How did you first find out about bariatric surgery and what were your initial impressions of it?

I'd heard of stomach stapling years ago. I'd read magazine articles too. I'd even gone so far as calling a local surgeon but discovered I wasn't eligible because I didn't weigh over 400 pounds. I knew that surgical intervention was the ONLY solution for me but it wasn't readily available several years ago. Like lots of folks, I saw television shows and saw magazine articles about Carnie Wilson after she had surgery. At that time I knew that I'd find a way to have the surgery no matter what I had to do.

Describe your experience with getting insurance approval for surgery. What advice, if any, do you have for other people in this stage?

I'm so fortunate that my experience was easy. My surgeon's office was actually the only slow part of the insurance process. I thought they'd never get around to submitting the request for surgery. Once the request made it to BCBS it took exactly two weeks to get approval. The one piece of advice I'd offer is this: Make a friend at the insurance company. If the Customer Service Rep who answers the phone seems friendly and willing to help just ask them "Can I call you back directly so I won't have to explain everything all over again?" Then, call faithfully twice a week. I called on Tuesday mornings and Friday afternoons. This gives the computer time to update. Let the insurance company know that you're serious and stay on top of it. Finally, even if you're feeling like strangling someone over a long delay, try to be SUPER nice. This really seems to pay off.

What was your first visit with your surgeon like? How can people get the most out of this meeting?

I immediately developed a great rapport with Dr. Clements. He was young, personable, thorough and seemed genuinely interested in me. He made me feel good about myself and his confidence quickly became mine and I knew I was making the right decision. I'd urge everyone to make a list of questions. No matter how good your memory is you'll forget everything once the surgeon walks in the door and you realize your dream is about to become reality. So, you've got to take a list. Some people feel that bedside manner is simply a plus and will settle for a surgeon without this quality. For me, it was a MUST! My surgeon had to be someone that I felt cared about me as an individual. I needed to trust this person and if I felt that he didn't care about me then how could I trust him? Immediately upon meeting Dr. Clements I knew I'd had the good fortune to find the perfect surgeon for me. I felt complete faith and trust in him.

What made you finally decide to have the surgery?

I never really "finally" decided to have the surgery. It was almost as if I'd always known that surgery was the only answer for me. For as long as I can remember I'd wished I could have weight loss surgery.

How did you decide which proceedure to have?

I didn't research the different surgical options though I know many people do. I allowed my surgeon to make the decision about which particular procedure would be most appropriate for me. I trusted his experience and knowledge and followed his advice.

What fears did you have about having complications or even dying from from the surgery, and what would you tell other people having the same fears now?

In the weeks I waited to have surgery I felt very at peace about the whole thing. I felt the typical fears of "I'll be the only person this surgery won't work for" but other than that I was very at peace about it. In the two days preceding the surgery I began to have last minute jitters but still was never anxious or nervous. I had Type II Diabetes, rheumatoid arthritis, chronic fatigue syndrome, bad knees, shortness of breath and more. As far as fearing death, I knew that if I didn't have surgery then the associated health problems would result in misery or death. I'd tell anyone considering the surgery: Weigh the benefits realistically. Yes, there are people who die during surgery, any surgery. But, will the reduced quality of life associated with morbid obesity and possible death from various commorbidities prevent you from having surgery? I think most anyone would agree that the benefits far outweigh the risks.

How did your family and friends react to your decision? Would you have communicated anything differently if you could now? How supportive were they after your surgery?

Everyone who knew about my surgery was supportive both before and after. My friends and family were as excited if not more excited than I was. We kept the lines of communication open and I told everyone to ask any questions they wanted. Even my very tiny, normal neices have become addicted to the BEFORE and AFTER photos on the obesityhelp.com websight. My friends and family are WONDERFUL!!

How did your employer/supervisor react to your decision? What did you tell him/her? How long were you out of work?

My employer and supervisor were both very supportive. My immediate supervisor was a bit worried that surgical intervention was a bit drastic but still supported my decision. I sat down with my company owner and my supervisor separately and told them of my decision. I told them it was an opportunity I couldn't pass up. They were both happy for me and remain very supportive. Initially I was to be out of work for 2 weeks for LAP surgery. When my surgery was converted to OPEN I ended up having to be out for 6 weeks.

What was your stay in the hospital like? How long where you there? What things are most important to bring?

My hospital stay was totally unacceptable. You can read about it in my profile. I had very little care, the staff had no knowledge or understanding of WLS. My husband was my salvation during my hospital stay. He took wonderful care of me. If I'd only been allowed to bring one thing to the hospital, withouth a doubt, it would be a fan. Just to have the cool refreshing air blowing on me made me feel better. Something you like for chapped lips is important too. Other than that, your needs are generally very minimal while actually in the hospital. The fun begins when you get home!

Did you have any complications from the surgery? If so, how did you deal with them?

My surgery was supposed to be LAP but had to be converted to OPEN because of an enlarged liver. I heard the nurses talking in the recovery room and just thought to myself "AGHHHH". I'd had 2 C-sections and a hysterectomy with vertical incisions so I knew what to expect as far as surgery goes but I was very disappointed. The pain was easily managed with medication when I could get the hospital staff to actually bring me some. I also developed a staph infection and had to have the incision reopened and packed. This complication was awful. It wasn't particularly painful but it was so humiliating. My husband had to take care of it and I felt that he would never desire me as a woman again after having to deal with that disgusting, smelly mess. It was just awful and if occurred at a time when my surgeon was out of town. I had to see his partner and he was very rough and boorish. I actually felt sorry for this man's nurse once he left the room. She was embarrassed by his actions and kept telling me how sorry she was. There was nothing good or redeeming to say about the experience with the staph infection other than my husband was a saint and took very good care of me. Still, to get the results I've experienced I'd have the surgery along with the terrible hospital experience and staph infection all over again. WLS has been miraculous.

In the weeks after you got your surgery date, how did you feel? How did you cope with any anxiety you might have felt?

Oddly, I didn't have any anxiety until just the last couple of days. I had total peace about my decision. I stayed on this website alot reading profiles and looking at photos. I'd say I was far more excited than anxious.

How far did you travel to have your surgery? (If far, how did this affect your aftercare?)

Only about 5 miles. If anything good could be said about the doctor's office and hospital it would be that it was conveniently located. Of course, I'd have rather driven farther and had better care. Since it was so convenient my aftercare wasn't affected at all.

Please describe in detail what things you could and couldn't eat in the weeks and months following surgery. What foods have been off limits? Please explain how your dietary tolerance changed week-by-week, and then month-by-month since surgery.

I went home with a handshake and a "good luck to you" from the hospital nutritionist. I had absolutely no clue what to eat, how much to eat, anything! If I hadn't had this website I don't know what I would've done. The strangest thing is that I couldn't tolerate water well after surgery. It was wierd because I could eat Mexican food but a simple glass of water would nauseate me beyond belief! I don't have any off limits foods but I have foods that I can't keep in the house because it will call my name it until I eat it! I don't dump on sugar so that's both a good and bad thing. Initially I ate LOTS of scrambled eggs with cheese, instant oatmeal, grits, canned ravioli, bananas and other general mushy stuff. My surgeon didn't require a long liquid phase so I was very thankful about that. By 4 weeks I was back to eating anything. The funniest thing is that I would see people in restaurants sitting down to these big plates of food and it would nauseate me just to see how much they ate. It's been an adventure!

What vitamins and/or dietary supplements have you taken since your surgery?

I ALWAYS tell patients to strictly adhere to their surgeon's advice but I actually didn't adhere to mine. My surgeon vehemently opposes protein supplements. I was the queen of plateaus. I'd lose for 3 weeks and sit still for 3 weeks and lose for 3 weeks and sit still for 3 weeks. It was awful. I'd read so much about protein supplements on this website that I decided to try it for myself. When I first began this survey I was only a few months post op. Now I am 3 years post op and I still supplement protein. It's a great way to boost energy, cure those carb cravings and maintain the weight loss. I supplement calcium citrate also and take B-12 shots AND sublingual and 2 multi-vitamins daily.

What side effects (nausea, vomiting, sleep disturbace, dumping, hair loss etc.) were worse for you? For how long after surgery did they persist? How did you cope with them?

I think once I got beyond the conversion from LAP to OPEN and the staph infection my recovery and experience became a breeze. The only major complication I experienced was very excessive hair loss. I literally lost so much hair that I couldn't wear it down - I wore it in a little scraggly ponytail forever. Then my husband tricked me into going into a wig shop and I bought a fall. It's a hairpiece that clips into your hair and you sort of sweep your own hair up over top of it so it doesn't look like a wig. I LOVED IT! I wore it for about 7 months and then ended up getting my hair cut short once I'd lost enough weight that my face wasn't so round. I lost hair for about 6 months. I know there's nothing to prevent it but the protein supplements were very helpful in helping it to grow back in.

What aftercare support group/program do you have? How helpful/important is this?

While Birmingham is a large and sophisticated city we did not have a support group anywhere in the area for WLS patients. So, I started one myself and have had tremendous response. This has been SO inportant for me. Your friends and family can be totally supportive but it's still not the same as having someone who's "walked in your shoes". We meet once a month and it's just wonderful. It's motivational, encouraging and provides a great degree of accountability. You find that you don't want to let anyone down so you address food sensibly. I wouldn't give up the support group for anything.

What is your scar like? Is this what you expected?

Scars...ICK! My tummy looks like a roadmap but I never went in to this believing I'd wear a bikini so I don't care about the scars. I have lots of them and can honestly say they mean nothing to me or to my husband either.

Please describe any plateau experiences you have had since surgery.

As I've said earlier in the survery, I was the queen of plateaus. I would have 3 week plateaus every time I turned around. I finally learned there were several ways to bust them. The first and most important thing was to supplement protein. The next thing was to shake things up - increase calories by 200 one day and decrease them by 400 the next and increase by 300 the next until your metabolism just gives up and kicks back in. Plateaus are probably the most miserable part of the journey. Because we are a group of people with distorted body images and low self esteem it seems like every plateau makes us feel like a complete failure.

Do you notice people treating you any differently now?

Now that I work with bariatric patients we dscuss this alot. I stress that patients should not let the fact that people will treat you differently make them bitter. For example, one patient almost refused to date because she said the guys asking her out would never have given her a second glance prior to weight loss surgery. That may be true but we have to live in the present - be who we are - and work to educate the public about weight loss surgery. I do find that I am often taken more seriously now that I am not obese and some people on an administrative level may value my opinion more but not always. I've enjoyed the extra attention and the improved self-esteem. Occasionally women friends I haven't seen in a long time will see me and they seem a bit distant. It's almost as if I was "safe" when I was fat but now I'm competition. Nothing could be further from the truth but that's how it feels.