Question:
My caregiver is nervous about caring for me for a few days post-op.

My dear friend is nervous about caring for me for a few days post op. Could anyone give her a few words of comfort to reassure her that this is something a caring friend can do without being a licensed RN? She is worried about driving me home (5 hours) in particular and seems to think I need an RN instead of her. I want her to be with me but not worried and scared about it. Thanks so much for your help.    — Libby B. (posted on August 10, 2000)

August 10, 2000
Hello. I had a friend stay with me 4 days and nights following surgery. She has no medical training at all, and she did great. She helped me with my bath, in and out of the shower. Helped me get ready for bed, I had some draiage at the incision site , so she changed my bandages. Helped me get out of the bed, since I had nothing to pull myself up with. she also prepared my food. She did a great job, I think that any caring compassionate person could do this. Your friend will do great.
   — STAR W.

August 10, 2000
Libby, Tell her my husband helped me and if HE can do it- she will be fine:) He gets queasy at ANY bodily fluid, much less looking at an incision. I really didn't need him for too much- he helped me chang the bandage by handing me tape, fixed a few meals, but mostly, was a GREAT moral support- it was just FANTASTIC he could be home with me! Your friend will be a HUGE physical help, but she will be even more valuable as an emotional support person. Good Luck!
   — M B.

August 10, 2000
Libby, I know how you feel. Who wants a complete stranger (rn) caring for you when you can have your friend who means something to you? I'm like that too. But just make sure you two have everything you need. Drive in the car in a robe and slippers, don't wear shoes. Have your sipper cup ready and cold water. Make sure she's armed with all the right phone numbers in case of an emergency. Do you have a cell phone for the ride home? If so, bring it. Have her get you plenty of puree type foods ahead of time so you're not in a mad rush to grocery shop. Have other people stop by for respite (is that the right word?) I mean to give her a break from caregiving. To your friend I just say that my sister, mom and fiance took incredible care of me and none are medical professionals. If she and you listen to the aftercare advice they give you just do it and everything will be ok for both of you.
   — [Deactivated Member]