Question:
Are you allowed to

Please don't slam me for this question. I am not looking for a way around my surgery. I am pre-op (another month to go!)and I have made the commitment to changing my lifestyle to accomodate WLS. For the sake of my sanity, and stressing out for the next 25 years over weight regain, what would you say is the percentage of Compliancy/Non-compliancy that will still prevent you from regain. If I am compliant 75% of the time, is that good? Obviously we are all human and will always be MO, so mistakes will be made. The reason I am asking this is to be sure that I can make a complete change of lifestyle, but don't feel that I will be 100% compliant, and don't want to freak out when I mess up. From previous posters, I see that you "slip" from time to time. I definately feel that I can do 80/20. Again, I'm not asking for permission to slip, but what is the realistic goal that I can set for myself that I can live with? ALSO, Am I a grazer? I usually eat three meals with a small snack mid-morning and mid-afternoon. Does this constitute a grazer? I'm not really sure of the definition of the term. Thanks for all your help! You have all been tremendous and helped us pre-opers through a stressful time.    — Denise B. (posted on July 24, 2003)

July 24, 2003
I probably make 80/20 and I haven't had any problems maintaining my weight so far (2+ yrs out and @ goal for 15 months). I think the trick is to adopt generally healthy eating patterns and do something about it when you get out of control. I notice every few months that my carb consumption gets out of control and I feel hungry and miserable. I may gain a pound or two. That is my clue to jump on it before 2 pounds becomes 20 pounds. It is a whole lot easier to lose 2 pounds!<p>I think you are on the right track. I don't look on this as failure, I am glad I have the ability to regain control of my eating. Most people tell me I eat the healthiest of anyone they know and, truth be told, with a few exceptions I eat what I want. (Between you and me, I DO miss some of the breakfast foods like cinnamon scones and stuff ;)<p>I eat every 2-3 hours and have from the beginning. I think this has actually been crucial to my success because it allows me to get in plenty of protein and it keeps me from feeling deprived while keeping my metabolism steady throughout the day. Eating every few hours is not grazing. Grazing is if you have a bag of XXX (insert your trigger food here) that you leave on your desk at work and pick-pick-pick all day long. You are never really full/satisfied, yet you may end up eating the entire bag of XXX. To use the pouch to its fullest advantage, you need to actually fill it up so that the stretch on the pouch walls sends a chemical signal to your brain that says, "I'm full. Don't eat any more!" If you eat over a long period of time (>20 minutes) or drink while you eat, you will defeat the purpose of the pouch. Hope this helps!
   — ctyst

July 24, 2003
I have no knowledge to address the first part of your question, however the latter I do. No, you are not even close to what I call a grazer. I am definately one at night. My husband usually does the cooking so I don't even have to deal with that. What I do that qualifies me as a grazer is SKIP a meal (usually dinner) and pick at stuff all evening long. Kind of the way you do when you're a little hungry and can't decide what for. You know, a piece of cheese, a handful of chips, a scoop of ice-cream etc. You get the point. Keep in mind that I have not yet had surgery.
   — Angela T.

July 24, 2003
I'm still pre-op also so please take what I say in that context. Regarding grazing, I don't think 3 full meals and a small snack twice a day would be considered grazing. As a matter of fact, my nutritionist feels that the typical time between meals (usually 5 hours) is much too long and a small protein snack is necessary. Regarding 100% compliance, you're right, of course, that it is virtually impossible to do everything correct all the time. We are, after all, human. However, I think you have to prepare yourself to commit 100% to this. I think it's wrong to go into WLS saying "I'll be good 80% of the time." That just leaves too much of a chance for your to undo the surgery and why would you go through that only to give yourself over 80% of the time. When you "slip", hopefully the built in deterrents of WLS (dumping and vomiting) will keep you from slipping again. But it's my opinion that if you aren't ready to really commit yourself to doing what you need to do to make this tool work, don't do it. Just my opinion.
   — antiques55

July 24, 2003
Firstly, I have to agree that I do not consider your eating pattern "grazing". At first (post-op) I was instructed to eat 5 times/day to get in what I could. That being said, don't sell yourself short, thinking that you can only put forth a limited amount of effort and commitment. You can do this! To be really, really honest, the people I see regaining do the following: 1. stop doing support groups, 2. try to test their dumping mechanism, 3. occassionally cheat on the quality of their food, 4. start gaining weight back, 5. Eat emotionally and forget what a blessing their WLS was. Just an observation, since you did ask. Also, have something "illegal" once in a great while won't sabotage you completely... take one bite, and be done with it. Just realize what you are doing, and remember that you are making choices when you eat. Don't eat emotionally. One last thing.... I am confused by, "we are all human and will always be MO." I know I am human, but I REFUSE to go back to begin morbidly obese. This attitude has kept me moving... especially away from the fridge! Good luck to you- you can do this!!!
   — kultgirl

July 24, 2003
I think we have to be forever vigilant, but not perfect! I don't think anyone can break down the percentage of time you must be "good" and can be "bad"--it will vary by person, by what you choose to be "bad" about (water, carbs, sweets, exercise, etc.), by your metabolism, etc., etc. Go into this with the idea that you will do the best you can every day, will take measures to help you notice when you get off-track, get back on track when you know you're slipping into poor patterns, and be conscious of your health. Do that on a regular basis, and you'll be just fine. Also, I would not label you a grazer by any menas. Grazing means eating small amounts of food frequently. Distinct meals and snacks is a very different thing. With grazing you can easily lose track of what you've eaten, how much you've eaten, and then have no room for healthy food. Distinct meals and snacks are intentional and planned for. When I was MO, I didn't snack during the day, thinking that that was how I was supposed to eat. All that did was make me so ravenously hungry by the time I got home at night that I ate everything in sight until bedtime (a pre-dinner snack, dinner, a post-dinner snack, a pre-bedtime snack--now THAT'S grazing). Now, I plan three meals and one or two snacks every day. If I eat every three hours or so, I don't get hungry, and don't have the urge to eat everything I come across. I firmly believe it's a smarter way to eat. You're going to be fine.
   — Vespa R.

July 24, 2003
I don't think you should put a percent on compliance. If you do, lets say being "good" 80 percent of the time and it slips to 70% are you being "bad"? Doesn't that just smack of our pre-op days? Make the committment for a lifestyle change but that lifestyle has to be livable. If you have to live thinking that you have to be compliant a certain percent of the time and if your not, you have slipped, you will lose your sanity and thats too much. Better to make the committment to eat right, get plenty of protein, water, exercise, vitamins and minimize snacking. For me, I have to have my treats and DAILY. So, I get in my protein, keep an eye on the scale, exercise regularly, drink only water, and enjoy the treats. After 17 months, successful so far. If the scale creeps up a little, I increase the exercise and lower the snacking. To me, thats a much easier way to live.
   — Cindy R.

July 24, 2003
I had this surgery to escape the diet and good and bad food mentality. I have never dieted, nor counted the calories or fat grams of my food. I am over 2 1/2 years post op and maintaining effortlessly, without ever dieting. I wouldn't know my percentage of compliance. Perhaps, the difference in my success is this... My weight problem was a byproduct of years and years of deprivation --binging--guilt--deprivation---binging---guilt, etc... I no longer have any deprivation, so the cycle can not repeat. I truly eat whatever I want. I have given myself permission to eat. I no longer label foods good or bad. The reason I am successful, is my tool now restricts the amount of food I eat. And the foods that I want are not the same as pre-op. Don't get me wrong, I do not eat salads all day and avoid snacks. Quite the opposite. I eat lots of protein (all from food) and if I want a snack (Hershey's dark chocolate!!) I have it without hesitation. I don't ever feel like I have to then compensate and restrict my food the next day to "make up" for the mistakes I made. This is soooo liberating and I really wish that I could encourage others to pursue this pathway postop. Of course, the main thing that helped me is my surgeon also has the same mindset. He wants us to be normal!!! He has never expected protein shakes, food journals, dietician consults, fat gram or calorie counting. He gave us the tool to live normally and to get the focus OFF of food. I am proud to say, this approach has been wonderful for me. Shelley
   — Shelley.

July 25, 2003
Denise - One of the wonderful things about the tool of WLS is that it assists you in being able to make good choices. For example, I'm almost 3 months out. One of the foods that I miss most is sugar. I didn't realize that I consumed quite a bit of sugar pre-op. Even though I didn't drink many sodas, I had 2-3 a week. Well, I can't do that anymore and miss it. I never had ice cream or foods like that because they were so "bad" for me. The thing about this wonderful WLS tool is that it assists by, what I call, "holding me accountable" when I eat something I shouldn't. For instance, I was craving ice cream for weeks. I finally stopped at Dairy Queen and got a small cup of soft ice cream. When I got home, I had a bite of it...no problem. A while later, had another bite, and then another...still no problems. So, I ate the whole small cup of ice cream, very slowly and felt just fine....for about 30 minutes and then I got so sick, cramping and nauseous and heart racing and clammy. It sent me to bed for 3 hours. I haven't craved ice cream since! See how that works??!!! ha As SHELLEY stated, the WLS completely has taken away the deprivation for me. That has been the BIGGEST change in my life. I don't feel deprived so I don't feel the need to binge. It's a wonderful, wonderful thing and I thank God for it every single day.
   — [Deactivated Member]