Question:
Has anyone been alone during their post-op recovery?
I have to travel an hour and a half south to San Diego for surgery and will be staying in a hotel post-op. My fiance and family members are unable to get off of work to join me in San Diego. This would mean I'd be alone in the hotel room for the majority of the days I am required to stay in the area post-surgery. Has anyone else done this? Is it safe? Should I put off surgery until someone can join me in San Diego? — jenpatalano (posted on June 3, 2003)
June 2, 2003
Hi Jennifer,
Sorry that you are having to go through this alone. I travelled from MD
to NY for my surgery and it was fine. Are you having open or lap? I had
my surgery done lap, was discharged 3 days post-op and had absolutely no
problem caring for myself. I would say that if you are having open you
might need some help though. Good Luck and Congrats.
— StephN1966
June 2, 2003
Hi... I would highly recommend that you find someone to go with you. You
will be very sore and have a very difficult time doing things for yourself
immediately post-op. You will NOT be able to drive for the first week or
so, and even taking a shower can make you feel weak, so you will need
someone there to help you during the first post-op days. After the first
week, you would be fine on your own, barring complications, but you should
have a back up plan just in case.
— Happy I.
June 2, 2003
I could not have gone thru being alone for the first 2 days at home. After
that I would have been fine. 2 things to remember I am a man and a big baby
;). I'm sure that you will be fine. Just a thought maybe you could arrange
for a visiting nurse for a couple days. If you have to pay for it maybe
your Dr would write you a perscription and insurance may pay for some or
all of it. Good Lux
— Robert L.
June 2, 2003
Hi, I had LAP RNY on 5/13 and was discharged on 5/14 because I was doing so
good. My husband was with me but I never needed his help. No
complications, just had a little trouble the first 2-3 days wiping while on
the toilet. I recommend getting a metal long-handled spoon to wrap the
toilet paper around to help you reach. Good luck.
— Ainsliek
June 2, 2003
I would get hotel to check on you at least a few times a day. Showering
without help would be hard, wrap body in saran wrap to protect incisions,
and being unsteady you could fall. Its funny NOW but I slept with extra
pillows to elevate my back so I could get up. Well while sleeping they
moved and I couldnt get up. I called out whale on the beach to get my wife
jens help!!! Being alone for times like this would be tough. Perhaps you
could get a angel from here to help you and provide some companionship for
the first couple days?
— bob-haller
June 2, 2003
I would have to agree, that is depend on whether you are having LAP or
OPEN. Lap you may be OK, I had OPEN, so I can only tell you from my
prospective. I was kind of alone too, my husband was there the first day I
came home, but that was it. He has school and work both F/T. My parents
called to check on me periodically. They also dropped in once a day (with
my 5 year old daughter) but theu did their support at a distance :o) I did
OK, like I said... but the first 2 days were really hard & I was glad I
at least had help the first day! Just getting down and then up from the
toilet is really hard (not to mention the wiping) LOL and the shower, I
couldn't take till my 5th day post-op, so I had my husband get one of those
medical shower things (used a lot by elderly persons, they are plastic),
you sit on while cleaning & washing your hair... makes it a little
easier. I would recommend one of those, definitely if your gonna be alone.
I couldn't drive until just yesterday, my 2 week post-op date. That might
be a problem, unless you are in walking distance to everything you need
(water, protein shakes, SF clear liquids, vitamins) or bring them all with
you... The hospital gave me these really long tongs, with plastic on the
end to help the gripers (so when I got a hold of something it wouldn't
slip) and this helped, I am and was constantly still dropping stuff on the
floor- this is a life saver to help pick up things!!! I wish you the best
of luck, in your decision! Just be prepared to not be able to do most
things you take for granted, at least the first 2 days! email me if you
have any other questions for me!
— heather S.
June 2, 2003
Hi! I had my surgery (open RNY) on a Friday at Scripps Mercy in San Diego.
My husband and I walked from the hospital that Monday when I was
discharged to the Somerset Suites which is a block away. He stayed
overnight and left early the next morning to drive to work in San Clemente.
I stayed alone from Tuesday to Friday. I had a calling card and frequently
called him, friends, and even the doctor's office twice. I managed to stay
alone with no problem. My doctors' office (Pacific Bariatrics) was within
walking distance of the hotel. I actually gained a lot of confidence by
managing by myself. Everything I wanted was within walking distance. I
had a refrigerator for my sugarfree Jello, a microwave for my herbal tea
and chicken bouillion, and a health food store nearby for my Pro-Complex
shake powder. Feel free to e-mail me if you are having surgery at Scripps
Mercy.
— Margaret S.
June 3, 2003
Instead of asking the hotel clerk to check up on you, you could see if your
insurance will cover a visiting nurse to check on you once a day for the
few days you will be there. Your surgeon would need to write the orders for
this before you are discharged from the hospital. This nurse would not be
staying with you, just checking your vital signs and incisions, breath
sounds and intake, etc. and make sure you are not developing any
complications. You would still be on your own to shower and care for
yourself. Another idea, if you have the money, (and it could be about the
same as a hotel room) is to check with assisted living facilities in the
area. Sometimes they will allow people to stay in special rooms set aside
for temporary stays, and provide some assistance. Granted, you might be a
whole lot younger than the usual person they have, but you might feel
safer, and not so alone!
— koogy
June 3, 2003
I did it by myself. I also had my surgery down in San Diego and was
required to stay in the area the following week. When I was released from
the hospital, I took a cab to the hotel (Holiday Inn). I had a pillow with
me for my tummy and the driver drove very smoothly for me. The hotel had a
wheelchair for me to get to my room. Room service delivers jello and
broth. I kept lots of water by my bedside and kept the remote control with
me. I was a little lonely but did fine. 13 months later, with 120 pounds
lost, I would do it again if I had to! Make sure when you are discharged
that they run you by the pharmacy for your pain meds. Good luck! Hugs
:o)
— Jennifer A.
June 3, 2003
I had Lap RNY on Monday and was discharged on Wed. My husband took our 3
kids to his parents in Cleveland on Wed. and stayed there with them until
late Monday night, and I was fine by myself. My surgeon said that as long
as I didn't take the pain med. for 24 hrs I could drive. (I never needed
pain meds. after I was discharged from the hosp.) I drove myself to get a
manicure and pedicure on Fri. am ,to Costco on Saturday, and to church on
Sunday. I didn't have to cook for anyone( I was only allowed jello and
chicken broth), I could nap when I wanted, it was GREAT! I didn't need or
want any help showering or wiping after going potty. If you have open , now
that's an entirely different story. Either way ~ Good Luck! Lap RNY
4-21-03 263/228/?
— plsmom
June 3, 2003
I live 3+ hours from where I'll be having surgery, and I plan to do it by
myself. I am a real tough cookie, though, and I'd much rather be left
alone to sleep, thanks to the pain meds I'm sure, than have my husband and
maybe kids hovering and worrying about me. Now, if I have to stay locally
after the surgery, I may let them come up and visit me, but my son has ADHD
and my husband can't really handle him well on trips, so my plan is to take
the Greyhound to Spokane for the surgery, and let hubby come pick me up
when its time, leaving the kids with friends. Since my son has ADHD, we
really don't have anyone we can leave him with longterm (overnight).
I've seen lots of profiles where people say they couldn't have made it
without the help of their mom, or best friend, or spouse rubbing their
feet, or fetching them drinks, etc., but everyone is different. I think if
I was a woman in South Africa (and they had epidurals in the fields), I'd
even be willing to squat and birth that baby, then get back to harvesting
like they say happens over there. Both of my deliveries, and gallbladder
surgery, D&C and hysterectomy were a breeze. Back to work within a week
of each thing (except second baby).
— bethybb
June 3, 2003
It might be a little rough if you are having open surgery but you can do
it.. In all reality it did not hurt as much as my hysterectomy.. The people
posting had a good idea though about having the hotel clerk check in on you
from time to time.. If possible you need a room with a small frig &
micriwave .. frig for sure.. You need to drink alot after & have things
like broth & s.f. jello.. Also bring some saran wrap with ypou to cover
your incision in the shower.. Good luck & remember to take it easy
& follow your doctors instructions..
— Anne T.
June 4, 2003
If you are a person who is independent and doesn't need someone to hold
your hand every step of the way, then go for it NOW. If not (not that it's
a bad thing), then you'll be better off waiting (emotionally). I did it
all alone and not a regret in the world.
good luck (7 wks out -37)
— Diane S.
June 4, 2003
I am an amputee (leg amputated) with diabetes and heart failure. I did the
post op alone at home. As long as you have medications and phone you
should do just fine.
I had my open RNY this last January. It wasn't a piece of cake but it
wasn't bad either. My hysterectomy was worse.
— Melanie H.
June 4, 2003
Thanks so much, everyone! Your answers have been infinitely helpful. It
is so reassuring to have the support of all of you brave people who've been
where I am! I believe I am going to go it alone and will be scheduling my
surgery shortly. I'd love to lose some of this pesky weight in time for my
upcoming 10 year high school reunion...blow their socks off. I won't be
completely alone as my fiance and parents live an hour and a half away and
will be able to join me over the weekend. Perhaps I can arrange for
visitors throughout the week as well. I'll be having Lap RNY so,
hopefully, I'll be able to fend for myself for the most part. Another
question...Anyone do their surgery at Alvarado in San Diego? I'd love a
hotel recommendation. Thanks again for all of your tips!
— jenpatalano
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