Question:
scared of the choice to have surgery..how to over come it?
i know in my heart this is the way to go. i am 31 married almost 14 years and have 3 beautiful children ages 11 months to 8. we are not having any more!! any way food has really run my life always has and if i dont do something about it, it always will. i have been at 235 for a year now. i have not been dieting, just watching what i eat, and nothing. i know what scares me the most is being in the hospital, and the pain after and not really knowing how life will be day to day when i have the surgery, if i have it. i can read and read about what every one felt afet theirs but i know it is different for all. but what about the feeling torn issue, do i just do it, because i know i need it, but then there is the long term health issue...can i deal with the side effects, or will i be one of the lucky ones and not have any! i really would like to go to a support group, but the closest it 8 hours, so that it out. if any one can give info on what they went through please give it... — Rebecca73 (posted on October 2, 2004)
October 2, 2004
Have YOU met a post op down a 100 pounds? If not thats the key to deciding.
See how good they look, hear about their health troubles going away! Take a
postie to dinner! I was like you when trying to decide back almost 4 years
ago. Scared? OH YES! If I could of seen just one glimpse of my post op life
it would of helped so much! On long term health risks? Theres the risk of
having surgery and troubles, but then again theres the risk of remaining
MO, and the high blood pressure, high cholestrol, diabetes, etc etc that
goes along with that:( My health was so bad pre op that loosing the weight
asaved my life. I want to congragulate you for asking great questions, that
helps a lot after surgery so your a big success ( looser ):)
— bob-haller
October 2, 2004
Well, it's hard to say that anyone should do this, but it can certainly be
a blessing/miracle. Many people have had problems both during and after
WLS, but for the overall majority they have been minor (in terms of the
psychological and physical problems associated with remaining morbidly
obese) and manageable. I am about 2 1/2 years out, and barely feel like I
had anything done. My best advice would be to just make sure that you will
be able to receive the post-op care you need, especially right after
surgery. All the best to you!
— rebeccamayhew
October 2, 2004
One more thing I forgot to mention...How tall are you? Are you sure that
at 235lbs. you would even qualify? Unless your relatively short, you may
not be MO enough. Bummer, huh?
— rebeccamayhew
October 2, 2004
I am 34 and a mother of 4 children ages 8, 5, 3, and 6 mo. I had many of
the questions and went through many of the dilemmas that you have. I asked
myself can I lose the weight and keep it off without this surgery? My
answer was no. I then asked myself if I can continue to live and care for
my children at this weight? My answer was again no. So what was my
choice, I had to do something. Am I 100% sure that this is the right
choice for me? No, I have my doubts, but I do know that this is my only
choice, and I have researched it enough to know that it is realitivly safe
and quite efective in not only helping you to loose weight, but to keep it
off. Good luck to you in your decision making, my RNY surgery is on Oct 8.
E-mail me and I will be glad to let you know how I do. Lynn
— gsupton
October 2, 2004
Hi Rebecca,
Reading your post made me think, "Wow - what would it have been like
to have had this surgery so much earlier in life?" I had my BPD/DS
when I was 38 1/2 (2 years ago) - my kids were 5 and 10 at the time, and I
was dying. Of course no one can say, "You gotta do this!" It
has to be your decision. But you are right - it would be REALLY helpful
for you to have a real life post-op or 20 to talk to face to face - or at
least by phone. People who would honestly tell you the pros and cons of
what their post-op lives are. If you ever need to talk - feel free to
email me. I have free long distance, too - so I'd be happy to phone you,
too. Just say the word, okay?
Blessings,
dina
— Dina McBride
October 2, 2004
Rebecca, I understand how you feel. Take your time consider all of your
options. I took over a year from the time I went to a seminar to getting
my surgery date. It is a very personal decision we can only provide
support. My advice is to find someone in your area who you can talk to in
person or over the phone. If you can't find a person on your own, talk to
your surgeon and maybe he can put you in touch with a support group and
they should have someone who has been in your situation and can talk to you
one on one. Just remember, if you have insurance or can finance the
surgery, you can always take your time and BE SURE in your own mind that
this is the best option for you. Hope things go well and what ever
decision you make it's the best thing for you.
— Tomekasmom
October 2, 2004
Hey Girl, I know what you are going through, I have been there myself. Even
though I am still pre-op, I finally had my "moment" that let me
know it was the right decision for me (and no one else). KWIM? You are at
Fort Wainwright, correct? Look around and talk to the surgical staff at
your MTF, I know there are others at your base who are post op, there were
some ladies here at Fort Campbell, KY that are post op that have since
transferred out your way! When you PCS to a different base they still want
you following up with the surgical clinic at your new base so they might be
able to put you in contact with others out there. If the closest support
group is 8 hours, away why not talk with the surgical clinic staff and the
behavioral health staff and see if you can get support to start one at your
MTF. That is what happened here at FTCKY. Our support group meetings were
canceled when the soldiers came home from combat so the behavioral health
folks could concentrate on their needs. So a few of the post-ops got
together and got a group started on their own. One woman (go MOE! We love
you!) in particular did most of the work and worked up the chain of command
until she got a yes, now we meet twice a month in the hospital. HTH!
— MagickalMom
October 2, 2004
Make a list of pros and cons for the surgery. Then you can decides if the
pros out weight the cons and decide what is right for you. You can see my
list on my profile. Good luck what ever you decide.
— catleth
October 4, 2004
Not that your weight is not high but have you truely tried to lose weight
the old fashion way and exercise. This surgery is not a quick fix. There
are positives and negitives about this surgery. This surgery is a DIET
TOOL. Yes the word DIET does not go way with this surgery. You still need
to watch what you eat (no sugar, little carbs, mostly proteins, and a alot
of water!). You can't drink 1/2 hour before you eat, no drink when eating,
and 1/2 wait to 1 hour after you eat.) Exercise is very important. Yes,
you will lose without exercise but it will stall out after time. You have
about 8 months to 1 year to lose the bulk of your weight. Your stomach
will expain in time, this is why you want to devleop good eating habits.
Because you have a family it is important that your husband or partner is
supportive. Yes, you do it for yourself but its important that they
understand what life will be like. Food will become just something to keep
you alive not be your life. Important: Insurance companies will not
approve this surgery unless you have been on a structure diet for several
months and have a history with your doctor trying and failing at weight
loss. They want to know that you have tried your best to lose weight.
Also, it is important to know that insurance companies may not cover skin
removal. Please keep this in mind. They approve the bypass for your
health but the skin removal is considered cosmetic not reconstructive.
Have you check with local hospitals that perform this surgery to see if
they have a support group. How about your church? There may be some people
that have had this surgery. E-mail me.. I will be happy to discuss this
surgery with you. How about a on-line support group. A support group is so
important. It keeps you grounded and if a problem comes up you can always
ask someone. I took me a year to make my decision. I was 329 lbs, I'm 17
months post op and have lost 191 lbs. You will find that everyone is
different. I have had no problems or pain. I have not tossed my cookies
(dumped) yet. Love the new me. When from a size 5x pants to a size 10. I
wear a size small top. I love it but I do struggle with old eating habits.
At this phase I can eat 1/2 cup of food per sitting which is the max for
long term post-ops. An average day should include 6 small meals, no more
than 1/2 cup of food, no drinking during meals, no soda, no drink from a
straw, crushing ALL PILLS, siping 48 oz of water plus protein drinks (64
grams or more of protein a day).Please email if you would like to talk.
Gook luck!
— Linda R.
October 4, 2004
I have to say for me it was a great decision, the health benefits are
amazing. I may be wierd but once I knew I qualified it took me about 2
seconds to decide and as soon as my insurance approved I go scheduled and
had surgery, aprox 3 months from first consult to post op. My insurance
approved very quickly and also paid to have my tummy tucked. I have had and
plan more plastics and will pay for them myself, the extra hours worked to
pay for it are well worth the effort. I always say if it is worth having it
is worth sacrificing for. I won't say it is always easy. but it is worth
the effort. Good luck!
— **willow**
Click Here to Return