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A Friend
Co-patientApril 25, 2004
Submitted by Robert L.
Most of the folks that get this procedure done are women. Since I fall into the other category, I'm called on to talk to other men from time to time about the the whole WLS experience from a man's point of view. My support group is
small, so when a newcomer shows up and happens to be a guy, it's a big deal. I became an Angel to a guy named Gary Hicks about 10 months after my operation. He was scheduled to do the WLS and got extremely nervous the day of the operation and cancelled. When he told me about this I told him that was perfectly ok. It's a risky deal and any hesitation or fear should be listened to. Fear is an ok thing if handled responsively, you know? I lost 150 pounds with relitively no complications, but I was still scared, but not enough to stop me from going through with it. I had gotten to the point where the operation was worth the risk of losing my life. Gary hadn't gotten there yet.
After listening to me, and discussing virtually the same fears and worries I had before my operation and the success I had afterwards, Gary decided to go through with it. I kept telling him that if he ever had any second thoughts to listen to them and not be embarrassed by them. Even as they wheel you into sugery and you change your mind, it's ok. Gary went through the operation with some minor complications, and two months later had already lost 50 pounds. We discussed the new wardrobe and how to take advantage of Thrift Stores during the rapid weight loss. We became good friends.
Just two weeks later, on my birthday of all days, Gary died from a heart attack. I wish I could have gone to the funeral, but no one from the family ever called to inform the Support Group what had happened. I can't help but think that perhaps they thought that if Gary had not had the procedure he would still be around today. Maybe. I know he wasn't happy being the way he was, and that WLS, for him, was worth the risk.
If you're contemplating this surgery you must ask yourself this critical and all important question: Is this worth dying for? For me, it was.