Question:
DESPERATE! Please help me....Im gaining too much weight back!

I am 3 years out from Proximal open RNY. I am 5'5 and weighed 301 lbs. pre-op and got down to my lowest of 138 lbs. last summer. I looked great, felt great...and was happy. Shortly after my surgery, I got pregnant and had a baby, everything went well. I didn't gain any weight at all while I was pregnant, and actually continued to lose weight well after I delivered. I have been lucky. I haven't had to count calories or carbs or even watch my sweets. I have been able to eat ANYTHING I want since surgery (just smaller portions of course.) Nothing was really off limits to me. I never really exercised, and the weight still fell off of me. I thought this was a magic pill for me despite all the warnings out there. This last December, I noticed the scales move from 138 to 146 or so. I didn't freak out too bad....and shamefully ignored it actually. My size 4's still fit and I didn't notice it in the mirror. Then in the beginning of Feb, I weiged around 156. Then I freaked out. My clothes were too tight. I felt miserable. I went on Atkins right away and even took some Trimspa...I didn't cheat at all! And after two weeks, I hadn't lost a single pound! I felt horrible. Then to top it all off...I found out I was pregnant again! So, I went off the diet pills and Atkins and decided to eat healthy for the baby. But, the weight just piled on after that. I weighed two weeks ago and the scales said 169! How can this be? I haven't been gorging or anything! It can't be the baby yet...I am only 17 weeks pregnant. I have gained a whopping 30 POUNDS since DECEMBER!!!! I am so upset and ashamed. I refuse to see my friends, go out in public at all, I even cancel my doctor's appointments because I am so embarrassed. No...it is not twins either. At this rate, I will be well over 200 lbs. by delivery! I am already "overweight or obese" again. I feel hopeless...so much so, that I am drinking slim fasts and only eating small salads, and boiled eggs every day. I know that isn't good for the baby...but I am so desperate and so petrified to gain so much weight again. I can understand maybe gaining 5-6 pounds so far in my pregnancy...but this is not right. Please help me. What should I do??? I thought about just trying to maintain what I am currently at...but it seems either I have to lose or gain...nothing in between works. PLEASE don't bash me and tell me I am a bad Mom...I know I am being a little selfish...but I can't seem to stop now that I have started this "diet" Any advice?    — Jane S. (posted on April 19, 2005)

April 19, 2005
I completely understand your frustration. I weighed 278 at age 20. I had my surgery on Feb. 25 2002. Today I got on the scale and weighed 170, I want to cry I notice the difference in the mirrow and in my clothes. I'm drinking my atkins shakes and taking natural diet pills from GNC. I'm so frustrated. I blame it on the stress in my life of going to school and working two jobs. My sister had the same surgery and she was my support system and she just passed on Dec 7, so I feel all alone. Just keep eating healthy for you and your baby avoid lots of carbs and take your vitamins and do cardio. Good Luck!
   — mamita093

April 19, 2005
I forgot to include what I got down to which is 150 those extra 20 pounds crept up on me pretty quickly.
   — mamita093

April 19, 2005
Hi Jane, I can imagine how scared you must feel but you need to regain control and approach this problem logically. First off, you need to go to the doctor and have everything checked out because you can start to gain water weight for other reasons during pregnancy. Your weight gain may not be fat. Secondly, you need to see a good nutritionist who can put you on a regimented, balanced plan of eating that will preserve your babies health and prevent you from gaining excessive weight. I know you can stick to it when you think about what's at stake here. You will have far bigger problems if your baby isn't receiving adequate nutrition. You don't need to gain weight to make that happen though. The exercise is really important. I never understood this until now. Start a gradual walking program or pregnancy work out. Approach this like a health nut not a person with an eating disorder and everything will turn out ok. Try not to panic. You are not a bad mom, your hormones are probably all over the place and you are tired and scared, but you can do this! Good luck to you and don't saddle yourself with shame. Empower yourself with knowledge and you will do great! Love, Sue
   — sueboo

April 19, 2005
Have you lookd at the ingredients in the Slim Fast? Unless they've changed their formula, that stuff is LOADED with sugar. I'd suggest you get the South Beach diet book and start following level 2 of that until the baby is born. It is a good, solid plan that allows a variety of foods and helps us avoid being hungry. It isn't really like a diet at all but a really sensible way of eating that will take the weight off and keep it off. I know that if I was drinking Slim Fast, I'd either be dumping or I'd be gaining. Example: I started drinking a protein drink (which shall remain nameless) because it was really good and said it had no sugar. I didn't check the ingredients carefully until I gained six pounds then I started checking everything. The second ingredient was dextrose.........SUGAR. I quit drinking the stuff and the 6 pounds came right off plus I lost two more. You admitted you weren't following the rules so it sounds like you know how to do this. Get your mechanics checked and if that is all right, get on the pouch rules and you'll be fine. Congrats on the baby and I know you want to do what is best for the baby but for you too.
   — scbabe

April 19, 2005
Hi, I can easily relate to the stress, fear, and embarrassment caused by your weight gain. I am three years plus two months out and I have put on over 20 pounds in the past five months! A total of almost 30 pounds since my lowest weight . And; I haven't even been pregnant! I had expected some bounce back, and quite frankly was okay with those first ten pounds. But this getting ridiculous. It's almost summer again and the clothes that fit me perfectly on a November trip to the Caribbean do not come close to fitting now at all. To be honest with you, I have been reading with more and more frequency about long termers who are experience the same thing and WORSE, and have been completely convinced that over time this surgery can, in fact, be defeated, no matter how good you are for your first year or so. I started at 314 and by the end of year one was down to less than 160. I mean, I was goo-oo-od. But, then I guess I just started to fall into some bad habits and just like the "old" me, was able to get into a pretty strong case of denial. I would love to get myself checked out by my doc, but have found myself without benefits. I think that is a very good start for you though - especially with the baby. Other than that, I have started to PAY ATTENTION again, to what I put in my mouth, when and how often things go into my mouth, and how much I am putting into my mouth. Oh, and I started exercising every day for an hour. Basically? Back to basics. Down 6 pounds in 9 days, only 23 more until I reach "goal"! See? I put myself back into a newbie frame of mind - like coming back to this board daily after a year away. It's working. Good luck to you! Please email me if you just want share your "new journey" with someone in the same boat!
   — PaulaM

April 19, 2005
Jane, exercise is key here. With me I setteled at about 135 and held that for over a year. Without changing a thing I gained 20 lbs in just under three months. I wanted 10 of them, but not the rest. I started restricting my eating, exercising like crazy and still gained. My weight leveled off at about 155-160 and I held that for a couple of months. I scaled back the exercise and quit dieting. No gain. At the end of summer I started walking 30-45 minutes 5x per week. (throughout the day, not all at once)and joined WW. In a couple of weeks I was down to about 145-150. I got lazy again and quit dieting. No gain. So here I sit, just weighed yesterday at 147. I've started exercizing more, walking more, eating better. Here's for hoping I lose down to 140, get lazy, quit and not gain. LOL. Chin up dear, eat healthy, walk walk walk, and after the baby go get checked out. REbecca
   — RebeccaP

April 20, 2005
Dunno nuttin' 'bout birthin' babies here, but I do recognize that pesky old "all-or-nothing" diet mentality when I see it. Those of us who forget the past, and reach for old failed diet traps claiming there's nothing else that can or does work, are doomed to repeat our old mistakes. Not surprisingly we will see the same (old failed) results. <P>But, the all-or-nothing thing is just not true. Choices are greater than that. Consuming dense protein foods, followed by nutritious carbs, and little or no processed sugar (and avoiding liquid calories), plus regular exercise, is pretty much what works for many post-ops. Make adjustments to that as they suit you personally. On the other hand, doing little or no exercise, and eating a little bit of whatever you like (especially sugar, my nemesis), left you apparently learning little or nothing about how to "work" your surgery once the early, relatively easy weight-loss phase ended, which is what the problem is here IMHO.<P>How about seeing a nutritionist who specializes in WLS patients, who can guide you through this challenging period? Given the pregnancy concerns, maybe that'll keep you from falling into the all-or-nothing trap or engaging in funky diet behavior that's gotta make you worry about the pregnancy. There are plenty of healthy options out there, and once the baby's born, you can decide how to arrange those options more conservatively, later on, to achieve weight loss.<P> Healthy weight gain (or loss) shouldn't be confused with unhealthy weight gain (or loss). To be blunt, you're kiddin' yourself if you think Slimfast, salads, and eggs are gonna get and keep your weight off at any point. Why bother with WLS, and the tools it gives you, if you're going to fall into the same old traps that never worked before?
   — Suzy C.

April 20, 2005
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Graduate-OSSG That's the link for the Grad list. Several have successfully delivered healthy, happy babies AND lost their "baby wt". Someone there can guy you to the pregnanacy list and breastfeeding list, as well as help you thru the nutritional parts now.
   — vitalady