Question:
Seeking Others Who Had No One At Home to Help Post Op.

I am divorced and my kids will be with my ex the week I return from the hospital. I don't want him to know about the surgery. I had planned on just taking care of myself. Is this unreasonable?    — Sharon B. (posted on April 16, 2003)


April 16, 2003
I just wanted to let you know my husband was going to take off work. I did not need anyone. I sat and watched TV, I walked around my yard, I fixed my own protein drinks, and whatever else I felt like. I did not do any heavy lifting. Just my journey all is different. Good luck and God Bless.
   — Lana H.

April 16, 2003
hi sharon :) first of all, congrats on your upcoming surgery! i have a friend that is in the same situation and she did well all on her own,her surgery went very well and there were no complications.. had i known her at the time, i would have offered my help. she did very well, just took it slow . im sure you can do it too !id do things ahead of time like have pillows placed in a nice comfy chair incase you cant lie flat for a while, have your vitamins in an easy to reach place, have things bought like lotion, chap stick, wetwipes incase your nor up to a shower on some days, maybe one of those lifty medical stick things to help you avoid bending down too much if you have to pick stuff up and have broths and sf jellos and bottled water and crystal lite and the like stocked ahead of time so you dont have to drive to buy this stuff after as you may not be up to it. tip though, you wont need alot alot of food so you dont need to go too crazy on all that stuff, oh also depending on your surgeons specific diet instructions, eggs n cottage cheese might be good items to have too, but it just depends on what you tolerate. i wish you the best of luck sweety! even during the rough times you may or may not encounter , just remember the saying "this too shall pass" and its all so very worth it! email if ya need a good listening ear. [email protected]
   — carrie M.

April 16, 2003
Just have a backup in case. I planned on being able to do alot for myself after surgery and had a really bad time. When I came home I could not even get up from toilet or wipe myself. I am three weeks post op can do all that myself now but still cannot get up from a lying position on the bed my husband has to help me. I also am still so weak I can do small things like getting a drink etc but to care for kids at this point I know I would not be able to. I had an open RNY. Hope that helps.
   — thesaurkratkid

April 16, 2003
Hey good luck on your surgery. I stayed home by myself the entire time after surgery my husband had to work and kids in school. It will be fine just trust in GOD he will help you. I have never been week since my surgery. GOOD LUCK Debbie
   — Debbie C.

April 16, 2003
Sharon, I don't think its unreasonable. I had someone with me after my WLS, but I was actually fine and not in much pain. I didn't have anyone with me after I had both my abdominoplasty/breast lift and thigh lift and I was fine both times. The worse pain was from the thigh lift. I had bought five gallon water home with me and kept it upstairs (yeah it was warm, but I tolerated it), I also had other foods and protein supplements with me. I really only had to go down the stairs twice a day if I wanted to. I think we all have to do what we have to do. Hopefully, you will be able to call someone to help you if you are not getting along by yourself. Best of luck!
   — Lisa N M.

April 16, 2003
Hi! I live alone. Some things were difficult the first few days (I had an open RNY) but I managed. My beautiful sister was a phone call and a couple blocks away in case I really needed help. Plus, she took my dog for a while since I would not be able to scoop his poops!) I made sure I had jello, broth, water, and popsicles before I went in. However as another poster suggested, it is a prudent idea to get a backup, a neighbor or friend who will be available as you will not be able to drive for a while (depending on your surgery). It's best to play it safe. terry
   — Terry R.

April 16, 2003
Hi Sharon~ I am almost 12 weeks post-op lap RNY. I have 4 kids, all in school except my little one who is 2. I was worried, since we were the only ones home all day, but it all wokred out great. I was fine when I came home from teh hospital. I have heard soem people need to take naps often, but that is ok, if you need them. You should be fine. Everyone has different recovery, so it is hard to predict what it will be like. good luck, and don't worry about it, cross that bridge when you get there.
   — Sandy H.

April 16, 2003
I did the hospital alone and I live by myself. I am 50 years old. I did ok home alone. I wish I had made arrangements to have someone with me at the hospital. There are not enough nurses to go around. I needed someone to answer phone, get cups of ice, help me walk, hold my hand.
   — Wanda R.

April 16, 2003
HI! I just wanted to thank ya for askign such a question. It has eased my mind knowing that most people who need to do it alone or mostly alone doing ok! I am having my surgery this next tuesday and I am a very independent person and I was thinking the same thing. I will have my 10 year-old around in the evenings after school to truly help me, plus i only have a one story. I do have some backups in case i have diffculties but I plan to be as self sufficient as possible, including driving my 6 yr old back and forth from school.
   — Kerry R.

April 16, 2003
Hi, Sharon. Congrats on having the nerve to come home alone. You can do it! I'm single and live alone and was alone every night. No problem. I had the lap RNY surgery Tues, came home 1 day early on Thurs. My brother dropped me off (he had to get to work) and I went to sleep in the recliner, my sister dropped off the meds a few hours later and back to sleep I went in the recliner. I NEVER had a problem. Thank God for that recliner though. I slept in it for....I think nearly 2 weeks. Today I'm four weeks out and there's nothing I wouldn't do (except maybe haul bags of top soil!). You'll be fine. You go girl! Best of luck to you. Email me if you'd like more info.
   — msmaryk




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