Question:
What do I do?I go into see the surgeon and he makes the decsion for me?
I went in to see the surgeon and he says "I only do the open R and Y" he said nothing about the Lap or anything. He does his physical, which to me is blood work and b/p check..no he does a pelvic and rectal check and because my mother has a colon problem and I have acid reflux I now have to have a colonostopy and the scope run down my throat! I am not pleased with this. Is thsi normal for a doctor to do to his new patient? Then when I ask questions the doctor tells me "I can see your going to be a PROBLEM CHILD!" what the heck is up with that? What doctor has the right to call anyone that? I found him very rude! What would you do if you was in my shoes? — BJ G. (posted on July 31, 2003)
July 31, 2003
My goodness BJ! What would WE do? Do what YOU need to do! Get a new
doctor!! You have to be 110% comfortable with the person you choose to
alter your body...you sound completely uncomfortable...you should never
double-guess yourself...follow your instincts.
— Amy A.
July 31, 2003
Run, don't walk from any professional who calls you a problem child. Start
over. Wait months for an appointment with another doctor if you have to,
but don't deal with this man.
— Amber L.
July 31, 2003
Excuse me, but What an ASS!! Run as far as you can. I wouldn't let him
touch me with a 10 foot pole! I've also never heard of that TYPE of exam
either on a first visit! God forbid you ask any questions about what will
be happening to YOU! Sounds like he needs to be taken down a notch or two.
I'd report his behavior.
— Kris T.
July 31, 2003
run like hell to another doctor! If he's that much of an insensitive jerk
on a consult, what's he going to be like when you're in pain and really
need him for something??? And, as far as I'm concerned, the surgeon does
the surgery . . . all that other stuff belongs to your primary doc, someone
that you're very very comfortable with and trust. Good Luck
— lorien
July 31, 2003
The fact that you are asking means that you have doubts--and already know
that this isn't the surgeon for you. While the pelvic and rectal may have
a place in a physical exam as well as a colonoscopy and endoscopy, the
bottomline is that if you are not happy with him--and I certainly don't
blame you--get a new doctor.
I once spent 40 minutes asking an orthopedist about what he was planning on
doing and why (it was a third opinion for a knee replacement). When he
asked if I was trying to have him convince me I said no, I needed
information so that I can make up my mind. Once I make up my mind, I trust
the doctor's judgment. I assure you if he had called me a problem child I
would have walked out of the office.
— Margaret S.
July 31, 2003
I have heard of some wl docs sending people to the ob-gyn but not very
many. The thing that concerns me is that he called you a problem child. I
agree with the other posters, get another surgeon.
— Delores S.
July 31, 2003
know that this is a life long choice and the doctor you choose
must be one with a very understanding nature. Check with your insurance
company and don't be afraid to call the insurance comapny sometimes they're
more helpful than you think. Maybe
they can recommend one they know
— susan B.
July 31, 2003
A little phrase has served me well a couple times in my life: DUMP THE DUD!
Remember most docs are great - best of luck to you! I agree with everybody
else - a good doctor is worth the wait.
— [Deactivated Member]
July 31, 2003
An ass is not strong enough in my opinion!! Run as quickly as you can! I
would have left after being asked to remove my clothing. This is just a
consult. You are ther to find out if you are a candidate only. A rectal
is an acceptable exam but not at the consult. A pelvic is to be done by
you gyn only and I sure wouldn't have consented to this type of exam. Find
a new surgeon and wait!
— smmeow
July 31, 2003
Get a different Dr. I will never but my life in the hands of someone that
I don't like, because I would think all the time "is this Dr. really
doing what is best for me." When my mother was really ill, she had a
new Dr. beacuse her's had moved out of state. This Dr. reminded me of
"Mr. Bean". So when ever I saw him I always thought of him as
running around with a big turkey on his head, and you just can't trust
someone that you see like that to your medical care. After the first visit
she got a new Doctor. I still think of "Mr. Bean when I see the the
that Doctor around.
— jen091172
July 31, 2003
I work in a hospital here in Kansas City. My opinion is that the Doctor
should always have your best interest at heart. I think that if he had
concerns then yes the procedure he done was right. On the other hand, he
had no right to call you a problem child and yes that was VERY rude. I
hope you made that clear to him that day that what he said was
unexceptable. I also feel that you need to be 100% comfortable with your
Dr. or Surgeon. So if you have doubts now I would start looking for one
who treats you with respect.
— Angela C.
July 31, 2003
I have heard of surgeons doing rectals and gyn exams so that there are no
surprises when he opens you up. You can have a dropped uterus. And with
your history the colon stuff is warranted. He needs his ass kicked for
that stupid remark. I would have been so pissed and told him that I did
not appreciate being talked down to. I did look him up on this site and
read many good comments about him. Many talk about being comfortable with a
surgeon for me I look for a good cutter and someone who protects you post
op in the hospital. Nursing care is so critcal to our success. My
surgeons specially train the hospital staff.
I would contact some of his patients. Don't be fooled by a good bedside
manner, because scoundrals know how to manipulate you. It is usually the
nice guy that says stupid things.
— faybay
August 1, 2003
There are too many other good surgeons out there to put up with that crap.
— Karyn B
August 1, 2003
If doc said he only does the open RNY, then that's what he does. Not all
docs do lap or band. If you want one of those procedures, you need to find
a doc that performs those. I don't believe your doc was trying to make a
decision for you or anything. As far as the "problem child"
comment...I think that just shows how different we all are. If I'd been
concerned over some tests he was ordering I run and I was hesitant, the
problem child comment (for me) would have broken the ice and mae it easier
for me to talk to him b/c he was more than likely teasing you and being
sarcastic. With THAT said, my Lola always told me the lowest form of humor
is sarcasm, b/c it gets the laugh by bringing someone else down. If it
truly made you feel bad, you should have told him he hurt your feelings.
Good luck!
— jenn_jenn
August 1, 2003
Just writing to add that a complete physical gives the surgeon a baseline
of health to work from. My clinic folks gave me a checklist to work from:
complete physical, pelvic, mammogram. I offered to send them my
colonoscopy results as well. They don't want any surprises working down
there in the gastrointestinal area. Me neither! As far as the surgeon's
remark, if you're uneasy with him, walk away, there are lots of great
medical folks out there.
— Deborah M.
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