Question:
What do people do for emotional support post-op?

I have just submitted all my pre-op info to Medicaid. In the meantime, I have been working with the nutritionist to try to follow a 1200 calorie diet. This has been somewhat sucessful, as I have lost about 20 pounds. However, I just can't seem to give up the foods I love-ones I won't have after surgery. My mother is extremely overweight and is actually jealous of me having this. She definately enables me eating those forbidden foods. My hospital does not have support groups. I am sure I will do fine physically post-op, but quite concerned about the emotional support and the diet. Any suggestions? Also, if anyone lives in the Painesville, OH area (or Cleveland area), can you please list any support groups that you attend? Thank you, Linda    — Linda C. (posted on October 16, 2003)

October 16, 2003
Assuming that this is not your surgeon's first gastric bypass, I would ask him for the names of other patients--- try to find a group that will meet at least monthly. You'd be surprised how important that level of peer-to-peer support is. Everyone has a coping mechanism to share-- and most people get re-focused on their programs due to regular support groups. Good luck.
   — SteveColarossi

October 16, 2003
The physical restraint will be there so don't worry about that part. As for your mom enabling you - you won't be tempted after so don't worry about it. You should find someone as a support for the emotional. One of my best friends had the surgery 4 wks prior to me and we have been each others' support through this all. I could not get through this without her.
   — Donya P.

October 16, 2003
http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/events.phtml <BR><BR> The link above lists many of the support groups that are open to the public. Hopefully there will be one in your area. I'm pre-op, I know how hard it is to lose the weight ahead of time BUT remember you are doing this to make sure you are your healthiest for surgery and to help prevent complications. Each pound you lose will put the odds more and more in your favor. When you look at it that way, a cookie isn't worth eating. I've lost 44 lbs since January (2 more to go by my pre-op). 26 lbs was doing Weight Watchers, 18 from South Beach Diet (the most recent). I have given up bread, rice, potatoes the last two months and really don't miss them. Once in a while I will take a bite (literally one bite) of a piece of bread or a cookie BUT I have finally learned to stop at that even if it means throwing the rest of the item away. Doing low carb and higher lean protein (in normal serving sizes not unlimited) has really curbed my cravings. I don't mind not eating the junk food. What an amazing discovery that has been. Mary
   — [Deactivated Member]

October 16, 2003
I have a suggestion that is more personal than "support group" stuff. I live in a small community, and other than work friends my hubby and I don't know many people, and my best friend lives clear across the country. So I decided I was going to have to turn to myself for emotional support, and there are times that head hunger tries to make you do things you know you shouldn't do. When I was 2 weeks post-op I told hubby to go get a burger at the tavern because I didn't want to cook -- well, it was huge and juicy and hot, it literally brought tears to my eyes. So to get away I went and took a long, pampering shower. I bought myself my favorite shower gel and a nice loofah, and I spent time just doing girl-stuff (shaving, pedicure, etc) so I wouldn't have to see or smell his hamburger! Also, I go for a walk, go to a store, go to a movie by myself, work out, etc, when I have a craving. I'm not perfect at it but when I want to eat just for the sake of snacking I try to redirect myself to something more productive and to remove myself from the place of the temptation (i.e. get out of the house and away from the kitchen!). If I go to a movie I take a bottle of water and only enough cash in my pocket to buy a ticket so I'm not tempted to buy snacks at the concession stand. If I go to a store I go to one that doesn't have a deli so there's no temptation to eat. It works good, the hard part is getting yourself to actually go do something, once you're out the temptation usually fades and I'm much happier with myself for having not eaten the un-needed food. Try getting into that type of habit before your surgery so it will be in place once you get home. Good luck!
   — beeda

October 16, 2003
My doctor has a patients support group which meets every month, perhaps your surgeon has one too or would be willing to help you support a group. For support, I come to the AMOS site because I can not always make it to the meetings.
   — M B.

October 16, 2003
Hi Linda! I used to live in Painesville. Once in a while I look to see if there is anything going on back there. I do know that there is at least one group in Ashtabula, if not more. There might be some in Mentor as well. Sure is a lot closer than Cleveland! (Less stressful too!) Look in the go local link at the top of the page. Then click on events. In there there should be something. You can also click on the events link and just look for something local for you. Good luck!
   — blueeyedrdhed

October 16, 2003
Linda, It is hard. The surgery is just a tool. We have to learn to still control our emotional eating. I had to have a heart to heart (tough love)with my father because he liked to push food my way. Your mom is afraid she is going to lose her eating buddy. To help with the emotional eating I recommend buying Dr. Phil's book. It deals with our emotional eating habits and why. Exercise when you want to eat. Take a nice walk and drink lots of water. I found out after the surgery I spent a lot of time eating (alot of time). Now that I can't eat what do I do with my time? I've gone back to school, I exercise, I go to church, have a part-time job, etc. It's a whole new live. I'm 6 months post-op and have lost 129 lbs and counting. I went to the store and I can fit into a size 18 pants, size 14 jacket! I haven't been that size in over 20 years! Look forward and maybe your mom will come along for the ride you are going to go on... Good luck
   — Linda R.