How did you first find out about bariatric surgery and what were your initial impressions of it?

After my ordeal with taking an Ephedra based weight loss drug, my primary care physician asked me, point blank, "Is losing weight worth dying for?" I was stunned. I looked at her, tears in my eyes and told her that was a hard question to answer. She looked shocked as if she expected me to immediately say "NO." I really honestly didn't feel that No, was the answer that popped into my head when she asked that question. She and I talked at length about all the things I'd done to attempt weight loss and all the accomplishments and then relapses that I'd had. She listened, and told me that what I'd done to my heart and blood pressure wasn't changing since I'd taken the Ephedra, and although no one would say that was definately what caused my troubles, they seemed to think there was a link between the two. My blood pressure was so high at this point that any increase would put me in the "Stroke" range, so I was told I could't do any form of cardio exercise, I couldn't let my heart rate increase above normal, and I really had no other options for weight loss. I considered my health, my risks, and my future and with brutal honesty from my PCP I basically knew my options were surgery soon or plan on having a stroke and die at an early age. My initial impression was fear, anxiety, excitement, and hopefulness. I hadn't thought I would be a candidate for this type of surgery, as I was overweight, but wasn't sure I'd meet the criteria.

Describe your experience with getting insurance approval for surgery. What advice, if any, do you have for other people in this stage?

I had no problems getting approval, so my help is limited in this area.

What was your first visit with your surgeon like? How can people get the most out of this meeting?

My first visit with the surgeon was an eye opener! I went in with a ton of questions. I wanted to know every little in and out of this surgery and he sat patiently and answered every one of them with complete honesty. I even asked question that shocked him, he told me that no one ever asked them but he answered them to my satisfaction. I had a list, I didn't want to forget anything. I suggest that you do your research before your meeting with the surgeon. Don't be afraid to question everything. This is your health you have to worry about. I have seen so many people take a doctors word for gospel, and without questioning the necessity, follow them into some pretty scary procedures. I worked in an ICU for years as a clerk and saw that not every doctor has the same expectations. Some really do think they are infoulable and perform risky tests/procedures on their patients. So, I questioned everything I could think of. I wanted to know what this surgery would do that may compromise my health down the road? Would this affect my ability to recover from other illnessess while I had a lower dietary intake? Would vitamins be enough to keep my immune system up while I was post op, how would I see my health change in addition to my weight? Maybe these questions aren't uncommon, but my doctor told me he was proud of me for thinking about things other than inches lost as a result of this surgery.

What made you finally decide to have the surgery?

My final decision was based on one thing. Die trying, or just die. I saw my overall health slipping away from me at the age of 32. I wouldn't go down without trying something. I had lost my mother at age 40 from a brain hemmorage which the doctors attributed to a possible birth defect which was something to do with AVM (I think) or Arterial/veinous Malformation. Basically, they said that where her blood vessels connected in her brain there was a weak spot and that I could likely have the same thing. I thought about it, and the fact that my doctors told me that my blood pressure was so high I could have a stroke with any increase in my blood pressure. I realized IF I did have that same malformation in my head I could be facing death if I went without the surgery. I could be facing death if I went without surgery and had a stroke, I could be facing death if I had a heart attack as a result of the hypertension. Why the hell wouldn't I attempt to save myself? So... I decided.. die.. or die trying! I chose to try.

How did you decide which proceedure to have?

I had a gallbladder removal by laproscopic surgery about 2 yrs prior, and had relatively little pain, so I wanted to have this surgery done laproscopically also. Granted.. WAY different pain after, but still a good decision in my eyes. I had a quick recovery and was up and around within a decent amount of time.

What fears did you have about having complications or even dying from from the surgery, and what would you tell other people having the same fears now?

My fears didn't really stem from having the surgery. My fears stemmed from what would happen to me if I didn't have this surgery. I, of course, knew the risks and complications which might occur as a result of this surgery, but I felt that they were within reason and my expectations of this surgery weren't to become a supermodel, I only wanted to be able to maintain my health. If you are chosing this surgery and your only issue is your appearance, I would suggest you look at the risks strongly. If your approach to this surgery is to gain something in your health, study the risks of both your health concerns if left untreated, opposed to what risks are attached to this surgery. Ask lots of questions of the surgeons, your family doctors and get on a website support group as soon as possible.

How did your family and friends react to your decision? Would you have communicated anything differently if you could now? How supportive were they after your surgery?

I wish I could say I had support when I approached my family, but I have to be honest. I went home from my appointment with my PCP who hit me with the "is losing weight worth dying for?" question full of emotion and fear. I told my husband that she told me this was my only option in her eyes to lose weight without increasing my immediate risk for stroke/heart attack, etc., and his initial response to me was "If you want to lose weight you need to get off your ass and get in the gym." He was totally unsupporting to the fact that a medically trained person had advised against raising my blood pressure by attempting to do cardio exercises. He thought I was lazy.. which yes.. I was, but I was trying my hardest at this point to follow medical advice now that I'd taken the Ephedra based drugs and had such an adverse reaction. Before taking the Ephedra, I'd never had blood pressure problems, so I can't attribute my struggles with weight all my life to not being able to work out. He was right that I should have exercised prior to this point and not attempted to "take the easy way out" by using a drug to help. He was totally unsupportive though of my decision to have the surgery. I went to all of my appointments alone, and even scheduled my surgery so that my other family would be able to take me. At the last minute, he agreed to take me to the surgery out of guilt I think, but needless to say, his lack of support opened my eyes and prior to surgery I had told him I wanted a divorce due to many other issues in our marriage. The rest of my family, friends, co-workers couldn't have been more supportive. I have nothing but positive people in my life now.

What was your stay in the hospital like? How long where you there? What things are most important to bring?

My stay in the hospital was uncomfortable at first. The most painful things are throat pain from having the tubes down your nose and throat. I hurt from the incisions, but I was able to get up and down with help as early as the first night. The more I moved and continued to get up and down, the less it hurt. I was in he hospital 3 days. The most important things to bring are some sort of sugar free hard candies to help keep your throat moist so you can tolerate having the NG tube down your nose and down your throat the first days. I also suggest calming CD's and a CD player so you can attempt to rest. The ability to sleep was difficult, I'm not a back sleeper and I couldn't get any rest at first.

Did you have any complications from the surgery? If so, how did you deal with them?

I had no complications related to my surgery. I hurt as I expected to, I recovered quicker actually than I thought I would.

In the weeks after you got your surgery date, how did you feel? How did you cope with any anxiety you might have felt?

My biggest fears after I returned from surgery was how to deal with moving out of my house with my husband and into my own place while I healed from surgery. I'd made the decision to divorce, and both of us agreed it was for the best. We maintained some sense of civility with one another, as I moved out, but I may have attempted to put to much on myself. I moved all of my belongings, packed and fixed up a rental all during the first 6 weeks post op. I was afraid I was going to cause a hernia, so I tried to take it easy, but I was determined that my whole life might as well start over at the same time. I was afraid that my decision to have surgery would be responded to in the same way my husband had by others. I feared telling anyone "how" I was losing weight, so I started justifying my decision to have surgery by telling everyone about how my doctors told me I had to. I eventually got over that, and now just tell everyone that I had surgery. I still have anxiety about acceptance, but no more than I did as an overweight person.

Describe your first few weeks home from the hospital. What should people expect from this period?

In the first weeks home, expect to be sore, expect to be afraid to eat. I worried so much that I would overeat, or that I'd have the "dumping syndrome" that they'd described to me that I was cautious about everything I attempted to eat. I had very few problems with foods. I had some troubles digesting hard proteins after I tried to introduce them into my diet. Seems that chicken was very difficult to reintroduce to my diet. Everytime I tried to eat chicken, and in the beginning hamburger, I would wind up vomitting. I soon found alternatives to my protein intake and my body started getting used to digesting beans and tuna, and eventually I was able to work my way up to chicken and steak again.

How far did you travel to have your surgery? (If far, how did this affect your aftercare?)

My surgeon is about 45 miles from my home.

Please describe in detail what things you could and couldn't eat in the weeks and months following surgery. What foods have been off limits? Please explain how your dietary tolerance changed week-by-week, and then month-by-month since surgery.

In the weeks immediately following surgery, I'd attempted to eat baby food as a "convenience" factor. I thought that it would be easier than trying to puree foods myself. Although it was easier, I would seriouslly suggest to baby food manufacturers everywhere to improve the taste... it's no wonder babies throw up. I wasn't able to stand the baby food for long, and worked my way toward eating softer foods that were easy to mash on my plate. I tried the tiny spoon and fork theory that was suggested by others on the web sites, but honestly I think that did very little for my intake reduction. I was able to eat slowly and chew thoroughly using normal utensils. As far as dietary tolerances. I learned fast that you don't eat quickly, you chew A LOT, and you can't push your new pouch to digest things it isn't ready to. I couldn't tolerate hamburger at first, which I thought would be easier to digest due to the ground up factor. I was probably 5 months post op before I could tolerate hamburger or chicken at all. Since the time I passed my 6 month mark, I'd say I can eat anything I want, in moderation. I found I was able to tolerate sugar (scary). I have to watch myself and my urges to indulge in a bite of something here and there. I just keep thinking, did you go through all this to screw it up now and I usually control my urges pretty well.

What was your actvity level in the days and weeks after surgery?

My activity level actually increased drastically post op. By 5 weeks post op, I was easily performing exercises and able to do anything I had the energy to do.

What vitamins and/or dietary supplements have you taken since your surgery?

My dietician suggested liquid vitamins or chewables in the beginning just to ease with pouch absorption. I had no problems taking chewables and calcium chews in the beginning. Since about 6 weeks post op, I've also taken a B-12 sublingual to increase my energy level. My dietician and surgeon didn't suggest protein supplements as many doctors do, but I tried to monitor my protein intake closely and I did notice that I had hair loss. I wish I'd have been able to tolerate the protein drinks a little better than I could immediately post op, but when I tried them I had such a distended and full feeling that I would hurt. I eventually stopped taking the supplement protein and watched my dietary intake more. Now, I take the One-a-Day Weight Smart capsule, B-12, Biotin, and calcium daily.

What side effects (nausea, vomiting, sleep disturbace, dumping, hair loss etc.) were worse for you? For how long after surgery did they persist? How did you cope with them?

In the first 3 months post op, I had occasional pain and vomitting. I attribute most of that to either eating too fast, or attempting to move to a harder to digest food faster than my body wanted to. I did experience hair loss. My hair is fine and I noticed the hair loss I think moreso than most. I started taking biotin at the suggestion of my hairdresser who has worked with a few other bypass patients. She also suggested other hair styles to mask the thinning and now that I'm 9 months post op I can see the hair starting to come back in.

What was the worst part about the entire bariatric surgery process?

Hmm, the worst part of the entire process, I guess would be losing all my bad habits. I have had to seriously re-learn nutritional information and exercise techniques. I take my surgery very serious, although I am horrible about sticking to any routine. I set goals for myself and then something will come up, and I have to change my schedule at work or home, and I tend to skip days at the gym. I need to be more focused and organized about going.

What aftercare support group/program do you have? How helpful/important is this?

I meet with my dietician about every 45 days. She keeps me on track as to portion size and dietary needs. Other than that, I've got a few friends at work who support me in my post op care, but I do not have an official support group to which I belong.

What is your scar like? Is this what you expected?

I have 5 tiny incisions where they did the lap, and one that is a little larger where I had the JP drain. Overall, they've faded nicely. I didn't plan on being a bikini model, so I'm not expecting perfection.

Please describe any plateau experiences you have had since surgery.

I hit a plateau at approximately 3 months. I increased my water intake and walked a little more each day and overcame that plateau within a few weeks. I am currently on another plateau. I've not lost much weight over the last 2 months. I believe I've only lost 6 pounds in the last 45 days, so although it hasn't stopped completely, I'd consider this a plateau. I am meeting with a personal trainer at my gym next week to see if I can increase my routine in any way to promote more weight loss.

Do you notice people treating you any differently now?

LORD, do they. I now have people who approach me to introduce themselves who I've known for years. I smile graciously and love every minute of it. I also find that I'm not discriminated against or maybe ridiculed as much is a better way to say that. I remember feeling ashamed and guilty about my weight for so many years that now I still hold on to those fears but I hope that my self-image will continue to change as I accept my new body.