Question:
I have to many questions Please Help!!!

I have so many questions from where to begin and what my qualifications need to be, and as how this will change my lifestyle. Q-1)- Im 19,285lbs,BMI-42.1,co-morbiditys-asthma,sleep apnea,lower back pain, breathing problems(with physical exhertion) what would be the best surgecal option? Q-2)- How will this affect my lifestyle? will i still be able to have a drink now and than? or is that off limits completely Q-3)- Will I be able to have children after surgery? Q-4)- Being my age will I be able to be approved? Q-5)- Whats the pain level expected for post-op? Q-6)- Where would I find a Dr. who is WLS friendly? Q-7)- Will BC/BS give me a hard time? please if i can find someone who will answer my questions, my health and life depend on it! I constantly live with being out of breath, getting pains in my chest when am active, but every time i go to a doctors office they tell me that i have to have will power, and then i just feel utterly humiliated and dont bother going back. A good friend of mine was only in late twenties, and weighed over 3oo lbs, and died 2 yrs ago of a masive heartattck, and I dont want that to be me. but i have tried every diet regimen and none has helped, oh sure maybe for a few weeks but once i go off i gain it all back and then some. I have never been put on a diet by a doctor, and have never even been given any type of pill that will help, my sister who is smaller than me, went to a doctor and she didnt even ask for diet pills and he gave her some, but when i went there he told me that he wouldnt give me any!!, Why cant they see that if they dont help me, I feel as though i will die of morbid obesity! Sure i want to look good, and there are all those other vanity issues, but more than anything i want to be healthy, i want a long life, and i want to be physically fit. My family history is diabetes,chf,heart problems(like you wouldnt believe)! these are things that i dont want for myself! If you can help me answer these questions please email me soon!!! [email protected]    — Bonita W. (posted on March 31, 2001)

March 31, 2001
Oh girl...like all of us you have so many questions when you start out. Some days I look on here and someone has even asked a question I never even thought to ask. Spend some time reading through the LARGE bank of past Q & A on this site. You'll spend quite a bit of time, but I think you'll feel more informed when you are done. Better yet, you will pull from a variety of people and not just from one case...everyone has such different experiences. My heart goes out to you and I wish you well on your "journey". Finding this site has been a literal lifesaver for me. I'm scheduled for open RnY on May 14 and I can hardly wait! God bless you!
   — Donda B.

March 31, 2001
I had an open VBG on Jan 30th. Yes, you will have alot of questions and yes, you will get alot of different answers. But basically, no one can tell you what surgery is right for you. You need to check them out and do the one that feels right for you. As far as WLS friendly, you need to go on-line and find a surgeon in your area that does this and then have a consultation with them. If it doesn't feel right, try another. The best advise I can give is you have got to want to do this and feel comfortable with this. That means get a doctor you like and that will explain your options to you and then pick the surgery that feels right to you. You will be nervous, scared and maybe a little uptight, but you will know if it is the one for you. I had Wellmark insurance which is a break off of BC/BS and had no problem. They approved the very first time and I got my surgery schedule within 2 weeks of insurance approval. Good luck on your research and I am proud of you for looking at your options at your age. if you have any other questions, feel free to email me [email protected]. Also, with my type of surgery, my doctor has had patients get pregeant and have babies with no difficulties.
   — Rose D.

April 1, 2001
Bonita, good luck on finding the answers to your questions. You have already took the most important step and thats deciding you have a problem and need help. You should be able to find a good Dr. thru this site as no matter where you live, there is someone pretty close that has had this experience and can guide you to a well informed and competent Dr. I didn't think that was true but I had already heard of my Dr. on this site before my pcp sent me 300 miles to see him. It is well worth it too. You will have to do some tests and some paperwork, maybe lose some weight pre-op, attend support group, whatever we have to go thru, its well worth the efforts. Good luck baby and if you ever need to talk, my email is [email protected]. PS. Don't worry about not being able to drink, you won't miss it when you think of the benefits, you can always have "virgin" drinks!!
   — Juanita B.

April 1, 2001
First of all I wish I had found out about the option of WLS at age 19, so you are one step ahead of me. I just turned 30 one week after my surgery 02/13/01 and was 289 pounds. I had the open RNY and am now 262 and dropping. The surgery really hasn't affected my lifestyle in a negative way. I went out last week and had a few beers with friends, I just drank a bit slower and had water in between. No big deal. (I know some people are affected differently, so I am not suggesting everyone go drink alcohol, I am just telling about my situation.) I have gone out to dinner with friends and had no problem feeling like I was eating differently than them. If anything, I was more comfortable because I was not obsessing about the food and was able to enjoy the company, unlike in the past. I don't have any children, but would like to have them someday and my surgeon says this should not be a problem. He just advises that I wait at least a year, which will not be a problem as I don't even have a boyfriend now. At least not yet! As far as the pain factor, I would let that be the last thing to deter you from having the surgery. I am not saying the first week was pleasant, but with the pain meds it was tolerable. Much better than the pain you feel every day due to being overweight (emotional and physical). I actually have forgotten the pain mostly, I guess like they say women who go thru childbirth forget the pain with time. Weird. I hope these have answered some of your questions. I don't know about your insurance, but I found my doctor by reading comments about him on this site. I couldn't be happier with my surgeon. This site is a great source of info. I still come here daily to learn and get support. If you have any questions please feel free to email me. My email address is on my profile page. :) Take care.
   — Kelli B.

April 1, 2001
Hi Bonita, Like the other postings, I agree that you are definetly one step ahead at. I turned 29 a few weeks after surgery,and my only regret is not doing this years ago. From what I understand Your body will deal with a pregnancy much better with your weight loss, I have heard of MANY, MANY women who got pregnant after surgery. The first step is to have the suregery than everything else will fall into place. And as far as drinking goes I assume you are referring to alcohol, By the time you are old enough to legally drink you should have no problems. No reason to rush things- Ya know. Good luck
   — Lauren P.

April 1, 2001
Been 6+ yrs for me. Life hasn't been perfect after wt loss, but you know, it wasn't before that, either. Since these other people have addressed so many of your concerns so well, I'm just adding my .02 worth. I wish I'd done it sooner. LOTS sooner. Even though that might've meant getting a more primitive surgery than the one I have today, I'd stil have been able to skip the asthma, apnea, crushed feet, etc. Whatever pain there was post-op is so minimal in the long term scheme of things to me now, that I can't really address it. I don't mean to minimize it, but compared to not breathing or walking, it was a drop in the time bucket. I so wish I'd been of a normal body wt when I was raising my babies! I think if you ask for a WLS friendly PCP and a surgeon near you on this site, you will get many responses. Feel free to email me privately if you had long term questions.
   — vitalady