Question:
Did anyone see Vanessa Minnillo on Entertainment Tonight last

week and last night?? *Warning, this is a long post so get ready...She decked herself out in a "fat suit" to experience and play the part of a 350 lbs morbidly obese female in downtown New York. Did you actually see how people stared at her? How the whispered about her behind her back? How they were so rude-she tried to exit a subway train, and was literally pushed back by other passengers like she didn't even exist? Their gawking at her when she ordered a hot dog with all the *fixins* and a bagel with a LOT of cream cheese? All of this made me VERY ANGRY at how society treats the obese...let alone the morbidly obese!! She actually felt what we go through...the humiliation, the shame, the low self esteem. There are a lot of other people I wish that could have observed this. It should have been something that ALL of America should have tuned in to. Some of their family members could be in this very same condition. I wonder how they would feel if their family member was treated like that!! She went into several stores to do shopping for clothes, and NO ONE offered to assist or help her or even asked if she was "finding everything ok", They just looked her up and down, whispered and laughed...How insensitive and rude some people can be. I can remember though, before my weight got out of control, and I thought I was "Mrs. It, I used to do the very same thing, laugh, and talk about how nasty and sloppy fat people looked. I USED to think that all of the obese were lazy. Little did I realize further down the road, my day was coming. Well now, I, for one, can say, I experienced the very same things several years ago. No one even thought to ask me out to lunch...I wasn't in the *clique". Everyone assumed I was the happy-go-lucky, fat, jovial, preacher lady that always had a smile on her face and everything was hunky-dorrey in her life. Little did they know that despite the fact that I loved the Lord, and had my spiritual awakening and relationship with God, I was STILL hurting inside.. How rude society can be...no mater what their ethnicity or religious beliefs might be!!! What are your thoughts?? I'm interested, because it seems like I'm blowing up again. Thanks in advance for resonding!!:) Proximal LAP RNY 9/3/02 5'2" 265/176/126-115 I'm on my way back!! Hadiyah McCutcheon, a.k.a.~~    — yourdivaness (posted on November 16, 2005)

November 15, 2005
I seen this also and I do remember being treated like that.It's very sad and makes me sick to think that people are like that.I can remember one time just after I had my baby girl I was in wal-mart I was looking at a new out fit and this KID I will call him because he was no man any way was with his girlfriend or wife and her mom and he mooed at me well even her mom was laughing very sad that we do this and if we do this just think what we let our kids get by with.
   — Shelly LaChance

November 15, 2005
See, I never had any negative experiences in the whole 10 years I've been MO. Or so I would have told you. Now I wonder how much went on behind my back, or after I'd gone, or on the sidelines. Shame. The only thing I didn't like is how she suggested (at the end) that all fat people would have to do to "fix" this is look people in the eye, smile and be friendly. She may have donned a fat suit and lived a day in the life, and blessings on her that she did; it took courage and I do believe she is the better for it. But she in no way knows what it's like to LIVE the life. To be unable to go home, remove the suit, and be back to your beautiful slim self, and then go confront all the slimeballs who hurt your feelings. We don't have that luxury. Maybe that's why we don't find it so easy to meet their gaze with a friendly smile. Tonight she confronts the idiots. Tune in. It ought to be entertaining.
   — Jeanie

November 16, 2005
You know, I have never experienced the degree of discrimination that was exhibited in that show but I have suffered the embarrassment that goes along with, as well as the self consciousness, the lack of self esteem. I was like you and was just like those people who made fun, laughed behind people's back and made rude comments. I look at my obesity now as a wake up call from God telling me that I should never judge because I will be judged! I have been on both sides of the fence and I am 53 waiting to experience a life altering surgery to become the healthy person I was before. I believe that obesity is an illness just like any other and should be treated as such. I had my pulmonologist ask me how long have you been obese and when I said 20 years his response was, "what happened?" Do you know I couldn't answer that?! I had to sit there and think. What changed? I know that obese people are not lazy nor are we any different from anyone else. People can be cruel, insensitive and rude not realizing that at some point in their life they could be in the same situation! I have changed so much in the way I view anyone and I realize that I am the same person inside I was before I gained weight. Now, I want to be healthy and I want to feel good about myself. To heck with anyone else, I am doing this for ME!
   — misty01

November 16, 2005
My oldest son who is 6'6" and 170 pounds (nope, never had an overweight day in his life LOL) use to nail some of the kids he went to school with. They would start making fun of fat people and he would just look at them and say....You know my mom is over 300#. Since most of them knew and liked me....it would shut them up instantly. I've also had very skinny friends that defended me to the end. One told me at her wedding not to dance with one guy because he'd made a rude comment about me. I could go clothes shopping with her without even thinking about it because she would help me choose what looked good on me. But, I have had my share of bad experiences also. People look at us differently when we are morbidly obese. And, Ms. Minnillo has a point. When we are morbidly obese, we DON'T look anyone in the eye...not if they aren't as fat as we are anyway. We avoid contact....think about it and watch some obese people next time you're out and about. However, just looking people in the eye and smiling won't change perceptions about the obese. Only people can do that and, sadly, I don't see it happening in the near future. Carmen
   — kccjer

November 16, 2005
I did not see it, but I am constantly amazed at how differently people treat me now that I am no longer a land whale! I still need to go down another hundred pounds, but already I can see the difference in how I am treated. Guys hold doors for me differently, and are very much more polite. So are women. It really kind of annoys me, because I am the same person. I have not always been fat, though. My niece was fat all her life, and had the surgery almost two years ago. For the first time in her life, men respond to her. She is really a knowckout, although she has always been pretty. Jay McGraw (Dr. Phil, Jr) did a story in which he put on a fat suit (only moderately overweight), and was made up to look balding and dressed more casually than usual. He was amazed at how he was treated and how terrible he felt about it. For those people, I say they cannot feel what it is like, because they know they can just take the fat suit offf and be treated normally. FAt is perceived as being our fault, when often we exercise, eat right, and do everything right, but gain weight anyway.
   — Novashannon

November 16, 2005
Just forgot to say that I DO look people in the eyes and smile. I have always been friendly and outgoing. People were usually nice to me, but there was a subtle difference. So Vanessa is totally wrong. I never felt inferior, except in the looks department, but not as a person.
   — Novashannon

November 17, 2005
Hadiyah I'm glad they aired that show. Maybe they could run it again. As you, I have also been the brunt of "Fat discrimination and jokes or barbed comments. Try being fat and handicapped,they look at you like you self inflicted your handicap. Oh well, they are the losers. I know who and what I am, I am a child of the LORD GOD, and grateful to be so. I'm glad you are too. Tomanip
   — TomanipP

November 17, 2005
WEll I watched it and I liked it.It for me showed that not morbidly obese people are obese from eating.There are some that have diagnosed medical conditions contributing to the "fat factor". I think that she herself learned alot from doing it.It happens to us everyday sometimes more blatently then others but it happens every day none the less. I have gotten to the point where I don't care to eat out in fmaily restaurants because people look to see what you eat.Thats just plain rude.I am so glad I will not have to go through this ridicule anymore.
   — DellaF

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