Question:
Do you know when to stop?

HI! I am 6 months out and 82 pounds lighter. I am 5'8" and i am at 190. Everyone says how skinny that I am getting. That I feel great is a plus too. But the nurse part of me is very concerned for some of the posts here. Some of the people have gotten incredibly skinny almost to the emaciated look. Eating disorders run in differant ways and I wonder that if they are contributing to ones other ways. Everyone is telling me to stop losing pretty soon and even though I have lost 8 sizes I still see the size 24and not the loose fitting size 16 person. I want to hit 150-145 but will I be happy then or want to keep going? Unlike some posts here I still drink milk occasionally, eat the food if I am desperately craving it. Your body needs some form of a sugar for natural insulin.    — michelle M. (posted on January 9, 2001)


January 9, 2001
I am 5'4" and weigh 157 (size 10, some 8). I have people constantly telling me to stop losing weight that I look fine now, but I am not in my "range". I too have seen some who look bad because they have lost too much weight and I don't want to look like that. I really don't have the answer to this one because I was wondering the same thing myself. I too look at myself in the mirror and see the 250 lbs. I was before or the flab hanging every where and know I need to lose more. I plan on just taking one week at a time and when I start to see that gaunt look, to stop losing. Didn't help you out much, maybe someone else has a better answer.
   — Deania W.

January 9, 2001
Hi. I am pre-op, but have wondered alot about this question. Since the smallest I have been in my adult life is an 18, it would probably be a gas to be a lot smaller than that, like an 8 or 10. If that is what's in store for me, great, but what I really want is to be healthy. Contact your PCP and Dietitian for direction on when to increase calories and what amount to go to. If you are getting the correct nutrition (including vites), feel good, and are satisfied with your life, then you are probably ready to stop losing. Do not let other's influence you, only you, your doc, and your dietian know for sure what you need. You might consider some short-term therapy in order to get in touch with the "new you" and to deal with the sabatours that say you're getting too thin. remember, they only see you as the old fat you, until you produce a different picture for them with your attitude, presentation, and joy!
   — Elaine P.

January 9, 2001
I personally don't believe we have a whole lot of control over what weight we end up at after we quit losing. Assuming that you follow your doctor's orders to the best of your ability, your body has to do the rest. You lose quickly at first, then gradually, your digestive system gets better at absorbing nutrients, and your stomach stretches to hold a little more food. Eventually, your weight loss will slow down and stop. In most cases you will be at a reasonable healthy weight at that point. Most people can't really choose the exact weight they want to reach, then go directly there. And, very few people lose so fast that they zoom past their goal weight and straight into malnutrition. For those few people that can't stop losing, they need serious medical care to figure out what is wrong and fix it. So, what I am saying is, you don't really have to know when to stop because your body will probably know when, and if not, your surgeon and primary doctor will be following you and help you.
   — Lynn K.

January 9, 2001
I've been looking at all the photos here for the past seven months and I haven't seen anyone who looks emaciated (ie: Ally McBeal). I think it is very difficult to look at a photo of someone who is normal sized now, and a photo of her as morbidly obese. The difference is so great we think they are skinny now, but actually they may be at normal weight or even still overweight. It is important to look at the "after" photo by itself. I'm only 5'3" and my normal weight should be about 120-125 lbs. I've weighed 114 lbs. in the past and I now weight 290 lbs. I know as I lose weight people will say I'm "skinny" at 150 lbs., because there will have been so much weight-loss, but in actuality, I will still be "overweight" at 150 lbs. I just hope I lose weight until my doctor and I are satisfied. I suppose there's always going to be someone who thinks Ally McBeal's body is what she should aim for, but those people have problems WLS can't help. Just my 2 cents worth!
   — Kristy J.

January 9, 2001
I'm 5'7 and have lost 55 pounds. I now weigh 208. My brother is hounding me that this is enough. I made a committment to WLS to get to 145-150. When I weighed 150 20 years ago, I was going to Pat Walker's Passive exercise Salons and taking diet pills to lose weight. So, no, I'm not ready to stop now. I will be ecstatic to reach 175, but I will be deliriously happy to hit below 150. This surgery was my "final" decision to change my life. It was painful and I know it will change the rest of my life. I didn't do this to be chunky. I did it to be healthy and relatively thin. I have yet to see an emaciated 5'8" woman who weighed 145-150. When you get closer to goal, see your dietician and doctor so they can help you plan your meals for maintenance. Don't bow to peer pressure. Good luck and happy losing!
   — marciejayne

January 9, 2001
Hi, first congrats on your great weight loss. I'm sure you are feeling fantastic these days. I also am getting the "when are you going to stop" comments, like I am deliberately starving myself. I had surgery 8 1/2 months ago and I have lost 110 pounds. 10 pounds ago, my doctor told me to try to stop losing weight, to eat more. It is not as easy as that sounds. But I am 6' tall and I weigh 164. In high school I weighed 150, so I don't think I am "too thin" at all. Even my BMI is only in the "ideal" range. Even my own mother, who was the worst critic of me at my fattest, is telling me to stop losing weight. I just think that the change is so dramatic and so fast, that they are thinking I will continue to lose weight rapidly like I did in the first six months, which of course isn't happening. Plus I look like a completely different person than I did 8 months ago, it has to be something of a shock. They were looking at a round face for years, now they are looking at an angular one. Anyway, I don't know if this helps, but I hope it does.
   — Beth B.

January 9, 2001
Michelle, I too thought that I was losing too much weight. I am 5'3 and went down to 113 pounds from 280. It scared me tremendously but..as michelle Curan said, you DO eventually stop losing and will gain alittle back most likely. I stayed at 113 for about 5 months and am now up to 123 and looking fine. I maintain right around there give or take 5 pounds. It depends on the time of month but, I am stable and feel better with those few extra pounds. Actually, the doc still wants me to gain about 5 more but I am happy where I am weight wise. I DO know that I would look alittle more feminine if I gained those few extra pounds but...it's all in the head. I don't want to be any larger. I "was in a size 2-3 and am now in a size 4-5. That's fine with me. Don't worry, the body seems to adjust but again, there may come a time when it seems you are "too thin". Just remember that it will adjust eventually and yes, there is almost a psychological things about the loss....your mindset says, "just another 5 pounds and I will be perfect"....perfection NEVER happens I don't think because we will always have something in us from before that says, "you are too big" and we still see ourselves that way..at least "some" of us do...it's hard to readjust but I actually happens eventually where you accept who you are now and see the real "thinner" you. Good luck.
   — Barbara H.

January 10, 2001
I am presently going through this same sitiuation. I had surgery 1 year ago and was exactly 100 pounds overweight. I have lost 100 pounds. I have gone from a six 22 to a 6. I weigh 128 pounds. Everyone is very worried that I will continue to lose. I only lost a couple of pounds last month. I have incresed my calories some to see where my maintenance calorie intake will be. I really don't want to lose anymore but am happy at this size. Will we ever be satisfied? Well I doubt it. It's kinda like hairstyles, are we ever satisfied? Nope. I would have to have boob job, butt lift, TT, thigh skin removal. The list can go on. I don't have the money for any of those and really my body isn't that bad. I think some strength training will help alot and that's what I plan to do. My goal was to wear size 10 regardless of what I weighed, well I surpassed that. I used to weigh 130 in high school. The difference is I had more muscle mass then. So, I don't know if I'm finished loosing. I still eat protein first, drink my liquids. I am taking small amounts of sugar now that I'm at goal. I still do low fat and exercise. I take my vitamins daily. I go for my 1 year checkup next week and I'll see what the doc says. My BMI is 22 I think. Off blood pressure meds. I'm happy with my results and hope I stay in this weight range. Lou Ann Open RNY 1/13/00, down 100 pounds, at goal
   — Lou Ann J.

May 11, 2001
Hi, I am almost 6 mos post op and down 95# - 15 # away from my original goal of 140. EVEYONE is all over me about my weight loss, telling me to slow down, eat more, etc. If one more person tells me I am getting too skinny I will throttle them! I am smaller than I've ever been (size 12!) and feel great. I know what is good for me - I am not trying to be a size 4 - just be normal. If your Doctor is happy with your progress and you are happy, don't worry about wehat anyone says
   — Lynn M.

March 5, 2003
I'm just 1 year out and have lost 78 pounds. I too have received my share of well meaning comments about getting too thin. Funny thing is that according to reccommened BMI's I am still 25 pounds too heavy. My solution to those who comment is to joke about the reccomended weight recomendations "Sure wish my insurance carrier would go by your standards and not the AMA standards" usurally they respond with , your kidding when I tell them I'm 25 over recommendations. My most recent "defense" has been that my Dr. would like me to keep going for the last 25 pounds because the average post surgical will after 4 years gain a average of 20 pounds. He says I should use the window now and when that extra 20 creeps back on I'll be where I am now. That also seems to settle them down.
   — Brenda F.

February 19, 2005
Hello I am 5'4" currently weighing a 140 pounds even...I was 280 prior to having WLS. I would rather be 150 pounds (the photo at the top of my profile)because I really liked the ~CURVES~...Lmao! Anyway, I don't complain too much about. I think that weighing 145-150 @ 5'8" is kind of too thin...borderline anorexic. So I would go ther if I were you 160 would be a good weight for your height. Alicia
   — PrettyKitty




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