Question:
What would you do? developing crush

I'm kind of developing a crush on this guy, which i first notice when i realize he stares at me, my confidence it's growing but i don't know if i should make a move or not, my friends swear he's very interested but i'm not so sure i like him, but what if it turns out not to be interested, i don't know how would i take that. So the question is, do I or don't I? There's a time frame here, since we're in the same school but he only has 3 more months to graduate.    — iaheel (posted on June 2, 2005)

June 1, 2005
You can sure start with an eye contact..and then a hello. if he starting any conversation go with it. if not you can always mention something like "you must be so excited that you graduate in 3 months" "have you desided what you want to do next? a simply conversation could start somthing going. all the best! Tracey
   — traceybubbles

June 1, 2005
Don't go into it with the expectation to gain a 'boyriend'. Go into it with the thought and desire to make a new friend. If something else develops then that's great. If not, then you've gained a friendship that will probably last. Hope this helps
   — Tanya G.

June 2, 2005
Pilar, Yes you could get hurt and disappointed but isn't it worth it to find out if there is something more. You took a chance to change your life 7 months ago and look how far you've come. All you have to put out there is a conversation to find out if there is something there or not. Say hello introduce yourself tell him you've seen him around. The worst that could happen is you decide that you really aren't interested after all. This is your new life make it everything it's meant to be. Good luck with everything. Denise
   — dlryanoates

June 3, 2005
Pilar, pay attention to your intuitive, your "gut" reaction. If "you're not sure [you] like him," don't act as if you "have to" make ANY overtures to him. It's kinda like getting used to the fact that in "normal" -sized bodies, we can CHOOSE clothes we're attracted to, not select from the limited supply of what's offered in our plus size. Part of learning to thrive in your new body is developing a personality and behaviors that are every bit as healthy, energized and self-affirming as your body is. You can relate to this guy in a friendly, classmate-way and see if he cares enough and has the self-confidence to make his intentions known. Also, staring IS aggressive behavior in ALL primates - including humans. You can tell him how you feel about being stared at & see what's behind that. Now for the REALLY IMPORTANT QUESTION: When're you going to post some "before" and "after" photos on your Profile site? <LOL> All the best, Lauralyn
   — EmbodySuccess

June 3, 2005

   — iaheel

June 3, 2005
Just talk to him like you would any friend. Like someone else said, talk to him about his upcoming graduation, what's he going to do next, stuff like that. No flirty, romancy type stuff. Just friendly talk. I don't know if that's hard for you. Maybe you're a little shy in social situations, especially with a cute guy that you're attracted to. I don't have problems with talking to people. My husband says I could carry on a conversation with a fence post. But anyway, that's what I'd do. Just talk with him and be friendly, you'll get a feel for how the situation is that way I think. Maybe you'll find you've got another friend and nothing more and maybe that will be fine with both of you? Who knows? If you do nothing, you'll never know. Lynda D.
   — Lynda D.

June 5, 2005
I thought this was a forum for weight loss issues, not for Dear Abby questions. Please keep your questions relevant
   — Harry King

June 7, 2005

   — aprilbaree

June 9, 2005
Hi there, I say go for it! What's the worst that could happen? He will say no he doesn't want to go out with you. You will get over it. If you don't try you will never know. You could end up with a good friend either way. There's also this thing I learned called the rejection ratio. Maybe 1 out of 10 (or even 20) men may want to go out with me. How do I know which ones? I can try every man that interests me and each time one says no, I don't think of it as a failure, I think of it as a success. It is one more closer to the one who will say yes. Because I know 1 in 10 will say yes. So if I get 6 nos then I can be happy that I am that much closer to a yes. This is stating it very simply, but that is the rejection ratio! Good luck. Cathy
   — catleth

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