Question:
Does this Happen?
I feel pretty silly even asking this, but I can't be the first person to ever have this happen to them. I've recently developed a "crush" on my surgeon! While it's fun on the one hand, and COMPLETELY harmless, when I see him I get tongue-tied and forget to ask him things that I need to. I guess I'm not really asking for advice here, but I'd just like to know if it has happened to anyone else...maybe then I won't feel so dumb! — [Anonymous] (posted on July 31, 2000)
July 31, 2000
Don't worry in Phychological terms it's called transferrance and it happens
often enough that they've studied it:) But to avoid the problem of getting
tongue tied and forgetting to ask questions...Write them Down, before your
next appt and read the questions off your paper. This is a good idea even
if you don't have a "Crush". Because you can get side tracked by
your conversation with your doctor and forget to ask an important
question:) BTW is he Cute?, Single? In Texas??:)
Sending Warm Healing Skinny thoughts to all:) ttfn
— Barbara I.
July 31, 2000
i have had a crush on every single doctor i have ever had .. its a medical
syndrome that happens to people who werent really cared for emtionally ..
they attach themselves to their care givers .. its normal ..
— [Anonymous]
July 31, 2000
Ok, yes I have been there. I don't have a crush on my surgeon (I haven't
met him yet) but I do on my regular DR. Unfortunately, he's married. I
would never interfere with that. My husband recently left me for someone
else so I am pretty adamant about that. But my Doc is young (early 40's)
cute, funny and a very good listener. I look forward to appts with him.
He is also the first DR. I've ever had who didn't constantly harp on me
about my weight. Oh well. [sigh]
— [Anonymous]
August 2, 2000
Thanks to everyone for sharing your experiences. While I appreciate all
the opinions, "sometimes a cigar is just a cigar" and you're
attracted to someone! Do I think I have repressed feelings of neglect
from my chilhood? NO. Do I think that I'm seeking some sort of attention
that I'm not ghetting closer to home? NO. I happen to find this man
physically attractive and the fact that he can carry on a half-way
humorous/intelligent conversation is a bonus. Will it "resolve"
itself? Probably, but I sure hope not! It's a lot of fun to think about
him and if nothing else it's motivating. I'm just glad to see that there
are others out there who have experienced this...now I don't feel so bad!
:-)
Hugs to everyone...
— [Anonymous]
August 2, 2000
I can say that I have developed a "little" crush on my surgeon.
After all, he saved my life! I know that eventually this feeling will
pass as others have in the past. I am concerned about a couple of the
responses
that I just read. A number of yrs ago I lost 200 lbs and kept a large
portion of it
off for 17 yrs. When I first lost the wt, I didn't know what to do w/
myself. Here I
had all these men looking at me and all these so called
"jealous?" women. I made some
wrong choices. It took a very long time to understand the dynamics of what
I was going
thru at the time. I had to get counselling, also. I have learned from that
experience and
I hope that I don't make the same mistakes this time around. Because I was
never able to wear
sexy clothing, I bought all kinds of revealing things. I wore this kind of
thing constantly.
I wanted others to notice me as I had spent many yrs not being noticed as
anything other than
"that fat woman." I really over did it. Now, I want to take the
weight off mainly for my mental
and physical health. My main objective is NOT to impress others. I know who
I am today. I don't have
to prove anything to anyone. I hope that others under going wls will learn
from my mistakes and not do
what I did. Being all captivated by my OUTSIDE appearance left little time
to work on my INSIDE appearance.
I am not down playing wls, cause it saved my life, but the outside
eventually grows old, but the inside (which
is ALWAYS w/ us) if NOT CULTIVATED will leave us as very shallow,
unattractive individuals.
— kathy S.
September 27, 2000
Yes, I have I have a crush on both my PCP and my surgeon. They are both
attractive men close to my age and they are both very caring and intuitive
men. They are very lie the men that I am attracted to in other parts of my
life. Add to that the fact that they have worked with me to make these
changes and have given me the care and support I have needed and that
intensifies my feelings. However, these men are very professional and I
need that professionalism to help me reach the goals I have set for myself.
I would not dream of letting a personal relationship jeopardize the
professional one at this point. Now, once I reach goal and I'm ready to
focus my interests toward someone else......well, either one would be worth
pursuing. *smile*
The idea about making notes is very good. I always make a list of my meds
and questions for the doctor so that we have an agenda for the appointment.
— [Anonymous]
November 17, 2001
I think it's just our intense gratitude to them that they play such a major
part in making us healthy and normal again. It's a compliment to them. I
want to kiss my doc's feet for simply existing! LOL I can't have a crush
on him though because he has huge pores on his nose and it really bugs me.
I am being a big chicken and posting anonymously cause if he read this, it
might hurt his feelings and I would never want to do that to him. I know
how that feels and in spades.
— [Anonymous]
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