Question:
Need Help Dealing with Old Eating Habits!

I'm 12 weeks PO and the past few weeks am struggling with eating too much food. I don't stray into refined carbs or something like that and normally just have extra protein or veggies but it's more than I should be eating. I had some left over veggie casserole (about 97% healthy - just 1 Tblsp sugar, 6 tblsp margarine and 3 tblsp tapiocca for a 4 quart casserole dish) and had some for supper along with some left over ham. I was way more than satisfied as I actually ate 1 ounce more than I should have (5 ounces total) as the casserole tasted so good. So then an hour or so later I have no willpower and eat the remainder of the casserole, about 3/4 c. I had to finish it. I was not content to put it away for another day. Needless to say I am miserable now and may or may not be able to keep it down. It would be really stupid to throw it up, especially since it tasted so good. It won't taste the same on the way out that's for sure. I never had any bulimia problems before surgery and I do not think I do now. I'm trying to keep it down. The problem is the same as before surgery - if it tastes good I have no common sense to stop. I wo — zoedogcbr (posted on April 27, 2003)

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April 27, 2003
Here's the remainder of what I typed. It did not get included for some reason!<hr> I would just eat till it was gone and be miserable for a few hours. Now it's with veggies next it will be pasta etc. and I'll be right back where I was before surgery. I do not understand why I am doing this. Is it just because I am feeling deprived of foods? I mostly eat protein with the occassional veggies or fruit and rarely some carbs. My surgeon's plan does not use protein supplements so I have to get my protein from foods, hence the heavy focus on protein. Otherwise at max. 1/2 cup per meal (3 meals a day) I would never even come close to 50-60 grams of protein. Consequently there isn't much room for veggies and fruit. I know I am ultimately in control of this train but I sure could use some ideas on how to tame this eating behavior I have always had. Part of the problem is that I have had some problems eating the last 6 weeks and have thrown up an awful lot. Not from overeating but from food not sitting well. Dense foods still tend to sit like a lead weight in my pouch and many times will not pass. So I guess when I find something that I like and it stays down I lost all reasoning that I should stop and I need to stop. I guess I'm just looking for any ideas of how I can get this back under control and find a way long term to deal with it. It's definitely a behavior I need to reign in if I am to achieve max weight loss and more importantly maintain the loss long term. Thanks in advance for any help or ideas! Chris
— zoedogcbr

April 27, 2003
Please don't think I'm being trite, but have you ever considered therapy? Sometimes it helps to find the root of the reasons you sabatoge yourself. I wish you great luck!
— [Deactivated Member]

April 27, 2003
I see my counselor about every 3 weeks and fully intend to discuss this with her when I see her this week. This has all arose since my last appointment. I also am treated for depression and have been doing fine for years, although I am certainly down about this situation. I guess I just need to get refocused. I guess by only one person responding I must be the only person who is going through something like this, or at least being honest about it occuring. I find it hard to believe I am alone in this struggle.
— zoedogcbr

April 27, 2003
You sound depressed, angry. I am sure you have heard that our stomachs were operated on but not our brains. Why did you put sugar and tapioca in the casserol. I was just discussing this with a friend. Whatever our setoff foods are, we must treat ourselves like alcoholics. We cannot have a little sugar, or in my case, I have a silly obsession. It is pretzels. I know if I have a couple, I will eventually be eating whole bags. Some believe they are in control because in the begining they are able to eat one cookie. I have been on this board for two years and let me tell you, if your are a sugar addict, this will accelerate to bags of cookies. You are so fortunate. You recognize your symptons now. Keep eating the heavy foods. As long as they sit like lead in your stomach, you will not compulsively eat.
— faybay

April 27, 2003
The casserole was made for the entire family and that's how it's made, but you are right I could have kept some out for myself without those items on it. I guess I was not concerned about dumping from that little bit of sugar and tapioca since I only had about 1/20th or less of the dish. It is a huge recipe. I do want to be able to eat things my family does, in small quantites, without everything having to be specially made. The trigger here wasn't the sugar or carbs but just that it tasted great. There are times I would just love to eat veggies and fruit for a meal and not have to eat mostly protein, but I do not dare if I want to keep my body healthy. The high degree of protein is getting old and if I could have more veggies and fruit and still hit my protein I would feel more normal. If I could tolerate more proteins that would help also. I've been fine up until the last few weeks. I guess this is just one of the not so great times some experience after WLS and I just have to weather it. Thanks for your comments.
— zoedogcbr

April 27, 2003
The dish itself sounded fine. One idea is to immediately throw the leftovers into the freezer, especially if it's the right size for another meal. Then you don't have to feel guilty. And I think talking to the counselor is a good idea. Good luck!
— Diane S.

April 28, 2003
Chris. You are not alone in this. I don't have any answers for you because I am going thru the same thing. The food just taste too good to stop eating it. I see a therapist regularly but I never really talk about eating issues. I usually talk about other things, etc. I've been depressed for many years and take meds for it. Maybe it's time I start talking about my eating habits with her. Also, I have recently joined a support group in my area and hopefully they will have some input. feel free to email me direct if you want to chat and be an online chat/support buddy.
— Peggy D.

April 28, 2003
That casserole sure does sound delicious. Please email me the recipe that you used. I am always looking for something new;eventhough, I have not had surgery yet. I am a recipe nut,I guess that is the same, a habit I must change in another form. But I use artificial sweetner when a recipe calls for sugar. (Not being judgmental). I hope that I can handle this situation, as I know I am a carb/sugar addict. [email protected]
— Diana D.

April 28, 2003
Thanks everyone for your responses. I talked with my counselor today, turns out I had an appointment I did not remember. I guess that's divine intervention as I really needed the support today. We did not come up with any brilliant answers but just discussing it helps. She said that maybe seeing a counselor who specializes in eating disorders might be helpful to try and figure out the triggers or things I can do to help refocus. I'll see her in 2 weeks again and see how I am doing and then make a decision then. I also saw the surgeon today for a follow up and got a total surprise that I lost 15 lbs in 2-1/2 weeks, so I guess I haven't sabotaged things much. He and I talked about the eating issues also and he is less concerned than I am about the quantity I am eating as long as I am getting it in my meals and not grazing all day long, which typically I am not. He undestands that not being able to stop with veggies could snowball into something else but he was encouraging and did not take an opportunity to beat me up but instead tried to be supportive. He said obviously in general I am doing things right. He is very pleased with my weight loss to date - 87 lbs in 3-1/2 months (66 lbs since surgery - 12 weeks PO). I was prepared to have only lost a few lbs or maybe even gained as I just felt like I had gone backwards. One of the things my counselor and I discussed is how there have been a number of things that upheaved my life the last 2 weeks and totally threw me off my routine. When I was focused on my routine I would eat when I should and how much I should etc. But when things were messing up my routine I felt lost and as though I was straying horribly. I said something about overeating on the veggies and afraid I'd stretch my pouch and the surgeon's comment was that you could stretch your pouch to 3 times it's size and still have great weight loss, so he wasn't concerned about that. He also felt good that if I had to over eat it was veggies and not tons of refined carbs. I'm just going to try and get my routine back in place and also try and force myself to drink more fluids, especially when I feel hungry. Then after the water, if I'm still hungry I will feel okay about eating something. I will take the advice of going back to freezing extras so they are not sitting there conveniently waiting to be eaten. I've done this in the past and would prefer not to have to but I guess it's the help I need right now. I need to find things to help me redirect my focus. I feel some better and am going to try and tame this food tiger one hour at a time. I know it will be very hard but I need to do something. Thanks for letting me all of this off my chest and giving me some much needed support.
— zoedogcbr

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