Question:
My surgery is in 18 hours (1pm/July13). I need some last minute advise.

I have been very emotional today. I just look at my beautiful children and start crying. Did anyone else fear death before the surgery? What helped? I am also nervous about the nurses in the hospital. A friend of mine had the same hospital and told me that the nurses were not compitent (spelling?)...I don't mean to offend any 'good' nurses out here. :) How do I raise that concern before my surgery without 'bashing' the feelings of the staff? Thank you! Lisa Boone RNY 13July 1pm 23 years old    — [Deactivated Member] (posted on July 12, 1999)

July 12, 1999
Lisa- I had my surgery in Norfolk May 12th- Sentara Leigh hospital. Which one are you going to? I am off line til 10pm- you can call me if you want- 855-7998- rebecca p.s.- good luck if you don't write- you will be fine
   — rebecca M.

July 12, 1999
Hi Lisa, my surgery is this friday the 16th. I am also very scared. I have four beautiful children. The thing that helps me is to remember I am saving my life to watch them grow up. I am doing this for all of my family. I know if I don't get my surgery, I may die anytime due to this weight. That help's and asking God to give me strenght also. Good luck and remember there are people who really care.
   — Sherie S.

July 12, 1999
Our doctor jokes that if you're NOT afraid before suregry, THEN they send you to a shrink! I think everyone is terrified! Going "under", "under the knife", the potential changes--how utterly frightening. But for us, surgery of some sort is almost guaranteed, eventually. Our organs don't last long under the load. For me, with my faith, I figured I could die slowly over the next few months as my weight crushed me OR I could die fast on the table. Either way, I was dead, and ended up in the same (good) place. So, given the choice of suffering or not, I chose not. I won either way. The third option was to survive the surgery, lose the weight and live happily ever after. Which is what has happened to date. It'll be 5 years in October. Of everyone in the family, I'm the only one who can crawl on the floor with my grandson (whom I'd have not lived to see). Was it worth it? Yep. Would I do it again? Annually, if I had to!
   — vitalady

July 12, 1999
I wish I had the magic words to make you feel better, I felt pretty much the same way. If possible have a friend or relative stay with you as much as possible in the hospital to be your "advocate" The nurses will try harder with someone watching and have that person ask questions and speak up if you are having problems. Be proud that you are will to do this for a healthier life for yourself and your children. You are very brave for being so young and you will love your new life! And my last piece of advise, is use that morphine, don't be shy, it is not that much worse than child birth!!
   — JAN C.

July 12, 1999
Lisa- I don't know if you'll read this before you go but- you need to stay focussed on why you are having the surgery. Let your mind work on your behalf. I knew I was taking a risk just going in for the operation but all operations are a risk. My need for this operation overwhelmed the risk. It something that rose above all my fear. My need to save my life. This operation was my last chance. No risk was too high for me. Yes, I was not blind to the fact that "Sheila- you may not ever make it off the table" BUT I HAD TO GIVE MYSELF THAT CHANCE TO LIVE. Thats' what you're doing. Even as they prepped me for surgery -one thought crossed my mind - Get up and run. But then another though crossed my mind- You have got to give yourself this chance to live. Please Sheila- I knew where that came from- the person within that wants and deserves to live a normal healthy life. She ( which was my true self) was begging for the chance to lose the weight I've tried all my life to loose. And now look at me I'm 70 lbs down since March 26, 1999. And it is just the beginning. Lisa- You have so many people by your side- believing for your successful operation and easy recovery. We are here for you. Just as I was be prepped for the operation, I could feel the prayers of my 5th grade class surrounding me. And my mother that had just passed the Christmas before my operation. As I was being wheeled out mins. after my procedure- It was as if someone had handed me a checkered flag and said "GO FOR IT SHEILA" They handed me my dream. Even before I had lost one single pound- I knew I was going to make it through and YOU WILL ALSO. This is a God-sent. Don't allow anything or anyone or any doubt to cloud your focus. You deserve it. I'll be right there in spirit with you. Please keep us posted. God Bless. Sheila.
   — Sheila W.

July 12, 1999
Hi Liza, I was so nervous about dying, that I had to postpone my surgery for one month. It's part of the experience. I'm now 2 wks. Postop and losing 10 lbs./week. It's all worth it. God will be with you.
   — Alyce K.