Question:
How can one prepare themselves mentally for the change in eating habits.

Presently: 287lbs. 5'5. I'm going to one of the seminars Monday. I'm still doing my research on finding the right doctor and which procedure is right for me. After speaking with people who have had the surgery, the've said it's more of a mental challenge than anything. What all have you done before and after the surgery to help deal with the change of eating habits? What about the excess skin, is surgery a must to remove it?    — Adrienne Harris (posted on October 9, 2004)

October 9, 2004
Adrienne, for me, it has been a mental challenge but I actually started working on the mental challenges long before I had the surgery when I realized that I was getting sicker and sicker and was headed toward a slow, miserable death. I went to counseling and did a LOT of self examination to see why I ate the way I did. I was pretty successful in resolving a lot of emotional issues but by that point, I had to struggle to lose a pound so I didn't make much progress on my weight. The biggest help to me was when I tried the Atkins diet and realized that once I got the carb demon off my back, I could be pretty successful in at least maintaining my weight. I'm just a bit over a year out and have only "lost control" about twice since surgery and that consisted of eating about 300 extra calories over a day's time so it wasn't too bad. I haven't tried sugar at all, I just assume it will make me sick. I'd rather not know if it doesn't and that would be my advice to you...just plan to never test it. Fortunately, the highly refined foods like white bread make me feel like crap so it's been pretty easy to leave that alone. I was the champion bread eater of all time before I went on the Atkins plan in late 2002. I did faithfully attend a support group pre-op and early post-op. It's been hard to get there over the last three or four months (lots going on personally) but I still try to make it as frequently as I can and I check the questions and answers on this web site everyday. I guess the best advice I could give would be that you internalize now that your eating habits will be different for the rest of your life. That doesn't mean you will be deprived for the rest of your life but that you will have to have a good plan that starts with protein first, then veggies, then fruit and rarely if ever, the high glycemic stuff like white flour. And drink, drink, drink 'til you're sick of drinking. That has been the hardest part for me, not the change in eating habits. As far as the surgery for excess skin, that is a very individual thing as well. It depends on your skin tone, genetics, etc., etc. Not much help I know but you really won't know until you get close. I started out at 276, am down to 151 and, although I could use some tightening up, I could really go without any surgery at all because mine isn't so bad. For me, it would definitely be a vanity thing. No way to tell what you'll experience but that's part of the beauty of this journey. Good luck on your research and hope everything works out well for you.
   — scbabe

October 9, 2004
Although I didn't think so at the time, the physician supervised diet I had to do before getting insurance approval did actually get me into a mindset of changing my eating habits. My doctor had me do a 1600 calorie per day diet and to track every bite of food that went into my mouth. It's kind of revealing when you see it on paper and it taught me to look at the nutrition content of what I was eating. It taught me to read the labels and count the calories. I've found now a little over 2 years out as long as I stay in the neighborhood of 1200 calories, I maintain pretty well, which is what I must do for life. I discovered what a demon carbs are for me and I don't indulge much in that dept. any more. I've learned to control my blood sugar drops that I've had for years and didn't ever get a handle on and best of all most of my medical problems are gone. If I'm tempted to slip, all I have to do is to re-visit all the pain I was in as a pre-op. Makes one think twice.
   — Cathy S.

October 10, 2004
The mental challenge isn't limited to just your eating habits. The first couple of months are difficult because you are learning what you can and can not eat and how much. But after that it becomes 'old hat' till about two years out. There is nothing I could have done to prepare me for any of the mental challenges that I faced. <br><br>The first couple of months where you are faced with the realization of why and how much you actually eat is quite the eye opener. You will not only miss foods that you can't eat, but even though you are full, will still miss eating the volume. That one was a shocker to me. Thankfully all that goes away. After you try bread and it sits in your stomach like a rock and you feel miserable for an hour or two....you just don't want it every again. Same with sweets and whatever else it is that YOUR stomach doesn't like. Your cravings do go away through behavior modification. Bread and sweets make you feel like crap...you don't crave them.<br><br>The biggest mental challenge for me was dealing with the new found confidence. This sounds stupid, but it is actually weird. Dealing with attention was difficult. After the weight is gone from you body, it is still in your head. You look beautiful, but still feel fat. Why is that man looking at me? Oh my god, he is walking over here!!! It takes about two or so years for your mind to catch up. Then your in a size 10 and feel fat. What the hell is that about? Enter questioning your entire life....Is my job good enough, my spouse, my education, my closet...etc. <br><br>excess skin is more of an annoyance than a life altering event for me. I am three years out and have not had PS. I have the jiggly belly and the upper thigh shake, but it really isn't as bad as it could have been. It would be nice to have PS, but it is by no means necessary for me, for others it is. Completely depends on your body and you won't know until you have lost all weight. Anyhow, the mental challenge is not limited to eating habits. It is present in ALL aspects of your life after surgery. Being informed that the challenges are there is the best thing, and sadly something that most people don't realize. ~~Rebecca
   — RebeccaP

October 10, 2004
Rebecca is correct. I help run a support group and I aways recommend that any one concerning this surgery think about seeking counceling before and after surgery. We used food to mask our feeling and cover life issues. Once you have the surgery you can't use food to do that so you need to develop coping skills besides food. The surgery is just a DIET TOOL. During the recovery you need to develop good eating habits (what you eat, where you eat, how you eat). We have to turn around old eating habits so we don't go back to old habits which can happen. If you abuse the tool (new stomach) it will expand and you can gain weight. Think about regular diets... if they worked why are people still fat. The diet programs may be good but its the emotional part that diets like Weight Watchers, Atkins, etc have not master and never will. You can start preparing for this surgery in a couple of ways. Join a support group (good to talk to others), exercise (start building muscle tone), eating protein (helps with the healing process), seeing a dietitian before the surgery (can give you ideas of the correct protein, reading labels, etc). Please read the profiles on this site. You can e-mail me. I will be happy to share my story. I was 329 lbs before the surgery, I'm 18 months post-op and currently at 138 lbs. I am having PS only because I'm having a difficult time sitting with the extra skin I have. Most insurances may not pay for PS so please keep this in mind. They pay for the Bypass for health reasons but they think PS is cosmetic. Find out from your insurance company ahead of time so that if they don't you can start saving if you think your going to need PS. It's a nice to have but not necessary. Good Luck.
   — Linda R.

October 11, 2004
The greatest challenge is mental. Losing weight is very easy compared to the emotional stuff. If you eat to hide your emotions you will have to find another way to deal with them.
   — mrsmyranow