Question:
How do I remain calm?

I am 17 days away from my surgery. I cleaned my house today in preparation (it will need a touch up soon though). I cleared my self a bit of counter space and will by some shelves this weekend so I can keep all my food and protein supplies seperate from the other food (Ie, the junk my husband eats...out of sight, out of mind). I plan to pack my bag this weekend for the hospital (after buying new underware). But I'm getting nervous. Not eating, not sleeping, not able to focus on anything but this surgery. I am postive that this is a good thing for me too do and not worried about my choice...just stupid things...like will I get to the hosptial on time? Will my mom be ok to watch my son for a day? Will my husband leave the toliet seat up and my mother fall in? Yeah, it sounds silly but its got me worried. I am trying to breathe, trying to distract myself but I can't. I don't want to watch tv because I hate tv, going outside with my son is fun but it allows my mind time to think about surgery...I can't focus enough to read or study or to do my homework. I try to force myself...I've got my last midterm tomorrow for my hardest class and I just can't get it together enough to study...or to even care whether I pass or fail.    — Renee B. (posted on October 25, 2003)


October 25, 2003
Could you go out with your hubby? How about a trip to the library? Get caught in a good book... Carney Wilson has a couple books out, and there are a few others... Maybe you could go to a museum, some sort of fall fests etc? I live in KC, Mo so there's lots to do... I just hope you can keep your mind from worrying, becasue surely in the end it'll all be okay... I know it's so hard not to worry... I fiond myself wondering what I'd do even if something went wrong... but it'll be fine...sending good vibes your way...
   — MF

October 25, 2003
i know it is hard to remain clam and focused....just remember, you are doing a good and wonderful thing for you and your family. and it never helps to say a paryer. good luck and congrats. melinda, largo fl 1wk post op lap rny
   — melindainfla

October 25, 2003
Indeed it is hard to think about anything else but your surgery, I love the idea of trying to go out and do something with your family, that might take your mind off of it. I was the same was before my surgery, I cannot beleive it has already been one month today! You will do fantastic & everyone will be fine while you are in the hospital! GOOD LUCK!
   — Saxbyd

October 25, 2003
<b>You sound normal to me. LOL I think we all have gone through this also. We are preparing ourself for what's ahead. The wait is so longggggggg LOL But your big day will be here before you realize it. God Bless you in every step you take.</b>
   — Naes Wls J.

October 25, 2003
renee! you are so close! you always have such positive words for everyone- you will be fine!maybe a long hot bubbly bath?????? some soft music?????good luck on your midterm---keep breathing-deep...deep...and smile! you are on a wonderful rollercoaster ride and i'm jealous !
   — Margo M.

October 25, 2003
The one anxiety that I faced before surgery was the uncertainty of how I would live a life without food as its centerpiece. What helped to ease that anxiety was rehearing my surgeon's guiding advice that the surgery was only the start of a life-long process of living a long and healthy life. As a result, I was able to kind of focus on the more mundate tasks of everyday life as I got close to my surgery date as I felt in my heart that I be up and about soon after the operation; although, as the primary care-giver in our family for our daughters, I knew that lots of tasks faced me after I got home from the hospital. Everyone gets nervous--- I left a "just-in-case" note for my wife and sent a copy of it to my friend who is an attorney (along with directions for what I would want for my last rites). But those more general what-if-the-surgery-goes-wrong and how-will-I-deal-with-the-pain concerns were best resolved in me by appreciating that I had a great surgeon who was truly concerned about my well-being, loving friends and family who would help me in my recovery (both from the surgery and in beating my addiction to food) and a faith in God who I believed would be there to protect me. The collective experiences you will find on this site will also help you find some inner peace and focus as you near your surgery date. Good luck.
   — SteveColarossi

October 26, 2003
Try a relaxation before surgery tape. I did and it really helped. I was so calm going into surgery and they didn't give me anything to relax me before.
   — cat5dog1

October 26, 2003
Renee, Honey, you are so normal. I had surgery 3 months ago and remember all of those thoughts and feelings. I don't know if you are religious or not, but for me it helped to get out in nature somewhere I liked and just sit and breathe. I prayed and asked God to give me peace etc. It did wonders for me. Talking with friends also helped. I had a lot of support. If you are not religious, then do the same thing, just meditate somewhere out in nature, watch the sun set while thinking positively about how great your life is going to be. Allow yourself to feel thanks for this opportunity and journal about how you want life to be better, what kinds of things you will do or wear after you are healthier and a HOT MAMMA! These are positive outlets instead of all the worry. The world at home will continue to survive without you for a while. Maybe not as smoothly, but this is YOUR time. Stop, breathe, and smile. Good Luck!
   — Michele B.

October 26, 2003
I have to agree with the other poster. I used a book and tape called "Prepare for Surgery, Heal Faster". The tape was a deep relaxation tape and it really helped me. Good luck!!!
   — Morna B.

October 26, 2003
I know it's hard, but try to relax, if that doesn't help talk to your doctor. I have about 6 weeks before my surgery and I was already having quite a bit of anxiety which led me hardly eat or sleep for 5 days, well, after 5 days lack of sleep and eating caught up with me and I literally felt like I could pass out at any time.. Don't let it get that far. If it is gone beyond just being nervous (not eating/sleeping for days) see if they will give you something for it. (my doc gave me Xanax to take) Take Care of yourself!!
   — Patricia T.




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