Question:
Pressure to have surgery

I work with a MO man, and I am hoping he doesn't feel any undue pressure to have WLS since I am...I guess that probably sounds strange, but do you think "people" will assume he will be doing it now too? Did you feel any pressure to lose weight when others around you were? Diva    — Princess D. (posted on January 17, 2003)

January 16, 2003
When I decided to have surgery, my husband jumped in that he wanted it too. I tried to talk him out of it because I thought he wasn't ready, his obesity did bother him, his health was good and he likes food to much. I didn't think he would be able to give up his trips to the 6 donuts. I figured he would out eat the surgery.. we had it 15 months ago. He doesn't follow the rules as he should, but is doing enough that his weight and health is good. Having the surgery together worked out beautifully. As to what other people expect of him. So what. LOL
   — faybay

January 16, 2003
I was gun ho lets get WLS. Jen was reluctant at best. I had surgery and Jens detoriating health got her to do it too. Now Jens dad is getting it, although he is only in the beginning of his journey.
   — bob-haller

January 17, 2003
When I told my two best friends I was going to have this surgery, once the shock worn off...one of them said she was thinking about it too...but must wait until the birth of her next child in July 2003...the other isn't large enough and doesn't have any problems...but wishes she could have it too rather then working out (Which was really bad...so I explained to her how if she CAN loose the weight on her own, that's what she should do...that I am only doing this because I CAN'T!!!) Sigh. I was pressured to work out with the ladies I used to work with, even though there was much pain involved because they made me feel like crap for not joining them at the gym. I eventually told them I couldn't do it anymore. Then shortly after, I was let go.
   — Renee B.

January 17, 2003
Pre-op, I was always feeling the pressure, or should I say, guilt, to lose weight. My husband, my parents, siblings were all honest in telling me I had gained too much weight and should try to lose it. This in addition to the internal guilt/pressure every time I looked in the mirror, praying for the strength to gear up for one more diet try. And then add to it those you work with or friends who just happened to lose 20 or 30 pounds and wanted to share this info with you...yes, more pressure/guilt. But not knowing this gentleman that you work with, I can't say how he feels. As you lose weight though, I would try hard to be very tactful around him and not gloat or rave about your loss in front of him. Perhaps your success will intrigue him enough to check into it on his own.
   — Cindy R.

January 17, 2003
Thanks for your replies, it's appreciated. I know I will need to be as sensitive as posible and prehapes I can help my coworker in some way.
   — Princess D.