Question:
over 2 years out and gaining
I had surgery in October of 05. I started at 313lb and as of last August I was down to 197. But since then I have gone back up to 248. Its so crazy. I have has so many stresses in my life. I quit my job in July. In August me and my husband and 2 kids moved 15 hours away from home and I have been a stay at home mom. I also started in January as a full time student. Any advise on what to do to turn this around? I know you will all say watch what I eat and exercise but anything else you can help with will be greatly appreciated....thanks — jengriggs01 (posted on March 12, 2008)
March 12, 2008
GET IN TOUCH WITH YOUR DR,THEY CAN HELP YOU BEST.
LEHIGH
— lehigh
March 12, 2008
Try the 5 day pouch diet. Google it and it will come up. It helped me to
get back on track.
— Carlyn M.
March 12, 2008
Consider seeing a counsellor--- if you are back in college or grad school,
there should be a campus counselling service available to you. It's pretty
obvious that you are eating in response to your stress or sense of
isolation, having someone to talk to will help you avoid the emotional
release you might be seeking from food.
— SteveColarossi
March 12, 2008
The problem with that is that my doctor is now 15 hours away and I also
don't have insurance anymore because my husband's job doesn't offer it and
on one income while i'm in school we can't afford it. I can't even go to
meetings here because you have to be a part of their "program"
— jengriggs01
March 12, 2008
Stay here where all your support is. Pour your heart out, write, and tell
us what you need if there is no other solution. We will be here for you
and just maybe one of us has gone through the same thing you have and can
offer some help. God Bless you and your family and don't give up
"surrender". SherriK
— kinkade
March 13, 2008
I feel your pain! I am 4 yrs out and gained 20. Good news is that we can
decide whether or not we are going to go forward or backward. I heard on
the forum about a 5 day pouch test. I started on Monday and I feel like I
have a fresh start and it is getting me back on track. I wish you the best.
— bariatricdivalatina
March 13, 2008
I would call your original sergeon. It is best that you go once a year to
the original sergeon as that will keep you focused in maintaining your
weight. I notice now that I go even three months that I would slack off,
so I told him I needed the structure of still seeing him once a month
regardless of what he charged, so he gives me the last appointment the same
day we have our support group meetings, and I fine I think about that every
time I want something I should not have. Yes, you have to get back to the
gym and start walking again. Take the kids for a walk. It is good for the
entire family. Best of sucess to you, just don't let things stand in the
way of the most sucessful thing you have accomplished. Weight loss does
make a difference in our lives and we need to stay focused on maintain it,
just like people that go to AA.
— William (Bill) wmil
March 13, 2008
Hi Jennifer, thanks for writing. With respect, when I read your post, I
think of the commercial that says "I want it all, and I want it
now!". The reality is that we cannot. You have to decide what you
want on your plate, and then take responsibility for what is on your plate
(plate of life). Everyone has stress. I am 4 years out, buried my brother
in November and a 21 year old boy we helped raise just 3 weeks ago. Stuff
happens, and sometimes is is just too hard. But I have to make choices,
every day I have to make them, and then be responsible for the decisions I
have made. It is part of being an adult. You do too. I am not saying you
are not an adult, I am saying that as an adult, you are making choices. If
you want to run from being an at home mom, jobless to full time school,
that is a choice. It can be a good choice, but it is no excuse for poor
eating habits and lack of exercise. See, you committed to a changed
lifestyle when you allowed the surgeon to operate. You made this silent
commitment to eat and exercise differently, and now you want to be maybe on
auto pilot? It doesn't happen like that for anyone. Park you car farther
in parking lots so you have to walk more, drink water instead of anything
else except milk, give up junk and eat low cal and good protein. There are
no complicated answers, just commitment to what you already committed to.
It is alright if you choose not to, just don't complain about the
consequences of the decisions you make. They are yours to make, and yours
to reap. By the way, you are worth the effort to have a healthy you, and I
hope you choose that. Take care. Patricia P.
— Patricia P
March 13, 2008
Patricia-thanks so much for the negative unsupportive post, I didn't come
here for that!!! Forget I said anything at all, I will just keep it to
myself because of people like you...thanks.
— jengriggs01
March 13, 2008
I tend to agree with Patricia. She is not being unsupportive at all. She
gives a lot of great advice and is like me. We don't sugar coat life, we
give tough love/the truth. Once you post on here you need to realize there
may be some posts that won't tell you what you want to hear. You should
have had the psych eval and you should have been told over and over again
and or realized this is JUST a tool, it is completely up to us whether we
continue to utilize it or not after our "honeymoon" period. It
is up to you whether you accept it or not. There are no easy way outs, and
it is after all up to you to make the choice to start back exercising and
eating right. We cannot do that for you. You already know what you need
to do, make the choice to go back to eating right and exercising once
again. Good luck, and God bless!
— crystalsno
March 13, 2008
Hang in there sweetie! I am so sorry about the unsupportive support. It
doesn't help me either! I didn't have RNY, I had VSG and I am only 4.5
months out so I am probably not the best to advise, but I am 60 years old
and am wiser than some of the younger folks. Stress is a killer.
Literally. It is bad for your health in general. Work at being happy. It
really is a choice to be happy. Consider life a wonderful exciting
adventure and go for it. Many people swear by the 5-dday pouch test and
exercising makes you happier and healthier. Going to school I know you
probably don't have time to formally exercise, but take the advice about
parking far away at school and walking. Do some exercises as you make
dinner. Do 25 stomach crunches every time you go in the bathroom. Walk
around the house during commercials or walk or run in place. Smile a lot
even when you are by yourself. It will feel stupid, but smiling releases a
harmone that calms you and makes you happy. Don't sit in the dark, light
up the house. Go to sleep the same time evey night and get up at the same
time every day. Shake up your body a little by eating meat for breakfast
and breakfast food for dinner. Don't eat amything after 7:00-not even a
grape. (Start off with 9:00 and work down to 7:00.) Find someone you can
help in some way. It will make you feel worthwhile and special. Mainly
hang in there and know you have friends on this site. ((((Hugs)))) Pat
— pjennjr
March 13, 2008
Best I can tell you is get more active again. If you have small kids take
walks with them, play with them outside if possible, Little kids love to
run and play catch and toss games. If the kids have a swing push them and
move back and forth when they swing. Find a support group online like this
one and access it several times a day or night for encouragement. Chase the
kids around the house. It will help you get exercise in and tire them out
so you can do something for you. Do little spurts of exercise on the floor
including the kids in with whatever you do. No insurance I can relate and
having one income as well all to well familiar. But see if there is other
mothers who would like to walk with strollers if your kids are small as I
said before. I wish you much luck. Try the 5 day pouch test by Kaye Bailey
and that will jump start your losing. Cut out all and any junk, sodas,
white breads and water is very important. Drink 8 ozs every 30 minutes. I
had gained 16 lbs in the last year and...long story..but have started
eating healthy and exercisng as well as walking everyday with my daughters
puppy. He enjoys it and I feel much better that I have goteen back into
doing whats right for me. I want to be healthy and not skinny. I want you
to email me if you want to chat and or just need support anytime.
— mspisces
March 13, 2008
Hi Jennifer, i was reading your post, it really hit home with me because
i,m having the same problem. i had my surgery in august 2003 and lost 160
lbs. but since i have started gaining back some wt. please let me say that
i know that MY problem is that i,m an emotional eater. i eat when i,m
happy,sad,angry, no matter what kind of mood i,m in i feel i need to eat. i
tried the 5 day pouch test and it helped me tremendously, started drinking
lots more water and walking some. anytime i can take the stairs or make
myself walk extra i will. you see i,ve got all these pretty clothes in the
closet that are getting too small. i would have this surgery again in a
heartbeat if i could. the pouch has done exactly what it was designed to
do. my life is filled stress and my way of dealing with it is food. i am 51
yrs old and this is how i,ve always dealt with it. please don,t think i,m
saying this is your situation, but when i read your post i could relate and
i guess i,m just venting. i wish you all the best, i know it,s
disappointing whe n you gain, but do what you feel you need to do and the
best of luck to you.
— pmcconnell3004
March 13, 2008
Patricia Mcconnell
Yes that is me exactly. I am 31 years old and seperated from my husband in
July of 06 and almost got divorced but we ended up getting back together a
year ago (feb 07). That almost killed me. I couldn't eat and was taking
prozac and thats when I was my thinnest. The job I had that I quit in July
07 was so bad that I had to take prozac just to be able to go there every
day. Me and my husband knew that we were going to be moving in August to
KY from MA for a job that he took and I was going to go to school full time
so that I can get a better job, so I quit that job. Our relationship was
going very well and we were in counseling so we though we were all set to
move. I got off my prozac because he didn't want me taking it and said
that since I didn't have the job anymore I didn't need it so I quit. So
now I'm in school fulltime for my first time ever since high school, and do
most everything around the house. I'm now 15 hours away from ALL of my
family and friends and feel pretty lonely. My husband also travels about
20 times a year for work so that makes it even harder because I never get
any relief. If I was near my family I would have never let myself gain
weight because I would not show them that I am failing. My husband tells
me that I'm a failure and basically failed that surgery. I keep telling
myself "ok Monday morning i'm going to get back on track" and I
do it for 1 day, sometimes don't even go a whole day and am back to
snacking all day and drinking soda. So yeah I am majorly STRESSED.
— jengriggs01
March 14, 2008
You posted and said, "I know what you will say, watch what I eat and
exercise..." so I won't say it as you already know it.
It sounds like you need some real support. Your school (and if not school,
your town, or one nearby) most definitely has weight watchers and/or OA and
while neither are specially designed for those who have had WLS, I can't
think of any reason why someone with WLS couldn't go. Even if you don't
like their philosophy, being around like minded people (those who are
attempting to make a positive change in their lives) can be very helpful.
I think that you really should look into getting some counseling as well.
Your school may offer it for free or a reduced cost and if not, they can
help set you up with free or sliding scale counseling.
As far as the snacking and soda, don't buy it!!! If you don't feel that
you can stop yourself from eating it, don't bring it home. If it isn't
healthy for you, then it probably isn't healthy for you husband and kids
either.
Last but not least, avoid carbs and sugar as much as possible. They don't
fill you up (for very long) and tend to make you crave them even more.
Protein, protein, protein... chicken, beef, fish, eggs, cheese, avocados,
nuts, etc. Get rid of all the sugar in your house and replace it with
Splenda. You can make some great low carb desserts w/ splenda (cheesecake,
custad, etc.).
You need to take control of your life instead of letting life control you.
Stress stinks so do what you can to minimize it. Exercise is a great
stress releaser, gives you energy, improves mood, etc.
If you are anything like me, being at home all day makes me want to snack
(well, haha graze is more like it). Get outta the house! Don't know how
old your kids are but if you are at home caring for them, take them out...
the park, library, mall, museum, walk up and down the street, just get out
of the house and away from temptations. If your kids are in school, do
your studying at school or the library.
In the morning, set aside your lunch and several snacks for the day and
stick to it. It's easier to say no to junk food when you've got healthy
stuff easily accessible and available.
Ultimately, there is no easy solution. You just have to grit your teeth
and do it. If it helps, set some goals and reward yourself when you meet
them.
Good luck to you.
— mrsidknee
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