I'm a failure!

I went to the doctor last week. It hasn't even been 3 years since surgery and I've gained 30 lbs. how is this possible????? I am freaking out. Has this happened to anyone else? What did you do? I feel like such a failure. I'm embarrassed. I'm miserable! Help!!!! 

No you aren't a failure. First of all 30 lbs is nothing compared to what I am sure you lost in the first place. I had my surgery in 2004 and have regained about 50. I am not going to lie I have felt like a complete failure too but realize I still have the power to change this by engaging in true change no matter what it takes.  I am giving myself this as a treat, giving myself permission to love me and do this for me.  Stay strong, you can do it.

 

Donna

I hear the upset, but it does no good to beat yourself up for it! Regain happens, and all we can do is correct what we are doing that isn't working. Have you slipped back into old habits? Are you exercising? How many calories are you eating a day?

All I know to do when I start gaining is to start logging my intake and get rigid about exercising. I also try to avoid white carbs, and I don't have junk in the house and I don't buy it. I go back to the basics of protein drinks, not drinking with meals, measuring my food, all those dreary things that work...

Please see my post on Revision! You are not alone, and prolly not at fault!

This has to be a fake post , right? You mean it's been three years since you've seen a doctor, stepped on a scale, or noticed that your clothes don't fit? you seem super-shocked, like you just woke up 30 pounds heavier. i think you know what to do.

Wow! I didn't get on here for your negative comment. For your information, I haven been to the doctor in almost a year. Yes, I knew by my clothes I was gaining a little weight. Did I expect it to be 30 pounds? No! Do I know what to do? Yes! Actually I do. I came here for support... Also known as help.  Not your negative feedback. But if it makes you feel better to kick people while their down, go ahead. I haven't been making myself feel bad enough... Obviously!

I am so sorry to see that post after you opened up... Please ignore that person.  There struggles will come. I'm with you on regain, I know what to do my problem wasn't the how to its just what I was doing that used to work changed.  And for me 16 in two months so yes it comes on us like a rush in race horse.  You can do this again we can do this. Keep u head up... 

You don't owe anyone any explanations or justifications. You'd be wrong and at fault and no matter what anyhow and it's not worth your energy.

I know how it goes. First your clothes don't fit "right." They fit, but not RIGHT. Then they're a little tight in this spot or that spot. Then they don't fit comfortably anywhere. Maybe they even don't fit at all anymore and you have to go up a size. It feels really bad, but there's this inertia... and it almost feels SO bad you don't want to think about it so you leave the subject alone for a bit until you can tackle it. Maybe you noticed the gain when it was 5-10lbs... and maybe psychologically, you didn't get to the point of tackling the problem until it was 30lbs. This journey is indeed hugely psychological. And you're here now, before the gain was more like 100lbs.

It sucks, but there is no reason at all to keep the weight gain or gain anymore, but it's also not that bad. It's not the end of the world, losing 30lbs is a doable goal. I don't know your metabolism, but it's feasible in 6 months to a year for most people. Some people can do it in even less time. But it probably took you 6 months to a year to gain it. Break the numbers down and a 30lb gain in one year is only about an extra 300 calories a day. It probably wasn't so precisely linear, but we know how easy 300 calories can pile up. A less than healthy dinner in a restaurant plus an alcoholic drink can give you an extra 1,000 calories.

The best solution is dense protein at every meal FIRST and exercise as a lifestyle. You start "dieting" again and it won't do you any good metabolically or long term. And I'm one of those so damaged that I can't do a very low carb diet. I wind up crashing my thyroid, burning muscle and lowering my metabolism and GAINING while very low carb. Not to mention how crappy I feel. I do 50-100g a day of carbs, but if I drop down to 30g as something like the Atkins diet does, I'm done for. I try to get in 120g + of protein.

 

Are you still losing weight consuming the 50-100g carbs a day?

Sure. So long as I don't go over my calories and that's really my carb count. I can lose 1.5lbs a week if I stay on plan. Carb cycling works well for me too. I can eat 30g one day and 100g the next. I really only start feeling bothered by low carb after day 3. So I never go under 50g for more than 2 days in a row. It all averages out but alot of trainers seem to think it's good for metabolism. I tend to calorie cycle naturally and count calories weekly instead of daily. Two days ago I ate 900 calories, but today I had 2200! And I also did long distance hiking today and burned half that.

I know this is a carb fearing community, but not everyone has a body that will make the shift to living well in ketosis. I was miserable for months, and I won't ever try it again. 50-100g is still most certainly low-carb by the way, even though it's not ketogenic. Atkins and the like are considered VERY low carb diets.