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Are you "keeping it real"?

I see this phrase a lot. I have noticed people only use it in negative context. It gives me the impression that if you arent talking about how hard you are struggling, what mistakes youve made, what you regret, who you dislike, what you disagree with, well you must not be "keeping it real".

Well I am "keeping it real" right now and saying that after 18 months of post op life, I couldn't be happier. The struggles weren't that bad, the mistakes were minor, the regrets were nil, and life is great.

I wasnt a chubby pre op. I didnt have a "weight problem" either. I was super morbidly obese, barely able to walk eating 3 - 6000 calories a day and sleeping 14+ hours a day. I was sick almost 24/7 with everything from pain to infections. Being "fat" was not my trouble. I was literally dying. Many people here can relate to this, and many can imagine themselves getting to that point eventually.

Conversly I didnt get RNY to get thin. I got RNY to save my life, literally. My fat was what stood between me and a long, healthy, and happy life. Therefore the fat had to go. 

I had failed at any long term weight loss on my own and took matters into my own hands, via the Internet. I researched weight loss surgery and found someplace I could get it done asap. It took 4 months to get surgery, in that time I gained even more and ballooned even larger. I binged right up until the night before surgery. I ate about 4000 cals in my last meal while I was supposed to be on my liquid diet. As you can see, without the tool of rny I was flailing even at the most "simple" of tasks. All I had to do, on my own, was drink shakes 4 times a day for 14 days. Looking back it seems soooo insignificant, so pathetic, so insane. That was who I was pre op. 

The moment I walked into that hospital a switch was flipped. I felt it immediately. It was a calm, content feeling I dont recall ever having in my life. From that moment on I was ready to take care of me. I was ready to be healthy. I was ready to live again.

Obviously I didnt get to act upon these feelings right away. I still could barely walk, breathe, or move in general. I still felt severe pain daily. I still slept most of the time. Slowly I got better. The pounds melted off on their own as I learned how to eat like a new born baby. I retrained my tastebuds and cravings. I learned a new way to eat that I had never done before. As each day passed life got a wee bit easier. I follower the rules to the letter and continued to reseach RNY because the more I learned the more I realized this would be a life long learning process. I treat my rny like having a new disease that I must maintain and treat to stay healthy.

I made my pre plastic surgery goal by the end of my first year. I have lost 26 pounds in the 6 months since then. I am awaiting plastics currently (no date but it wont be long now). 

I have to say that I havent "messed up" along the way. I havent treated RNY like a diet so there is no "messing" up. Sometimes I do eat to comfort myself, sometimes I eat when Im bored, sometimes I eat until I too full, sometimes I eat food that is sub par. At the end of the day my totals add up to "healthy" and my choices add up to awesome. I make my daily goals simple, 120+ grams protein, 25+ grams fiber, 1500-2000 calories. But there are many days I dont meet one or another goals and that's ok, one day in my life doesnt affect my over all health.I follow the protein forward and first always and I never drink with meals. I make the best food decisions possible and accept some will be lesser, some will be greater and most will be average.

NO I havent had the "carb monster" on my back, I have eaten carbs since day 2 post op. My plan called for a normal healthy diet simply higher in protein that other people would eat or need. I have been able to eat more than 100 carbs a day since around 8 months out. I count them on occaision just for fun and maybe to sneer at the carbaphobes.

Its my observation that most of the biggest carbaphobes around are falling off track a lot. They are 5dpt like mad and cursing their scales. I suggest letting GOOD carbs into your life, and plenty of them and the severe cravings for bad food will die. Im sure once deprived of an adequate amount of carbs for long enough the brain begins to implode and demand carbs, the easiest most absorbable carbs possible so it can be fed! Starvation of any nutrient can make you insane. Hence weird illnesses like pica. 

I know Im doing "something" right that's different than a lot of people because life post op has gotten easier, not harder. My self esteem and confidence are greater, not lesser. My love of my body is at an all time high, even in the sag condition. 

Do I want junk food? Ummm newp. 
Do I want to hide from life through eating? Newp.
Do I have any urge to reduce calories when my scale is 5 pounds high for a week? Hell NO!

I, like many, started off this journey to get my life back. I have it. Too many people forget their focus along the way. Suddenly its about clothing sizes and scale numbers. Long since forgotten is the high blood pressure, sleep apnea, diabetes and shame. Now its all about being skinny and health not even part of the equation. Well that may be your "keeping it real" but it isnt mine. Im keeping it real by remebering how far Ive come, what my goals were and still are and just living life as a small person with normal problems.

I have problems, its true. My most recent problem is a VERY close friend has deleted me from her life. Im sad, angry, shocked, sorry, and a million other emotions. Strangely, Im not hungry so I guess problems, even the BIG ones are easier after RNY for me. 

smoochies and thanks for being here :)

My motto is "you worry about eating right and making new good habits, the weight will take care of itself!"

I have lived by this rule because I really examined what I did "wrong" when I lost weight in the past, pre op. 

Stalls!! Everytime I stopped losing weight I stopped caring about the health and started thinking about crap food again. I considered the dwindling numbers on the scale my reward for giving up food I loved. This was a disaster waiting to happen.

Now a days I consider having energy and no horrible guilt over binging to be my reward. I remember back to 18 months ago and what my life had become. THAT is my reward.

The problem with people who get too bent out of shape over stalls, they arent mentally prepared to stop losing weight. Eventually we all do. What happens to people who obsess about the scale moving (up or down) when they no longer have that to focus on? They continue to obsess about it and make their maintenance a living hell. I see it here everyday. They live by the scale. They are "normal" weight wearing "normal" clothes but they havent figured out how to BE normal. 

Normal is IF I know Im eating right, who cares what the scale says? Who cares what number is on the inside of my jeans? These are such insignificant numbers in the world why let them dictate your free time with exercising like mad or 5 day pouch tests every month or cutting out cals and carbs until those evil 5 pounds are gone?

My body is pretty smart, smarter than me when it comes to why/how it weighs. All I have to do is fuel it properly and it will be healthy (even at 160 180 200 pounds!)

I wanted to share that at 18 months out, 183 pounds down I am still using all of the RNY habits I learned early on. I did it enough that I no longer think about it I just do it. If anything its less work to be strict about food than not, in my opinion. I never feel overwhelmed with what do I eat? How do I get my protein in? Did I eat too many calories? Do I eat too much? and more questions that haunt the formerly obese, scared that sneak attack fat is waiting around every corner.

The following is a picture of something I do most every week since surgery day. I cook my meals ahead and pre portion those which need measuring.

This weeks menu is 4z lean white meat shake n bake pork chops x 8, chicken divan x 2, chicken cordon bleu x 2, roast turkey breast and gravey x 5 and stir fry fat free veggies x 7.

This isnt everything I eat in the run of a week. There is also apples, salad, yogurt, protein bars, lattes, protein shakes, popcorn, cashews, bran snacks and more to add in. These are just the "hard" meals that I might be too lazy to cook while Im hungry.

I love to freeze a couple of every indi portion so my freezer usually has many dishes to choose from if I have a hankering for something specific.

HUGS
PK

I spend about 60$ a month on vitamins, minerals and fiber suppliments, I use about 30$ a month of protein suppliments (by choice cause I love the protein bars) and I also spend about 200$ a month on new tiny clothes, shoes and jackets... This weight loss thing costs a lot ;)

I save about 400$ a month by not ordering delivery and munching on junk food every day...

Technically Im ahead 110$ a month... But I spend that on doing activities I was too big to do before, like living and stuff...

foobear Medford, MA Daniel Jones, M.D. RNY (11/27/07) Member Since: 11/02/07 [Latest Posts]

Post Date: 3/5/08 10:31 am > One of the board nurses can chime in here to remind us > all why calcium labs mean nothing *please :)* Glad to oblige. Your blood calcium levels (lab tests) will almost always be fine, because your body needs calcium levels in your fluids maintained within a very fine tolerance; too low and you'll die, too high, and you'll die.  To avoid this, your body has a precise mechanism to keep blood calcium levels within this window of safety. If you don't ingest sufficient amounts of calcium in your diet (for post-op RNYers, that means calcium citrate supplements) and take enough Vitamin D to ensure that it can be absorbed from the gut, your parathyroid gland releases parathyroid hormone (PTH) which causes the calcium you need to stay alive to be leached from your bones and reenter the circulation as calcium ions.  Think of your bones as a calcium "savings account" which the body can draw upon at any time to keep you alive.  That's great, but just like your $$$ saving account today, it isn't an infinite storehouse. THAT'S WHY SERUM CALCIUM MEASUREMENTS SAY NOTHING ABOUT WHETHER YOU'RE GETTING ENOUGH CALCIUM IN YOUR DIET.  Unless you have some other physiological derangement going on (various diseases can cause high or low blood calcium), your blood calcium should ordinarily be maintained within this small window, regardless of whether you're being compliant with your calcium and vitamin D supplements or not. If this dietary calcium deficit persists over many years, all those calcium withdrawals from your bones will start to make them full of holes and threadbare.  Read: osteoporosis, collapsed vertebrae, broken hips and other bones.  And, believe me, it's far far easier and more effective to PREVENT osteoporosis by paying attention to your calcium and vitamin D supplements NOW than to try to deal with it after you've had a DEXA bone density scan and found out that you have osteopenia or osteoporosis.  And who wants to find that out AFTER they've broken a bone?!  By that time, the horse has long left the barn. The situation is even more critical for post-menopausal women, since they're at risk of osteoporosis even without having had WLS.  And men who have had RNY or DS surgeries also need to be vigilant, too.  Post-op, we're all Sally Field!  /Steve

DISCLAIMER:
I do brag posts for many reasons, the biggest reason is that it is my belief that most people dont cheer themselves on enough. Not wls people, obese people or skinny people, just people in general. I think that negativity flows all around us and its hard not to get sucked into that way of thinking for just about everyone.

Post weight loss surgery is a hard time to brag. There is always another goal, another issue, another pain, another problem, another loss that isnt what we wanted. 

I make brag posts to not say "hey look at me" but to say "hey look at us" Im not looking for congrats Im looking to hear where others can look within and find their strengths and triumphs they may have been over looking while focusing on the negative aspects of life.

Its easier to be negative than positive. That is a simple fact. Most people in MY world dont need help learning how to spot problems, they need help learning how to spot accomplishments. I hope you ALL can find something special you would like to brag about today and say HEY LOOK AT ME! Cause you REALLY are awesome and deserve it.

OH I soooo totally feel like bragging :)

Pre op when I went to the dietician we talked about goal weights. I told her I didnt have a real goal weight other than any weight that gets me my life back. I settled on a scale of goals. I expected that I would lose 100 pounds. I would have liked to lose more. 100 pounds lost would take me to a weight I can move, live and be "healthy" at. I considered that my must have goal. I wanted to never see a 2-- again. 199 or less was my lifetime goal. Regain happens. People get sick or older and lifestyles change but through it all I thought 199 or less was a reasonable hope for me. I wouldnt stomp my foot and pout if I didnt get this, but I did want it. Assuming that were possible I had a plastic surgery tummy tuck goal of 170 pounds. In 2006 I actually journaled that I hoped to be 170 by right now so that I could have plastic surgery in this month. Assuming I had plastic surgery I had the final goal of a 150 - 170 pound landing strip. I have weighed in this zone before and I felt and looked great/normal. This was my ultimate "goal". I had no dream/expectation/belief that I would need goals beyond this point. I am still pre plastic surgery and today I weigh.... 145 pounds, still carrying 10 pounds of excess tummy skin the surgeon will remove this year. In essence I am a 135 pound woman wearing a 10 pound untanned leather swim suit :P

Amazement and shock do not even touch the extent of my feelings right now. I dont know the word that can accurately describe this. I feel like Jody Foster in "Contact " when she travels to a different solar system. 

So my brag isnt that I weigh 145 pounds. My brag is that Im in my 18th month post op, I am still losing weight, I feel amazing, I look normal and I love my eating plan. I have never fallen off track post op because I dont have that kind of system. I do allow for all of my personal food desires, in the healthiest most reasonable way possible. I dont let being thin rule me. I dont obsess over how much weight I gained this week, yes I still go UP as much as down most weeks. Most of all, I dont forget where I have come from and WHY I did this to start with. Those meager goals from pre op have really dictated my ability to just enjoy this new life rather than mope about it. 

I sometimes feel very alone in the maintenance world of formerly obese people. The extreme ends are people who have regained and give up versus people who have lost it all and obsess about it so much that any gain sends them in a tailspin of totally revamping their diet. In the middle? Its a small group of people and I am very happy to be one of them and very sad to have so few companions here with me to enjoy it.

So come one and come all, toot your horns, love yourself and be the first to congratulate your total awesomeness cause sometimes no one else will do it for ya ;)

Snugs n Hugs!

Getting Started

If you want to lose fat or change your body, one of the most important things you can do is lift weights. Diet and cardio are equally important, but when it comes to changing how your body looks, weight training wins hands down. If you've hesitated to start a strength training program, it may motivate you to know that lifting weights can:

• Help raise your metabolism. Muscle burns more calories than fat, so the more muscle you have, the more calories you'll burn all day long.
• Strengthen bones, especially important for women
• Make you stronger and increase muscular endurance
• Help you avoid injuries
• Increase your confidence and self-esteem
• Improve coordination and balance

Getting started with strength training can be confusing--what exercises should you do? How many sets and reps? How much weight? The routine you choose will be based on your fitness goals as well as the equipment you have available and the time you have for workouts.

The Basics

If you're setting up your own program, you'll need to know some basic strength training principles. These principles will teach you how to make sure you're using enough weight, determine your sets and reps and insure you're always progressing in your workouts.

1. Overload: To build muscle, you need to use more resistance than your muscles are used to. This is important because the more you do, the more your body is capable of doing, so you should increase your workload to avoid plateaus. In plain language, this means you should be lifting enough weight that you can ONLY complete the desired number of reps. You should be able to finish your last rep with difficulty but also with good form.
2. Progression. To avoid plateaus (or adaptation), you need to increase your intensity regularly. You can do this by increasing the amount of weight lifted, changing your sets/reps, changing the exercises and changing the type of resistance. You can make these changes on a weekly or monthly basis.
3. Specificity. This principle means you should train for your goal. That means, if you want to increase your strength, your program should be designed around that goal (e.g., train with heavier weights closer to your 1 RM (1 rep max)). To lose weight, choose a variety of rep ranges to target different muscle fibers.
4. Rest and Recovery. Rest days are just as important as workout days. It is during these rest periods that your muscles grow and change, so make sure you're not working the same muscle groups 2 days in a row.

Before you get started on setting up your routine, keep a few key points in mind:

1. Always warm up before you start lifting weights. This helps get your muscles warm and prevent injury. You can warm up with light cardio or by doing a light set of each exercise before going to heavier weights.
2. Lift and lower your weights slowly. Don't use momentum to lift the weight. If you have to swing to get the weight up, chances are you're using too much weight.
3. Breathe. Don't hold your breath and make sure you're using full range of motion throughout the movement.
4. Stand up straight. Pay attention to your posture and engage your abs in every movement you're doing to keep your balance and protect your spine.

Choosing Exercises, Sequence & Weight

Your first step in setting up a routine is to choose exercises to target all of your muscle groups. If you need guidance, you can:

• Hire a Personal Trainer
• Try Home Workout Videos or,
• Work with an Online Personal Trainer.

  For beginners, you want to choose about 8-10 exercises, which comes out to about one exercise per muscle group. The list below offers some examples:

  • Chest: bench press, chest press machine, pushups, pec deck machine
  • Back: one-armed row, seated row machine, back extensions, lat pulldowns
  • Shoulders: overhead press, lateral raise, front raise
  • Biceps: bicep curls, hammer curls, concentration curls
  • Triceps: tricep extensions, dips, kickbacks
  • Quadriceps: Squats, lunges, leg extension and leg press machines
  • Hamstrings: deadlifts, lunges, leg curl machine
  • Abs: crunches, reverse crunches, oblique twists, pelvic tilts

  Check out the strength training and cardio workouts available at Workout Central

  Sequence of Exercises

  • Make sure you choose at least one exercise for each major muscle group.
  • The muscles to work include: Chest, back, shoulders, biceps, triceps, quadriceps, hamstrings, calves and abdominals.
  • If you leave any muscle group out, this could cause an imbalance in your muscles and possibly lead to injuries.

  Most experts recommend starting with your larger muscle groups and then proceeding to the smaller muscle groups.
  
  The most demanding exercises are those performed by your large muscle groups and you will need your smaller muscles to get the most out of these exercises. But, don't feel limited by that. You can do your exercises in any order you like and changing the order is a great way to challenge yourself in different ways.

  How Much Weight To Use

  The easiest way to determine how much weight you should use on each lift is to guess (not very scientific, huh?):

  1. Pick up a light weight and do a warm up set of the exercise of your choice, aiming for about 10 to 16 repetitions.
  2. For set 2, increase your weight by 5 or more pounds and perform your goal number of repetitions. If you can do more than your desired number of reps, heavy up again for your 3rd set.
  3. In general, you should be lifting enough weight that you can ONLY do the desired reps. You should be struggling by the last rep, but still able to finish it with good form.
  4. It may take awhile to find the right amount of weight for each exercise.
  5. In general, you can use heavier weights with larger muscle groups such as chest, back and legs. You'll need smaller weights for the shoulders and arms.

Choosing Repetitions and Sets

How Many Reps/Sets To Do

You've figured out how much weight to use for your chosen exercises...what about the number of sets and repetitions? Your decision should be based on your goals. The American College of Sports Medicine recommends 8-12 reps for muscular strength and 10-15 reps for muscular endurance. They also recommend at least 1 set of each exercise to fatigue although you'll find that most people perform about 2-3 sets of each exercise. In general:

• For fat loss: 1-3 sets of 10-12 reps using enough weight that you can ONLY complete the desired reps.
• To gain muscle: 3+ sets of 6-8 reps to fatigue. For beginners, give yourself several weeks of conditioning before going to this level.You may need a spotter for many exercises.
• For health and endurance: 1-3 sets of 12-16 reps using enough weight that you can ONLY complete the desired reps.

• How Long To Rest Between Exercises/Workout Sessions

  This will depend on your goal. Higher intensity (i.e., when lifting heavy) exercise requires a longer rest. When lifting to fatigue, it takes an average of 2 to 5 minutes for your muscles to rest for the next set. When using lighter weight and more repetitions, it takes between 30 seconds and 1 minute for your muscles to rest.

  The American College of Sports Medicine recommends training each muscle group 2 to 3 times a week. But, the number of times you lift each week will depend on your training method. In order for muscles to repair and grow, you'll need about 48 hours of rest between workout sessions. If you're training at a high intensity, take a longer rest.

  Where to Workout

  You don't have to join a gym to get a great strength training workout. A gym is nice because you'll have access to both machines and free weights, so you have plenty of variety. If you do join a gym, it's a good idea to incorporate both types of equipment into your workout routine for variety. What's the difference? This article explains all.

  If you decide to workout at home, here are a few items you might want to consider buying:

• Resistance bands are around $6 to $15. They're small, light, travel well and you get get a full body workout with it.
• Dumbbells. They're cheap and you can do a variety of exercise with them. Find them at your local Target or Walmart. Other options include a barbell set, an exercise ball and/or a weight bench.
• A step is more expensive (a good one goes for around $85 or so) but you can use for everything from step aerobics to weight bench to plant-holder (although I don't recommend it for that).
• For tips on setting up your home gym, check out this in-depth article.
• For more, see Best Strength Training Equipment

 Is your inner voice a trash-talker? If you've tried and failed to reach your fitness goals in the past, negative thoughts might have been what held you back. Want to succeed this time? Get your journal (or log on to your online Fitness Diary). It's time to get some of those thoughts out of your head and onto paper. Ask yourself the following questions:

1. Do you have a negative self-image?
Do you constantly say things like "I'm fat" or "I'm ugly"? Do you pick yourself apart and beat yourself up when you look in the mirror?

2. Do you lack self-confidence?
Do you doubt your ability to achieve your goals, weight-related or otherwise? Do you dwell on your perceived limits or fears? Do you doubt your ability to accomplish the things you want to accomplish?

3. Do you feel powerless?
Do you feel as if you have no control over your life, or do you rely on excuses like "I'm genetically predisposed to being overweight"?

4. Do you label yourself in self-deprecating ways?
Do you think and talk about your failure to lose weight as a foregone conclusion? Do you refer to yourself mockingly (or not!) as a stereotype — the happy/funny fat person in the room? Is your e-mail address "fatso@blank. com"?

Now think about your responses. How would you describe the tone of your answers? Are they affirming and constructive, or downbeat and destructive? Want to turn your thinking around? The following question will help you understand why you have been propagating these destructive thoughts and behaviors so that we can cut them out at the root.

5. How is this negativity hurting you?
Is what you say about yourself really the truth? Or is it a defense mechanism? And if so, against what? Are you just making complicated excuses? How does this kind of negativity help you achieve your goals? The answers to these questions should help you start to see what's at the root of your negative thinking.

Now go back and answer the five questions again, and force yourself to use only positive terms. It can be hard to let go of these negative thought patterns. Often, they're the result of years of self-loathing and your internalizing of the negative opinions and judgments of others, but you can do it. Remember, knowledge is power. Next time one of those negative thoughts crops up, you'll have the awareness to cut it down.