Question:
I will be 8 months post-op on June 2, 2003

I am having a horrible time with my weight loss. I have been under a lot of stress and I just seem to be out of control. I must of ate 15 of those small amos choc chip cookies last nite along with watermelon, and sunflower seeds. That was just last nite I had 3 slices of thin dominos pizza for lunch, and a rice krispy treat fro breakfast, and this was just yesterdays HORRIBLE day. I have gained 5 pounds in 3 days (IM NOT KIDDING). I can pack the pounds on. All I do is cry now, I am on a depression med my pcp put me on that. I know I have read of others who think they are failures, but Im so serious I dont think I am, (I KNOW I AM) why do I do this to myself? Im far from happy. I started at 348 and this am I was 250, I have not lost any weight for 2 months not even a ounce. I know I will never see 200 pounds that was my goal. Im so tired of being fat and ugly. I will not compare myself to others because I know we all are different. I go back to see my surgeon on June 3rd, Im sure he is not going to be happy with my loss (or should I say NO loss) I only see him every 3-4 months now. I want to ask him for a revison, but Im afraid he will not do it. He always says he gave me a tool and I need to use it so he will know im not using it correct. sorry this is so long I could go on and on.    — Schatzie1 (posted on May 28, 2003)

May 27, 2003
You're seeing the wrong docs. You need to find a good psychiatrist to talk to. Even a revision isn't going to help if you continue to eat the way you are. Get out of victim mode and decide right now that you're going to stop feeling sorry for yourself and make a call to get some help today. You need to realize that you can't do this by yourself. That's ok...we're not all superman/woman. So get some help from someone you can TALK to. Good luck and God Bless!
   — Kimberly L.

May 27, 2003
You need help with your eating issues. Therapy might help/ Also try to go back to the basics of this surgery, protein first. I agree with the posters before me, you do not qualify for a revision. But, have you been checked for a staple line disruption?
   — Delores S.

May 27, 2003
It is so easy to go back to the carbs and what I call the "easy foods to eat". I have my days where I reach for a "treat" rather than something nutritious. You had a set back. Put it in the past and start over, call it a learning experience. First, you need a professional to talk to, you can't do this on your own right now. Second, clean out all of the trigger foods out of the house and up your protein. If you fill up on protein, the cravings for the "carbs" will eventually fade. It's tough when you get in this cycle, but remember the hardest step is the first one and then it gets better, day by day. You are doing great on your weight loss, focus on you! Everybody has a period of time that they start moving off track, but it can be fixed. You mentioned a revision, but you need to remember that a person can eat alot more carbs at a sitting than protein, so if you start there, that may help. Do you belong to any support groups? If not check through your Dr. and see what he recommends. You need to set up a support system for yourself. And if you want you can e-mail me and I can be a "buddy" of some sort. This is such a life changing surgery, don't be afraid to ask for help. That's what we are all here for. God Bless!
   — Dana B.

May 28, 2003
Rose, Rather then wasting your money on a psychiatrist, what you need is a good friend to talk to, a cheer leader, one that will listen when you need them, and one to encourage you to go on with yur WLS mission. Hang in there these are just minor speed bumps. I know all about the stressing I have it too, we're only human, girl I'm here if you'd like a friend, and cheer-leader, email me. Many hugs. :)
   — tannedtigress

May 28, 2003
I will be 8 months out June 15. I KNOW it is not easy. You will not fail unless you ALLOW it. From experience I can say that I have lost about 115, Im feeling good, looking WAY better, had to buy a new wardrobe (poor me LOL)ect. I concentrated on these things and really let up on my watchfulness as far as food goes....I started eating like I used to any small amounts. I was eating constantly and all the wrong things. I gave myself a few days to wallow in junk food then said no more. Im seeing a therapit who specializes in eating disorders (for last 6 weeks)and bring less of the junk into the house so I am forced to eat the better foods. Make sure you get all your vits. I found tht I feel really sluggish and kind of bummed out when not eating well and doing the vits. Go to suport group meetings. One thing I have heard, didnt think would happen to me and has is when you lose weight you lose you cushion against the world and find you are forced to deal with things in your life that you were suppressing with food/eating. I KNOW it sounds stupid, I NEVER believed that it would happen to me but IT IS. Maybe you are going through the same thing. Find a good therapist so you can get past it, work through it and get on with your healthy new life. The fear of not losing and regaining is almost paralizing.....Im like you I worry about it all the time. I decided on therapy so I could have help dealing with ALL of it so I wont fail. Good luck
   — cherokey55

May 28, 2003
You don't say what type of depression med, how long you've been on it, or whether you have a history of depression. As a veteran of 10 years+ of depression meds, I can appreciate how awful depression is, and how bad it is to wait for a particular med (or doseage) to work. Not to mention the link between overeating, obesity, and depression in many people (me, for sure). But, when meds work, they help enormously. You may want to consider seeing a psychiatrist to manage your meds. I saw a shrink just for meds, and a social worker, at times, for "talk" therapy to determine if I needed that, too.<P>There is such a strong correlation between obesity and depression is so many people (yes, I know, not all, but quite a few of us). People who haven't been clincally depressed cannot begin to imagine how debilitating it is.<P>Though I haven't been depressed since I decided to have the surgery (over a year ago), and then had it (a year ago), I now *jump* on any habit that I know can lead to a return to clinical depression, for me. (In the past, however, I could never identify for sure why the heck it returned or left, despite my best efforts.) Overeating, and indulging in "bad" foods past a certain amount, or more than a certain frequency, is a sign I could go "there" again. So I don't skip exercise, which helps enormously. I do make sure my protein intake is about the same as my carb intake, gram-wise, every day. Those two changes are the biggest I've made as a post-op, and they seem to help keep depression at bay, so far (big bonus there, in addition to weight loss). But I also notice I tend to eat too much, or too many relatively worthless (junk/high carb) foods, when I'm fatigued, or tired, or stressed (all of which can get wrapped up in depression in the long run). I wonder if I do that to try to generate the energy from food that I can't seem to muster otherwise. It doesn't work, of course, but .... hmmmm.<P>You may be reaching for bad foods for a whole lot of reasons. It's complicated. Try to get somebody professional (sorry to disagree with a previous poster -- but it doesn't sound like cheerleading is nearly enough in this case) to help you work through all angles of it, so you can "work your tool" and your surgery can give you hope again. And perhaps a check on your mechanics is also in order. JMHO, and please hang in there ... you are most definitely not alone in this problem. You might just be one of the few who posts about it so candidly. ;~)
   — Suzy C.

May 28, 2003
Rose, first I must say that the first step to getting on the path of recovery is to admit you have problems, so congrats for admitting you do have a problem and need some help. You are smart not to compare your weight losses, issues and progress to others, however know that you are not alone. I think that you need to sit down and come up with a plan for how you are going to tackle your issues and get back on track. Step 1 - the desire to get back on track. Step 2- see a psychiatrist for medication adjustments and some therapy (like why you eat like you do and how to control it). Step 3- find a support group, attend and make friends with those who are about the same distance out to use as a support system. Lean on them-they will be there for you and no one knows more about what you are going thru than another post-op. Step 4 - EXERCISE. You don't mention if you are doing so. Exercise is such a key for keeping the weight off. AND it has the added benefit of releasing endorphins and seratonin-the feel good chemicals in your body. If you haven't exercised, start slow and work your way up. Start with a 5 minute walk, then 10 minutes, then 15, increase the pace, etc, etc. Step 4- remove trigger foods from the house if you can't control them-start with the cookies, and the pizza. Replace them with protein bars, or a protein shake. I know the cookies taste better, but until you get things under control... What you will find is that with each little step, you will feel better, like you have achieved something, an accomplishment, and you can build upon that. All of this takes work. Don't beat yourself up. You are not a failure-look at this as a stumbling block that you have to work around. Make the committment and start in on it. ONE step at a time! Forget the revision-if you don't turn around the bad habits, no revision in the world will work. Doc is right, it is a tool and we have to learn how to use it correctly. You can do this.
   — Cindy R.

June 3, 2003
Rose E., First off congratulations on your "re-birthday". Guess what? I've been on a plateau for a while myself-all because, I think of some dumb Lay's potato chips! I'm sorry you are having this difficulty. I feel you sister! It's something that you are eating. Eight months out, huh? Well I became nine (9) months out as of today. I'm going to tell you like so many here on this website have told me...don't beat yourself up, sweetie.. maybe 3 thin slices of pizza were a bit much, rice krispy treats, hhmmmm, too much sugar content/carbs for me. Stop it!! Stop it!! That self-defeating talk is NOT allowed (just kidding) I want to encourage you and speak POSITIVE things into your life. You ARE NOT fat and ugly, you are as Beautiful as a spring meadow...You sure you want a revision right now? As a result of what you have been eating? Don't mean to be offensive, but sounds to me like you need the kind of help I'm getting first. Dealing with the "whys" and "whens" of eating. Eating because you are TRULY hungry and NOT experiencing head hunger. The surgery was done on our stomachs as you well know...not our heads so that leaves us with the task of "re-programming" the thought patterns. If you don't get a handle on it now, then having a revision, my dear, won't make too much difference. PLEASE, do yourself a favor first. Talk with a professional therapist of some type. The stress, aaaahhhh, I'm with you on that too. I'm going through the very same thing on my job. I take Serzone 150mg twice per day in the morning and at night before I go to bed. I now have occasional depression/anxiety, but it doesn't linger very long. Try surrounding yourself with others like you (I mean other people that have has WLS like you). Don't pattern yourself after them, but hopefully they too, can encourage you. You have made great progress, girl!! Stop that talk!!I "WOVE" WU and YOU CAN DO THIS, Rose, I know you can. I'm not sure how else I can help, but email me if you'd like to talk. LAP RNY 9/3/02 265/159/115-126 and holding presently for some unknown reason...I will NOT be defeated and neither will YOU!!! Be encouraged! Hadiyah, a.k.a.~~~
   — yourdivaness