Manic frustrated

After surgery my Bipolar II changed and my moods began swinging up rather than down. All my life I've been used to handle down, but now the ups are really getting to me... they are what I think of when the rest of the world thinks of Bipolar; "crazy". I can't sleep away my time or find things to do that can hold my interest. I used to say I would rather be happy than fat... now I feel sad and skinny (only I don't feel skinny). I don't have a good doctor and my major best treatment has been ECT, which I can't afford. I am sad and feel very alone.

You're not alone, but unfortunately the social stigma around mental health issues means people don't like to talk about it.

Thank you for pointing that out, it hadn't occurred to me which is why I wrote about it in an appropriate place in hopes of talking about it.

Elle

I don't know if I can offer any solutions but I can empathize with your situation. I have had plenty of experience with PhDs and MDs who know how to do what the textbooks say but don't really know how to connect. My generally cynical nature wasn't helped when I noticed the pens, mugs, bags, etc., they used had the logos on the very same drugs they were prescribing for me.

I mainly use exercise to burn off my restlessness. If my mind is spinning too fast I put my headphones and start walking until I'm tired. I don't know if I'll ever be really happy but I know I feel better now than I did a year ago when I was over 400lbs. I tell myself that I'll keep at it as long as being alive and healthy outweighs being stuck in my head.

Thanks. I appreciate the support. Lately, coffee has been slowing me down, so I've been indulging. Walking would be much more healthy, better yet if I lived in a warm place! Again, thanks.

Elle

Coffee helps slow you down? I used to drink at least one iced coffee a day and they made me a jittery mess. I don't like cold weather either but I keep reminding myself that moving around more helps me stay warm.

I'm Bipolar I and can say I feel healthy for the first time EVER! After surgery I worked relentlessly to find the right med mix. Now 3.5 years later, I've got it down. I'd attribute my success to finding the right doc (I've been through a few) and not being afraid to talk about your health in detail.

In one day I take: Lamictal 300mg, lithium 1450mg, thyroid pill 175mcg, Symbyax 12/50, Deplan 15mg, Vitamin D 50,000iu,

I'm hypothyroidic, but that is linked to depression, I also have low vitamin D that is also linked to depression. And on a side note, I am anemic from the surgery. I started taking supplements and a lot of the side effects that I was attributing to my meds, have gone away.

Lauren