Question:
Having a hard time with self image ...

I am smaller now than I have been in 16 years and I still see myself as the really obese person that I was. I am only 5 months out and have lost 75 lbs which is great, but I am still so uncomfortable and feel so big. I started out at 291, I am now at 216 and in a comfortable size 16. I am also afraid that my weight loss will stop; I have been on a plateau for a couple weeks. I also have fears that I'm eating too much; snacking too much, even though my calorie intake is between 700 and 900 daily right now. Does that seem right? I think I'm just paranoid. Any advice would be greatfully appreciated. Thanks, Tammy.    — Tammy P. (posted on March 5, 2004)

March 5, 2004
I think what you are experiencing is totally normal! We're all afraid our losses will stop and get afraid that we're eating too much at one time or another. Please consider using fitday.com to track your intake. Then you'll KNOW when you are taking in too much and don't have to worry/wonder. If you're not sure how much is too much at tis stage, I'd suggest a quick check in with your nutritionist. Regarding the body image. I have/had the same problem. DO you have a full length mirror? If not, get one and place it prominently in your room where you will walk by it and see yourself regularly. This helps a lot. One other thing that helped was playing "Bigger, Smaller or Same" It is definately NOT a poitically correct game. But, it did helm me a lot. Go to a public place with a friend you trust and look at the people walking by. Have your friend tell you if you are bigger smaller or the same as anyone who walks by. Of course- DO IT QUIETLY and don't make a scene. I want to say that I never pointed to anyone, or caused any discomfort or even let them know we were looking. I would never do this to hurt someone else. It is an interesting exercise in understanding your current body size though. Good luck to you!!!
   — LMCLILLY

March 5, 2004
Been there, Tammy. You are doing really well. I was eating 1200 cals by then so I think plateaus are just part of life. You can maybe up your exercise, but the plateau should break on it's own.
   — mrsmyranow

March 5, 2004
Long term post-ops,especially those who have never been a normal size, will tell you that it can take years for your brain to register and accept an accurate image of the new size. Remember the surgery is on the pouch and not the head! I think your calorie intake is good for 5 months and 75 pounds is doing very well. You will experience the occasional plateau but just tough it out, stick to the program, and trust me, you will continue to lose. The slow down in the weight loss comes about after a year of so post-op. Snacking is OK if your snacking on the right things, so if the bad habits are creeping back in, like snacking on the white carbs, try to severely limit or control so that you can maximize your loss during the first year. After you get closer to goal (and your far from it!), go to a mall with a good trusted friend and ask her to show you another body type like yours. You will be amazed, perhaps even shocked to think that you are actually as small as the person they are pointing out! The mirror does lie to us, at least we think it does, but good friends will not. Also, sometimes seeing yourself in a picture helps to get adjusted.
   — Cindy R.

March 7, 2004
Tammy are your being paranoid, but guess what YOU'RE "NORMAL." You will have to re-introduce YOU to YOU now. Perhaps, you did not really know yourself before because your obesity did not allow you to get past seeing your weight. Appreciate the fact that you wanted to change your life by taking control. This does not only apply to your weight but your self image also - I also read about people looking for someone to make them happy, but I believe we are responsible for making ourselves happy, then we can seek someone to share that happiness with. There are a lot of self-help books on the market, but a good therapist is also an option - and remember you have to find one that is benefical to your NEEDS! GOOD LUCK and your caloric intake is actually low (but probably all you can ingest) so I hope it is mostly protein.
   — Anna M.