this building project go smoothly.  But, thus far still too many unanswered questions for her comfort, or mine.  I still continue with bouts of nausea and feeling just sick all over.  Lots, and lots of reflux....taking many Tums and Mylanta between doses of prescribed Previcid. My heart beats very fast and becomes irregular when I'm feeling 'way sick'.  I am not vomiting at all and therefore put away all those meds.  She recommended I return to my meds for nausea, including the patch until such time as the inability to tolerate food improves more than where I am now.  I was thrilled I could eat some protein and drink the protein drink and thought I was making progress.      She agrees that I've made tremendous progress, but I have not "arrived."  The lack of weight loss is perplexing to her, as well as to me.  The tests all come back with no abnormalities which suggests the problem is not with the surgery, but perhaps the surgery has aggravated an existing problem.  She also reinforces the idea that I eat so few calories that my metabolism has slowed to a crawl.  So here we go off to have the mommetry...a really brutal thing that I'm not looking forward to,  but I'll do if it is necessary.  An appointment with an endocrinologist has been scheduled.  It may be that my history of hypoglycemia is interfering with my progress.  And, finally, after all the tests results are in, and if there are no recommendations as a result, we will go to surgery to repair the exisiting hiatal hernia.  The hernia is very small and it has been thought that it could not interfer.  But, by the rule of omission through the testing process, it may the only thing that explains the symptoms.  I keep dreaming somone will say "bingo!!!"  "I know just how to fix it" and whalaaaa its done. 

And so the journey continues.  There are ups and downs.  Some of the ups.....a size 18/20 instead of 26/28.  A total of 82 pounds gone, 55 of them pre-op.  I can cross my legs --- whoooo hooooo, small but fun victory.  I can fly in an airplane and not use a seat belt extender.  I can walk 1-1/2 miles easily, up and down hill.  I love to shop...oh, dear....not sure that's an up?  My friends have kept me hooked up with the things I need to do, and offered patient and endless support.  Talk about ups!!!  The downs...still struggling with establishing a regular bariatric diet, and having seemingly endless tests, not losing weight similar to others in my community, struggling with depression over the whole thing. 

But, the biggest "up".....my Builder does not give up on this remodel and will continue to shape and mold it to His image.  Whoooo hooooo talk about victory.

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