How did you first find out about bariatric surgery and what were your initial impressions of it?

My mother had the old-style "stomach stapling" back in the 80's sometime, and after her initial brief period of success, the staples seemed to disappear, and aside from getting food hung up in her system sometimes, there seemed to be no permanent change. She was also very much an impulsive and emotional eater, much more than I ever was, so I guess she just resigned herself to an overweight lifestyle. By the way, my parents passed away from complications of obesity and type II diabetes when I was only in my mid-30s. I never saw them exercise or enjoy their bodies one day in my life. I didn't want to have the same future.

Describe your experience with getting insurance approval for surgery. What advice, if any, do you have for other people in this stage?

Well, it helps to have the right insurance company. Once I finally got a job that had an insurer that was open to the idea of paying for bariatric surgery (the first one flat-out had a policy against it), getting into the right program and having them do the work was my secret to success. I didn't have to do much except participate in the appointments that were required to "jump through the hoops" of the process.

What was your first visit with your surgeon like? How can people get the most out of this meeting?

Do your research! Know what you want before you get there, and have appropriate questions. This is not the time to start getting a clue. This is the time to tweak your well-researched ideas. My surgeon was awesome. Too bad he is the surgical administrator now and no longer doing WLS. He is so sweet and also (bonus!) EXTREMELY good-looking. When I was in my post-op morphine haze I thought he was coming from heaven to get me, even though I'm not religious at all. Ha!!! That was really funny. He must have thought I was a complete lunatic.

What made you finally decide to have the surgery?

Dead parents (Type II diabetes, as mentioned elsewhere in these answers) who never had normal-weight bodies that they could enjoy. I want too much out of life to live a lifestyle with a body that doesn't want to go anywhere or do anything active.

How did you decide which proceedure to have?

In the 90s had the old-style stapling that didn't work, and so did my mother. I knew I wanted the tried-and-true RNY and I wasn't going to monkey with any other types.

What fears did you have about having complications or even dying from from the surgery, and what would you tell other people having the same fears now?

I thought about it, especially since I had a friend who died from the surgery. She died right on the operating table. I just decided that I would rather chance it than go on with my overweight self forever, and I knew from all my efforts that those were my two realistic options. I also knew that I would only become more high risk as I got older, so there was no reason to procrastinate. I wanted to start living my life that I was dreaming about, and now I am. I don't often give much weight to my fears. I treat fear as a warning sign but not as a stop sign. I go past fears all the time. I don't believe in viewing life from a point of fear. I believe in being brave and living life to the fullest, no matter how hard that might seem at times.

How did your family and friends react to your decision? Would you have communicated anything differently if you could now? How supportive were they after your surgery?

Everyone was supportive. Nobody gave me any grief. It would have fallen on deaf ears, anyhow, because my mind was made up. They were supportive after surgery.

How did your employer/supervisor react to your decision? What did you tell him/her? How long were you out of work?

I shot up our insurance rates. He had never had a major claim like that, and he only has two employees. That part is bad. He is, however, supportive of my changes and all my marathon training. He came to see me run my first marathon. I missed 4 weeks (possibly more) due to my re-admittance from complications the day after I went back to work.

What was your stay in the hospital like? How long where you there? What things are most important to bring?

My stay was fine the first time - ended up in a private room. Uneventful - just hung out with the TV. I had a roommate when I had to be readmitted for complications (septic shock from a leak- really bad time) and I wanted to kill this woman's family. On my readmittance 9 days post-op, I was put on only water and apple juice for a week (not even broth or jello were allowed because of the protein or fat), and was so sick, weak, hungry, and miserable! I never knew hunger like that before. It was incredible and made me have crazy thoughts and emotions. That roommate of mine was innediately post-op from WLS, but her sister kept showing up with things like friend chicken from KFC and stunk up our room with food odors. I went ballistic and threatened to catch her and kill her after she did this twice. Needless to say, the nursing staff kicked her out of our room until she learned to behave herself and not be such an imbecile. Oh, and the most important things to bring are deodorant, tampons (why do you get your period in the hospital even when it's not time for it?!?! so not fair!!!), cute LOOSE pjs, sugarless gum, a robe, some magazines (no attention span for a book) and comfortable slippers that you can put on without bending over.

Did you have any complications from the surgery? If so, how did you deal with them?

Yes, septic shock, 9 days post-op, as mentioned above. It was horrible but didn't kill me. They didn't open me up, but I had to drink that foul-tasting clear "nuclear waste" and have scans done almost every day for a couple of weeks until the hole sealed itself up. It was amazing how sick and weak I was just from a simple tiny little self-contained leak. I was so weak when I arrived in the emergency room that I didn't have the energy to stay seated and wait in a chair, so I laid down in the floor until they went to find me a stretcher. Finding me in the floor got their attention. I never realized how much effort and muscle exertion it took to simply sit in a chair! I looked normal and didn't have horrible vital signs, so I didn't cause the emergency staff to panic like they were panicking over the heart-attack and gunshot patients. I was a little overlooked until they found me in the floor. Oh, and by the way, the nursing phone line (I called them when I first started feeling badly the night before going in the ER), the emergency staff, and even the surgery staff didn't believe I had a leak since I was already 9 days out and didn't have any abdominal pain. My only symptoms were rapid pulse, rapid breathing, extreme unbelievable fatigue (almost felt comatose due to fatigue - couldn't even walk by myself), and a fever. I had NO abdominal pain whatsoever. Apparently this is not the norm, and was the first time they had seen it, and it took them hours of scans to figure it out. It was a small leak and therefore quite difficult to see from most angles in the scans, apparently.

In the weeks after you got your surgery date, how did you feel? How did you cope with any anxiety you might have felt?

I felt great. I was nervous, but felt relieved. Wasn't looking forward to being cut wide open, but was really looking forward to the end result and my new life. I ate too many "last meals" for sure. My BMI was barely within the range, so they threatened me to not lose weight before surgery, or else I could have problems with insurance.

Describe your first few weeks home from the hospital. What should people expect from this period?

Except for the unusual complication I had, I don't remember anything being particularly eventful. Having the staples out didn't hurt, and surprisingly enough, the incision itself didn't hurt too much, either, after the first couple of days.

How far did you travel to have your surgery? (If far, how did this affect your aftercare?)

I live 3 miles from the hospital.

Please describe in detail what things you could and couldn't eat in the weeks and months following surgery. What foods have been off limits? Please explain how your dietary tolerance changed week-by-week, and then month-by-month since surgery.

I don't remember the details then, but now, I just avoid too much sugar and any overly carb-heavy stuff, especially in the morning. I eat organic food and lots of veggies. I have a good diet and there are no foods that I can't eat, except if I eat too much of them or eat them in the morning. I can eat smaller amounts of sugar later in the day along with other foods.

What was your actvity level in the days and weeks after surgery?

Not much activity due to the infection. I was a zombie for a month and a half at least.

What vitamins and/or dietary supplements have you taken since your surgery?

I have serious iron and B-12 deficiency. I give myself B-12 shots every two weeks and pop iron several times per day. I think I am within normal range now. Not quite time to retest. I ran my first marathon with anemia! Wow I must have really trained well! I ran it before I knew that I had bad iron problems. Athletes tend to have iron issues, anyway, so I might have had that even without WLS.

What side effects (nausea, vomiting, sleep disturbace, dumping, hair loss etc.) were worse for you? For how long after surgery did they persist? How did you cope with them?

No nausea really, no vomiting, no sleep disturbances, dumping only when I deserve it (eating cereal in the morning - too many carbs!) I used to be a hairstylist, so when my hair got thin in front, I put in a few highlights (to make it lighter and thus more scalp-colored and textured-looking) and changed my style. I stopped wearing my hair curly and fuller on top and started slicking it more to the side. It was cute and nobody noticed it was a high-tech comb-over! For all you people who are not used to spending money on your personal appearance, please heed my advice and you will be happy: Go see a GOOD stylist. Great Clips, Master Cuts, or JC Penney doesn't count. Fork over the money and do it. Go to an experienced stylist at an independent salon or a fancy chain. Price matters when it comes to haircuts and color. She can help you get past the thin-hair stage with style and confidence. You WILL have to change your hairstyle, so get with the program and get out of your rut! Your new body deserves new hair. I repeat: SPEND THE MOOLAH AND GET A REAL HAIRSTYLIST!

What was the worst part about the entire bariatric surgery process?

Staying in a room with another person. The person (they changed - I was there for awhile with my infection) was OK, but having their families around really was awful. They were noisy, smelly (food, BO, perfume, smoke, etc and I was extremely sensitive to odors when I was sick), and generally in my way. They would use our bathroom and mess it up. I got so sick of their being around. When I agreed to save money (insurance doesn't pay for the private room charge), I forgot about the roommate's family being all over the place disturbing my peace. I had only thought about the roommate herself.

What aftercare support group/program do you have? How helpful/important is this?

The support group bugged me because the people in it had such poor knowledge of nutrition that they didn't even understand the difference between a carb of cake and a carb of broccoli. I have a science and nutrition background, so it was really hard to participate without getting frustrated. I ended up going to a different group for a couple of sessions and doing a lot of things online. I probably need to find another group now that I am 2-years post-op and still have the stupid 25 lb. tummy area to lose. It's not getting bigger (yippee!!!) but it's not getting smaller, either, even with all my marathon training. Yes, I now run marathons! I have done two and am signed up for two more. And no, the tummy problem is not all loose skin...there is fat in there, too, that I need to lose.

What is your scar like? Is this what you expected?

It is from my sternum down to my navel. It is what I expected. I had previous abdominal surgery and they followed that scar line. It isn't any bigger than it was after my first surgery, so I am fine with it. It's not like I'm planning on wearing bikinis around, anyway, so why should I care? A little helpful tip for some who don't understand the truth about losing large amounts of weight: ***Just because I'm now small doesn't make me a swimsuit model!***

Please describe any plateau experiences you have had since surgery.

I had to kick it into high gear after the first 50 lbs, and now am stuck with 25 more to go. I am an exercise-a-holic (marathon runner, as mentioned before), so I have decided that maybe it is here to stay. I will be having a tummy tuck in a couple of months, so much of it will probably go then. I am going to find an aggressive surgeon who will take off all s/he can.

Do you notice people treating you any differently now?

Yes, everyone treats me differently now. My high school reunion back home 1100 miles away was surreal - I had to introduce myself to people I spent half my life with! The general public responds to me differently, and women as well as men interact with me in a more friendly way. I chalk half of this up to my new-found perceptions of myself as a "normal" person with style and self-confidence, and can't give all the credit to everyone else. I approach the world in a less adversarial way. I like more types of people now.