All About Michelle O.
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 As long as I can remember I was always heavy or as doctors call it "Morbidly Obese". Do you remember way back in school when you had to endure the bus drills in case of an emergency? These drills consisted of having to jump out the back door of the bus which stands a few feet up from the ground. I was horrified of the "drills" why because fat kids don?t jump off things simply put we fall and "bounce". I was in kindergarten at the time when my first bus drill landed a permanent memory in my life. The kids who were "helping" with the drill took my hands and instead of helping me flung me to the ground. I guess seeing a fat kid roll on the ground is funny in some peoples mind. I ended up going home that day with my legs all bloody from the pavement. To this day I remember all the cruel jokes and names that I endured until high school. I remember all the times I came home and cried because I could not figure out why no one wanted to be my friend.
So life went on and I grew strong inside some how developing a strong character and personality. After all what does not kill you makes you stronger. I always had a love for food. I was raised to always clean your plate...never mind that you had more then enough but you should eat everything. A value that I will never instill in my children. I also grew up with a mother that can cook unbelievably good. Food was always the focus whether you had a good time somewhere or not the first question was what kind of food was there? What did you eat?
I decided around the age of 20 it was time to get moving and change my life. Some how I always pictured myself as a healthy individual whenever I pictured myself "down the road"in life. Anytime I went to a doctor appointment I swore that I was changing my ways and going to loose the weight. I carried an additional 160 pounds on my body. I bought an elliptical and made a routine of doing it everyday. I did great and I saw results. My weight and blood pressure went down. I was doing great until I went on vacation....we all know that routine was shot down the drain from there on out.
 I started to research RNY surgery over the internet and found pretty scary stuff. Nothing was as scary as when I filled out a questionnaire to find out if you are a candidate for the procedure. I stared at the computer screen as I saw my BMI of 46. The only thought that went through my mind was "HOLY MOLY YOUR HALF FAT!" It scared me.
I decided to switch doctor?s and start over. I started eating healthy and exercising. I lost twenty pounds then not an ounce more. I then knew it was my time to consider RNY. January 11, 2005 I sat so excited as I waited for my stroll into the operating room. I was very confident in my surgeon and my decision. I had done a TON of research and preparing not only mentally but physically. I was ready and willing and not nervous. My parents came in to sit with me while I was waiting...what does my mom do...she turns the TV on to Food Channel. Right then I think I thought oh God help me!
I am now 17 months out and down 157 pounds. Have I succeeded? It all depends on what you consider succeeding. I have lost my extra weight, I have learned to exercise and be active, I eat healthy and high protein, and I take my vitamins religiously. For me it?s keeping it off and not gaining it back. I am 27 years old and just now beginning to live my life.
Finding balance is the key in my mind. Balance in my eating, exercising, my mentality with an "obese" mind, and in my relationships with people. I never thought I would ever enjoy working out. I now have an active gym membership and use it. Cardiovascular workouts are one of my favorites mainly because I picture the fat melting away and my heart getting stronger. I aim for 45- 60 minutess of cardio four to five days a week. Right now it?s through jogging/walking. Being outdoors this time of the year is just peaceful to me. The elliptical, treadmill, Arctrainer, and bikes are my choices to mix things up. I try to switch routines every couple of weeks to keep boredom away. Lifting weights for me has been very helpful in how my body reshaped itself. Using a combination of free weights and machines keeps it going. I like to challenge myself and set new goals. Sometimes they can be little things like pushing a higher weight or trying to jog further then the day before but they keep me going.
  Never give up on yourself. I can not believe how much my body can do now that it gets the nutrition it needs and the peace of mind when I exercise. When I first started out I thought I was going to kill over within less then five minutes of walking. Now I beat my skinny friends up stairs and I am not out of breath. Your body is capable of doing so much. You dream the dream and you can achieve it. Always take it in baby steps is my thought a little at a time and you will get to where you want to go. After all you can not change your destination overnight but you CAN change your DIRECTION!
Take Care,
Michelle
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