Question:
When does this get easier??? How did you make it through the first week??

I had my surgery on Monday--just five days ago--and even though I'm trying to be positive, some of the changes are starting to depress me. So far this week, I've had to listen to my family prepare and eat steak, McDonald's, and other heavenly smelling foods that I can't have...I'm still on the broth/clear liquids only diet for another week. My side hurts like h*ll, it's hard to get out of bed, the drain is sooooo, sooooooo gross, I've yet to have a normal BM (will I ever again?), and I've gone up *two* pant sizes since surgery. It's hard not to be depressed, because I haven't seen any positive changes yet. When do the positives start??!? Does the diet ever get easier? How long was it before you felt 'normal' again??? Do you have any suggestions or advice on how I can make this transition easier on myself?? Thanks!    — Stephanie M. (posted on March 12, 2004)


March 12, 2004
Every day will get better. I went home eating pureed food so I wasn't as desperate for something solid. I'd say that by the end of the 2nd week you should turn the corner. The excess fluids should be out of your body and the pain will begin to subside. It was then that I could finally get myself out of bed by myself. As far as missing the foods you like, I just was so wrapped up in doing the right thing and "healing" in the beginning, that it wasn't even a thought in my mind. You will look back to this time in a few weeks and will not believe how far you have come. Best of luck!!
   — Fixnmyself

March 12, 2004
I usually dont reply to messages, I just read them, but all you said sounded all too familiar to me... I know EXACTLY how you feel..... HEAD HUNGER....I was soo miserable and depressed for about the 1st 2 months really, Imean there were happy times in there, but they were few and far between... I was soooo "hungry" I just wanted to EAT.... I didnt realize though that I could have SF popcicles... if I had, I would have ate them like they were going out of style...when I finally learned that I could eat them, AND they counted as my water intake also... I was in heaven.. now granted, there were times that I wanted a hamburger or something... but for some reason, to be able to CHEW a popcicle.. it was GREAT!!!!!!! I am so sorry you are having problems.... I can say though it WILL get better.... but I know what you are going through and how you feel.. it is terrible, but just know that you are not alone, and it DOES get easier!!!!! I am 13 months out and down 197 pounds... trust me, it is soooo worth it!!!!!!! I am loving life!!!!! Take care!!
   — rebecca J.

March 12, 2004
Hi, I am 5 days out and my big problem is trying to get protein in. I drink my water but nothing taste very good to eat. I just keep telling myself it will get better. I mean look at all these folk that have made it.And also I to gain some pounds it is fluids so don't worry.remember you did this just for you and you are worth it.
   — poppink

March 12, 2004
The only encouragement I can give you is that it does get better. You will mourn the loss of food. Just like mourning a loved one that has passed. I had my surgery in 2002 around Easter time and I remember hearing people talk about the Easter dinners they were cooking and coming home and crying. I remember worrying about family cookouts and even when I went on a cruise knowing I could not "pig out" like I used to. Now, I go too a cookout, eat much less then everyone else and just have a good time being with people and being able to move around with ease, not getting tired and not worrying about people staring at the "fat" girl. I go out to eat and eat what I can slowly, making my small meal last as long as everyone else's meal and then spend the rest of the time socializing. I actually found out one can have fun without overeating. Just realize you have to go through this. It took me a while to say that nothing tastes as good as being thin feels.
   — Lisa N M.

March 12, 2004
I spent my first post-op week in the hosptial...the second week I was doped up on pain meds and so tired that I don't think I really knew what was going on or really cared. I gained 16 lbs during this time which had me in tears, even though I knew it was just from all the fluids pumped into my body. Don't stress of the pant size gains...it will pass and along with it, typically another 30 lbs will go as well. Just focus on knowing that soon you'll be losing rapidly. As far as dealing with others eating around you...sorry to say it...but its going to suck for a while. And unless you make yourself understand that you aren't punishing yourself by NOT eating it, but rewarding yourself in the long run with serious weight loss and better health, you're never going to be able to enjoy meal time. In about 2-4 weeks, you'll start feeling normal again. And then every week after that will be better and better. Make it easier by taking a walk when some one's eating tempting foods. You can't expect your family to change eating habits because you had surgery. Although it would make things easier! LOL! Just remember..NOTHING tastes as good as thin feels! I tell myself that every time my hubby eats ice scream (yes, ice Scream!) or chips.
   — Renee B.

March 12, 2004
Stephanie you poor baby, it will get better I went through all that you wrote. I did have creamed soups like chicken (did not eat the chicken) and potato soup/mashed make it watery with the broths at 10 days out. You will appear larger because of the anesthesia and IV fluids, it took about 6 weeks for the swelling to go away. Don't weigh yourself it will depress you, wait until your post-op check up. My drain was removed before I left the hospital, actually I became quite fond of it - when they removed it they said it would would not hurt and it did not, but it felt like someone took something from me LOL. The positives are happening and each day will be different but better - you just can't tell yet because you are probably afraid like most of us were. Hang in there you won't regret it.
   — Anna M.

March 12, 2004
It will get better! Remember, you just had major surgery and no matter whether it's a gallbladder removal, a hysterectomy or WLS it takes time to heal and feel better. The only advice I can offer is to take one day at a time. ALso, I remember that I had planned little "jobs" to do after I was home from surgery to keep me occupied and keep my mind of food and other things. I did things like clean out the kitchen junk drawer, cleaned out the underwear drawer and so forth. Nothing strenuous, but something to get my focus off the surgery and food for awhile. (By the way, I came home from the hospital with about 15 more pounds than I started out with - my skin felt about 2 sizes too small for about a week and a half.)LIke others said, you are also in mourning, and that will heal, too, with "tincture of time". Take care -
   — koogy

March 13, 2004
Hiya Steph- I'm 15 days postop, and my swelling just started to go away this week. I had my 2 week checkup and I had only lost 8 lbs and I felt so down. However, since then I've dropped around 4 more pounds. I was on IV antiobiotics at home until the same day as my checkup (I developed cellulitis unrelated to the surgery...very weird), and when I was done with the IV's I turned a corner. The commercials on tv are horrible, I wanted to cry watching them all for the food I couldn't have...as I sat there and sucked on my broth. UGH. I felt like walking the day I got home from the hospital, and I did, and that made me feel better...but then the infection kicked in and I sat in a recliner when I wasn't in one of my daily doctor appointments. It was just one sucky time. Now that all my staples, IV's and everything is gone...I'm getting out more, and lemme tell you it has improved my mood 1000%. I was asking the same questions you were. Keep thinking positive, it does get better. Oh...the jeans I wore the day before surgery, I couldn't put on until this week...2 weeks later....I was SO BLOATED.
   — M. Me

March 13, 2004
Hang in there. My hubby just went through this. He was in the hospital for the first week, then sent home on clear liquids for 2 weeks. The drive home was 3 hrs so myself and our son had to eat along the way. Then there was home life for 2 weeks. DH (dear hubby) went through hell. I tried to make stuff that he did not eat preop, but it didn't matter. That and stuff on the go drive through stuff. He went through major head hunger battles and was pretty much a bear to live with for 3 weeks. Now that the staples are out and he has progressed beautifully with is food eating he is pleasent to be around again. Nothing bothers him, and he chews small bites to a pulp so he eats pretty much anything (within reason, no breads, pastas, etc). We are going through my choices of 'last suppers' as I only have 3 more weeks until my surgery, and he has been cheerful and going along and finding something to eat. <P> Once you are back on real food it should get easier. That seemed to be the turning point with DH. <P> as for the BM process. DH started going again the day he was released from the hospital. For the first 2 weeks he had limitted mobility and reach so I helped him clean up. It was not a pretty site or smell. It progressed from mostly wattery to more sloid. Now that he is on food, things have firmed up and decreased greatly in odor. He can also reach himself now so no longer needs assistance. <P> in 4 weeks he has lost 50 pounds. Good luck to you, follow your doctors orders and hang in there.
   — Pookie B.

March 13, 2004
Hi, I was told by a friend that the first month would be depressing and it was. I'm 8 months out now with 92 pounds lost and feel great and you will too soon. I don't know if it's a mental or physical thing in the first month but it does go away once you're losing the weight and feeling better from the surgery. Your energy level will explode and the weight just flies off like magic. It is a wonderful feeling, so enjoy the ride. Each day gets better.
   — kkubinski99

March 13, 2004
Yes, you said it right. It was the worst experience of it all, the first week. Not only did i feel like i was hit by a bus, I was crying because I couldn't put my own slippers on and needed help with everything. And of course my family still had to eat so smelling it was torturous because I couldn't have it, plus I had to cook it! I think about day 6 is when I started to do more on my own and started to feel like things were headed up instead of down. And I cheated, I had thinned mashed potatoes, although I was on a liquid diet, just because I couldn't take it. After I started doing that I was feeling much better. Then after that stupid drain came out, it was all uphill! I'm a little over 13 months out now and I eat what my family is eating and it's great, I just feel normal. I know right now you are thinking you are at your lowest but when you are a year out you'll think back to these days and say what was I worried about? It only gets better, way better than you will have ever envisioned it to be.
   — Dee ,.

March 13, 2004
Hi Steph, we've all felt what your feeling right now, it will pass in time. I know that doesn't sound like a quick fix answer but unfortunately there really aren't any. I gained 5 lbs before I came out of the hospital(which was 7days)I was tired from not sleeping, afraid to eat or drink because I wasn't sure what would happen but with family and friendly support from others I got through it and you will too. I believe that if a person has enough courage to take these measures to help get ones health back, then that same courage and fortitude will get you through these first few hurdles. You're in my prayers and thoughts.... Faith be yours.. Deborah
   — Deborah

March 14, 2004
You explained my first two weeks exactly! I felt exactly the same way! My family eating in front of me just about killed me. I cried so much the first 2 weeks. It does get better trust me! I am now 2 months and 1 week post-op and I feel fantastic! Everything is just about normal again. I am eating just about anything I want in very limited quantities. I didn't make a BM for about 2 weeks after I left the hospital, but I am very normal now. Just hang in there the first 2 weeks are very rough, but after that it is smooth sailing! Once you get that drain out you will feel soooo much better! If you have a recliner chair I would sleep in that, because it is VERY hard to get out of bed. I slept in my recliner for about 3 weeks. Hang in there it does get much easier!! Email anytime if you want to talk!
   — EPprincess29

March 14, 2004
(((((HUGS)))))<br> I understand what you are going through...been there, done that, got the t-shirt!<br> I got angry at my husband because he could eat! I stayed angry at him for a while and was too ashamed of myself to even tell him WHY I was angry at him! Poor guy!<br> About the time I actually understood why I was angry and that I was experiencing "head hunger", I found a psychologist who specializes in eating disorders. He has done wonders <i>with</i> me (as opposed to <i>for</i> me.<br> I did not have the energy boost and "feeling wonderful" experiences that many posters talk about. It took me a couple of months to feel "normal" again, but believe me, when it came, it far exceeded my former "normal". It was well worth the wait.<br> Hang in there, get help if you think you need it. I know a promise of "better in the future" doesn't help much now, but it really does get better. <br> Linda
   — Linda S.




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