Question:
ANYONE ELSE GET SERIOUSLY TERRIFIED PRE-OP?

GOT MY DATE TODAY..OCT 15 AND AM SCARED AND PANICKING. Seriously... I am so scared of dying and so scared that if I live I will have complications, or just be nauseated and sick forever. Not really sure what my question is, but wondering if anyone can offer me any advice on how to calm myself down. I am trying to pray about it but feel like I am too freaked to leave it with God. Also, my emotions are always evident in my gut on a daily basis and I am wondering if that will have a negative effect on my recovery, will it make me more prone to feel sick. Anyone else out there with an emotional stomach? How did the surgery effect this? Sorry this is so long... Pam in GA    — Pam B. (posted on October 3, 2003)


October 2, 2003
Hi Pam! I understand where you are coming from. I think it is perfectly normal to be nervous and freaked out. Just go to God and he will be there for you. I am looking at surgery on the 20th and I am praying 10 or 15 times a day. When I start getting that funny feeling in the pit of my stomach i stop for a moment and say a little prayer. And just remember that the odds are in your favor, the majority of the people who have this procedure do just fine. My friend had it done on a Monday and was shopping on Friday! I will add you to my prayer list and God Bless!
   — Judith D.

October 2, 2003
Oh, Pam.. I totally relate. I'm up at bat on 10/13, and I feel the same thing! Everyone is kinda laughing at me, because I'm literally making up things to be worried about! I finally get over one thing, and something else pops in my head and sends me into worry! And speaking of emotions, hubby hasn't really spoken to me in a few days, because every darn thing he says ticks me off! haha! But Pam.. it's going to be ok! I just keep saying to myself I'm so nervous now, but when all is said and done it will be something that I can laugh about later, because I'm going to be just fine!
   — Michelle J.

October 2, 2003
Boy that was me a month ago now 3 days away from my surgery and I am Calm!!! I am not an overly religous person but I do beleive and have decided that we are all here for a reason and if I was not meant to have this surgery he wouldn't have led me to this decision. My biggest fear was leaving my 3 kids. I have always felt that I was brought to this earth to be there mother. I live for my children. I know that he will not let anything happen to me because GOD knows my husband certainly couldn't take care of those kids!!! I haven't told anyone but my husband about this WLS. evryone thinks I am having my gallbladder out.So I don't have alot of support but I know this is what I want. I will let you know how I do after surgery.Eileen
   — Beth B.

October 2, 2003
I also can relate to the fears. My surgery is scheduled for Oct. 24th and the past few nights have been pretty restless...I should be in great shape by the 24th...LOL I did talk with a friend last night who had her surgery this past Monday, was home on Wed. and out shopping on Thurs. She said the shopping was pushing it a bit but, she said she feels great, had little pain afterwards ( she had an open) and is looking forward to a healthy, meaningful new life. I know her reassurance helped me alot; we even have the same surgeon!
   — Deb S.

October 2, 2003
This is a normal reaction. After all this is a major decision. Calm down and think hard about it. There is a lifestyle change involved and on the surface people seem to push that back. I would get out and walk, take a trip help other people by posting about your experiences. Talk about it with friends and learn all you can. Make yourself informed. Come and ask questions at www.wlsbutterflynetwork.org. We have lots of people whoi have been through this and they can help.
   — snicklefritz

October 2, 2003
I sure did. But that terrifying time was over 2 years and over 100 pounds ago. Read my profile I felt like the prisoner going to the electric chair.<P> BEST DECISION I EVER MADE!
   — bob-haller

October 2, 2003
Hi. I was nervous to have my surgery however I was much more nervous about not having it! Remember the song...Don't Worry, Be Happy....Everything will be alright. Well... go in thinking this and come out thinking this too. It will be the greatest decision you'll ever make. Mary Elgin
   — Mary E.

October 2, 2003
Hey Pam - I was incredibly nervous right before I had it done. I went and updated my will and made last instructions for my funeral, etc and there's probably nothing you can do to make yourself feel totally at ease but I would do what I did which was to look at the numbers of people who've had it done versus the number who pass away and I liked my chances. Also, I had complete faith in my surgeon, who was very reassuring to me. I would suggest that you ask for something to relax you when you get into the hospital. As far as recovery, you'll feel so much better when you come through the surgery and your surgeon comes to see you and tells you that you're fine. Bedside manner goes a long way when you're in recovery. Good luck to you and have faith not just in God but in your surgeon and the team he or she has assembled. While you're at it, have a little faith in yourself as well! - Mike
   — Michael N.

October 2, 2003
Pam, congratulations on your upcoming surgery date. It is perferctly normal feeling the emotions and fears that you are. We can't ignore the risks and potentional complications that can occur afterwards and definitely need to be aware of them. We can prevent or eliminate these by making sure that we get a good pre-op exam, have a good follow-up care program and by becoming very educated on all aspects (vitamins, do's and don'ts, etc) of being a post-op. I feel that my risks were greater if I didn't have the surgery and knowing this helped me become more at ease with the process. I think that it is also common that immediately after surgery you might regret your decision. Remember though the first couple of days you will not be feeling your best and it is easier for those thoughts to enter into your mind when you don't feel top of the world. By day 3, I was feeling much better and haven't had any regrets since - only that I hadn't had the surgery mucy sooner. Good luck!
   — Judy R.

October 2, 2003
yEAH, ME TOO. I FEEL THE EXACT SAME WAY. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT THOUGH EITHER. MINE IS ON OCTOBER 14TH. I AM GLAD AND ALSO SCARED. REAL SCARED GOOD LUCK AND GOD BLESS AND TAKE CARE OF YOU BEFORE, DURING AND AFTER THE BIG DAY
   — M C.

October 3, 2003
Personally I did not freak out until the day of surgery. I just cried and cried and I have no idea why. I wasn't scared of dying and I had had such a long time to prepare myself mentally for it all, but when it comes to the day or even close to the day, you start to realize that life is going to change forever. Even though I knew it was for the better, I was still petrified of the change. Anything you may feel is normal is basically what I have learned. We all react in a different way and after it is done you will have a new feeling of shock that its over. Good luck, it will be a long couple of weeks, but you will get through it.
   — Ellen K.

October 3, 2003
Funny thing is I wasn't at all worried/scared/concerned about my RNY surgery 2 years ago. However, I was petrified and scared to death of my plastic surgery 6 weeks ago. Obviously I came out of both experiences just fine, but everybody handles different circumstances differently, and I would say you are normal and have every right to feel the way you are feeling. But, please know that hundreds of people have this procedure everyday and are fine. Just surround yourslef with people who love and care about you, talk a lot oabout what you are feeling, and just have confidence that you are doing what is right for you.
   — Danielle M.

October 3, 2003
Pam, I felt extremely scared as well, I just kept re-assuring myself that everything would be ok. Just lean on a friend or loved one for some support and let them know how you feel, that definatly helped me! Just to let you know I am only 1 week & 1 day post op and I feel TERRIFIC!!!! Good Luck To You!
   — Saxbyd

October 3, 2003
I had several moments of doubt. I didn't actually panic until the day of the surgery. I just bawled my eyes out in the pre-op room. I was so scared. Yes, complications could happen to anyone, and there's no way to tell who. I just had to keep asking myself: What are my alternatives? Live with diabetes? Heart problems? Constant pain? (the list could go on and on) When I weighed it like that, it made things clearer to me and I felt better about the surgery. I'm three months out and SO glad I went through with it. Good luck!
   — Jennifer H.

October 3, 2003
I was so scared! All those "what ifs"!!!!!! It has worked and I came through it all very well. Best of luck to you!
   — debmi

October 3, 2003
LOL! We were all terrified! You are quite normal. :) Funny I was more scared at night (while waking up) than during the day time. Weird.
   — Danmark

October 3, 2003
Daniel, I was the same way, I think during the day it is easier to keep your mind from wandering, there were a few times I cried at night laying in bed before surgery, so I don't think it is odd at all....lol
   — Saxbyd

October 4, 2003
Pam - it's normal to experience some fear when you finally get the date for surgery. I found, for me, that accepting the fact that I was afraid was a big help. This is a life changing event you are entering into. My surgery was September 23rd, and for about 48 hours before I was a mess. Maybe that's why typically we don't get surgery dates "way out there" - I don't know. But it is normal. If you let it grow, there is no doubt it could make things more difficult for you - but I believe that if you accept your fear and allow yourself to feel it, it will have much less power over you and you will find yourself feeling better and better. And just before surgery, if you get the jitters again, it's okay. Just remember you're doing this for you and there are many of us out here who will be praying for you - and then you'll join us on the losing side. Take care! Diana :)
   — Diana D.

October 4, 2003
Pam, I am right there with you. My open RNY is on 10.20. When I get scared, I just think about how much better I will be feeling a month later, 2 months later. Just think, by Christmas time, we will be feeling light and have a lot more energy! I am scared of the pain too, but there's morphine for that! God Bless! Maria
   — Maria M.

October 4, 2003
My surgery was Sept.25th & I feel terrific! ALOT OF ENERGY ALREADY! I will be wishing all of you the best!
   — Saxbyd

October 4, 2003
I had a stomach before surgery that the minute I would get seriously upset or nervous, you never knew what end I would expell from... And I was terrified... The morning of the surgery I woke up sobbing and didn't stop till they put me to sleep... lots of emotions and fear, but when I woke up oddly enough no gaging, no nasuea.. and I still dont have issue a month out... granted I am being good for fear. Pam I have to tell you... It is normal to be scared... Change is scary and change like this is even more scary... but the good news is the waiting is the worse part... once it is done you have an average of 2 weeks of the yucks, and it all gets better every day. GOOD LUCK... and ya know God is listening...
   — colette73

October 4, 2003
I HAVE POSTED THIS ANSWER 3 TIMES TODAY ON THIS SITE(JUST WORDED DIFFERENTLY)...I WAS SCARED OUT OF MY WITS BEFORE SURGERY...SCARED TO LIVE A LIFE IN THE BODY I HAD CREATED FOR MYSELF...I'M A 55 YR OLD WOMAN WHO WEIGHED 445 LBS & CAME OUT OF SURGERY WITHOUT A HITCH...I FEEL FANTASTIC & HAVE SO MUCH ENERGY I HARDLY KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH IT...I JUST PSYCHED MYSELF OUT TO NOT BE FRIGHTENED & THAT IS THE WAY IT WAS!..I HAVE LOST 102 LBS SINCE 03/26/03...*GOOD LUCK TO YOU*...
   — BLSLIM77

October 4, 2003
Pam, Its perfectly normal to feel nervous about such a big event! I've been preparing for whatever might happen in advance because I too need that settled feeling. I've written notes to loved ones that will comfort them if needed. Not like I'm counting on a bad outcome or anything, just doing it as something to calm down the jitters. I don't want to leave things undone. I've been praying and reading Scripture which has been like nutritious food for me. Perhaps you could possibly change your date a bit to give you more time for preparedness. Why is everyone in such a hurry? Surely a calm, healthy tummy would be preferable to a "ball of turmoil" going into this surgery.
   — Soosan




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