Question:
Is it normal for doubts to pop up several weeks pre-op?

I'm preop, all approved, both medically and insurance-wise. I have done so much research, chose a doctor and hospital I totally trust and a procedure that I feel best fits my personal needs and lifestyle. I've never waivered from my determination that this is the best thing that I could possibly do for myself. Up until the past few days, that is. Since getting my insurance approval, I've started to freak out. I worry that I'm going to regret my decision, wonder if I'll be prepared in time with things I will need at home, wonder if I can handle the pain, wonder if I will HATE the surgery I've felt so sure of, wonder if I'll die on the table or shortly afterwords. These doubts come and go throughout the days. For the most part, I'm lucid enough to feel as confident as ever, but then these thoughts sneak back in. Does this mean my I'm getting signs to back out? I don't want to!! Even in my darkest moments, I don't consider backing out. Why am I torturing myself like this?? Thanks for letting me vent, any thoughts will be greatly appreciated.    — [Anonymous] (posted on October 25, 2001)


October 25, 2001
I think if you didnt have any reservations about this surgery that would be odd. I think every single person has doubts.....but rest assured this will be the best thing you have ever done for yourself. Im 10 weeks today and I have lost 50 lbs. What diet plan can you lose weight so quick and keep it off for good. Of course you do need to keep in ;mind this is a tool not a cure and it will take hard work and determination on your end to lose and keep it off. Not being hungry sure helps. You will do great. All the best!!!
   — Melissa S.

October 25, 2001
I'm 4 months post-op, and I remember feeling the same way. After the excitement of being approved wears off, you start thinking about the what if's. EVERYTHING you're feeling is what I felt. I suggest you go to a support group meeting in your area. The meetings I attended as a pre-op really reassured my decision. Whatever you do, trust in yourself that you've made the right decision for you. And don't let the doubts creep in too much, just keep your eye on the goal! Good luck!
   — Becky H.

October 25, 2001
You are having the same reaction I had. It's okay it is completely normal to feel that way. I was positive I wanted this done until I finally had a date. Then I became scared. At 3 weeks before my date I was so scared that my pcp took me off work until surgery. So what you are feeling is normal and just try to relax. I also made sure the morning of surgery to tell the nurse who was putting in my iv that I really wanted to do this but, I was afraid at the last minute I would say something stupid like I changed my mind. But, that really wasn't really the case. So they gave me something for my nerves and told me not to worry they would still go ahead with it. It's now been 6 weeks and I'm doing really good. Still have bad days but, I think this was the best thing I've ever done for myself. I wish you all the luck in the world and hope for a speedy recovery for you ....debbie
   — deborah D.

October 25, 2001
Welcome to the club. My surgery is 2 weeks from today and I'm in la-la land. I've had all of the thoughts you've had. I've read all of the postings pre-op and post-op. Yesterday, I visited my friend who just had the surgery on Tuesday. She looked great. While I was there, the nurses came in and so did another person we had met at the support group. She had just come from her first month's checkup and had lost 26 pounds. The nurses were commenting on how great she looked compared to what she looked like in the hospital a month before. No regrets there. This "thinking/dreaming" process is only natural. If we didn't think about consequences of the surgery, we wouldn't be normal. Good luck and think of me on November 8th.
   — Dianne K.

October 25, 2001
This 100% normal. I don't know anyone who wasn't plagued by doubts and fears prior to surgery.....any surgery. All you can do is talk to people and stay informed. I was somewhat obsessed with wls while I waited for the "big day". This group was a godsend because I had an opportunity to voice my fears and ask any and all questions in a safe environment. Haning in there...in some ways...this is the worst period because everything is an "unknown" and your imagination runs wild.
   — [Anonymous]

October 25, 2001
I've got six weeks to go, and I too am having second thoughts. I think maybe I am just thinking about it too much. Also I've never been thin, I mean never. In third grade I wore a 36 C bra, if that tells you somehting, so I'm not even sure what to anticipate. You spend all your life wishing to be thin, but then when the opportunity finally comes along, you're scared. Why? I guess we're all scared of change. It's human nature, I really feel that when it omes down to it, I am just afraid of the change that it will bring, even though I know that it will generally be a good change. I know this doesn't help you much, but reading your post helped me to know I was not alone, and that in itself made me feel better! Good luck to you, and me I guess! We just have to have the confidence in ourselves! God bless!
   — Deborah W.

October 25, 2001
Let me be one more person to tell you this is COMPLETELY normal. I too have done my research, never strayed from my decision, I fought 9 months to get approval from my insurance, and then I got it, had my tests, got my date, and then WHAM! I got my doubts.. I think it's a normal cycle, this is major surgery! I agree with the other poster that said it'd be abnormal not to worry... Good luck to you! See you on the other side!
   — Elizabeth D.

October 25, 2001
I remember about a week before my surgery, I suddenly couldn't remember why I wanted to have this surgery. At first when you are getting ready and waiting for insurance approval, the reasons are foremost in your mind. As time goes by while you are waiting for the actually surgery, there is sometimes that lapse in memory. I was panicking because I could not remember WHY I was doing this. I posted this on this board and I received many wonderful suggestions. I made a list of all of the reasons that I wanted to have this surgery and what I would be able to do when I was healthier. I also read and reread my letter that I wrote to the insurance company. So, when I couldn't remember, I would get these out, read them and I would be focused again. Also, spend a lot of time looking at before and after pictures. This was so inspiring. Hope this helps. Shelley
   — Shelley.

October 25, 2001
I am pre-op too, hoping for a Nov. date. I think ANY surgery causes anxiety, for me, just be "put under" scares me. I always think I'll never wake up!! But I was scared when I first was pregnent too, and the C-Sec!!! But everything turned out fine. I've had many surgeries since my baby was born 11 years ago. Each time, I can't sleep the night before (worrying)So I think it is perfectly normal my paper work is being sent in so I too, am getting anxious But I'm sure I'll come thru. I have someone "upstairs" watching over me. Best Wishes
   — Cindee A.




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