Question:
pre-op I have two little ones.

One of my childeren is four years old and my other on is 15 months old and I was just woundering if anyone else has little childeren that is post op and how did you handel it and was it hard to deal with the picking up and holding them.    — tmalotte (posted on August 19, 2005)

August 19, 2005
My daughter was 2 when i had my surgery. It is difficult after surgery as they don't understand why you can't pick them up. Your 4 year old is old enough to understand, but the 15 month old is a different story. I showed my incisions to my daughter and talked about Mommy's owies to her. She seemed to understand that ok and didn't hit my stomach too much. However, she still wanted held and picked up. I did pick her up (I know, against dr orders) but only when I was sitting down. If at all possible, you might want to get someone to stay with you during the day for a couple weeks to help with the kids. Carmen
   — kccjer

August 19, 2005
I had a 16 month old and a 4 year old when I had my open RNY. I actually scheduled my surgery for when my oldest child would be home from college for Christmas break. She and my DH helped by doing all the lifting, and would place the baby on me while I was resting in the recliner for cuddles, he seemed to know and was rather gentle. As long as you have help you should be fine. Also the restrictions on lifting depend on what type of surgery your having, open versus lap. Best wishes!
   — PhyllisM

August 19, 2005
I had my open RNY about a week before my daughter's 2nd b-day. Fortunately I had my parents here for the first 10 days after surgery. I was able to get around ok, but had my staples in for 19 days. After the first week I would let my daughter sit on my lap, but I didn't actually pick her up while standing until about 3 weeks out of surgery. (The doctor said to wait 6 weeks). My muscles were just too weak. Instead, we cuddled on the bed or couch and sometimes I would put a pillow over my incision to act as a buffer between us...which helped. My daughter is now almost 5 and I also have a newborn (4 weeks old). Even though my daughter was only almost 2 at the time of the surgery, she still remembers me 165lbs heavier, and says she is happy that I can play with her now (of course right now I'm busy with the baby...but that's a different story :-) Congrats on your decision to have the surgery and best wishes. My quality of life and my desire to be around for my daughter is what pushed me to take the final step after years of unhappiness with myself. I am so happy that I made the decision to have the surgery...even when remembering the first few weeks afterwards when I was thinking "what have I done to myself?" The first 3 months or so are the most difficult (think of having a baby...getting used to a new life...except this time it is your new life) but it goes quickly and you will get through it. I would suggest getting someone to help with the kids for the first couple of weeks after the hospital if you are having open surgery. If lap surgery, you may heal much quicker since there isn't such a large external scar, but you still need to be careful. Good luck!
   — angelav

August 20, 2005
I had a 5 month old, 2 year old and a 6 year old when I had my surgery. My husband was with me the first week and then my mom stayed with me for the next 2 weeks to take care of the kids. They would sit the kids on my lap for a few minutes and then take them off of me. I didn't actually pick the baby up until about 3 weeks Post-Op. That is when I started taking care of them on my own again. My mom would come over for a little while to check on me and then hubby would take care of them when he came home in the evening. I was definetely back to normal at 6 weeks out with no help at all. Best of Luck! Mellisia
   — EPprincess29

August 20, 2005
I had my Open RNY a week after my son's 2nd b'day and my other son just turned 3 yrs old. My Mom was here for the first week out of the hospital and my Dad the second. By the third week I was handling the boys by myself. I didn't lift them and they used a step stool to get on top of the changing table. I wasn't in pain, but very, very tired for the first 6 wks, which is hard for two children to deal with. I'm so thankful I had the surgery and am able to keep up and participate with my active boys! Best of luck with your surgery.....275/175/145
   — SJWendy

August 20, 2005
I had one in kindergarden and a (barely)2 year old when I had surgery. It wasn't as difficult as I had thought, however the older one was in school and the younger continued to go to daycare during the day. My husband worked evenings leaving me with the kids alone until after their bedtime. Diaper changes happened on the floor, I used a stepstool for the youngest to get into the bathtub, and they both were VERY understanding that mommy's tummy was off limits. Although the 2 y/o did see the tube hanging from under my shirt one day and yanked on it real hard while asking 'Wut dat?' That wasn't fun. :P
   — RebeccaP

August 21, 2005
Hi Tiffany, I have a 3 1/2 year old and a 2 year old, so your question really hit home. I am 4 days post op, yep, 4 DAYS and I've done fine. Hubby stayed with the kids during surgery and my one day stay at the hospital (we told them mommy had to sleep at the doctors so he could try and fix my inside owies). The next day I came home. I showed the "owies" to my angels and after my littlest kissed them better, they were completely understanding and have still been great. When they ask to be picked up, I either sit on the floor and hold them in my lap, or tell them that mommies owies aren't better yet, so I can't. They are okay with that. Don't let the worry of your little ones stop you from doing this. They and you will do great. Focus on how healthy and better you will be for them afterwards and you will come out fine! Hugs! Amms
   — AmberIL

August 22, 2005
Hey! I am 12 days post op and I have a 16 month old daughter. It is very hard for me not to pick her up, and she doesn't understand why I'm not picking her up. I do get on the floor with her and let her climb on my lap or she also climbs up on the chair and sits with me. Take them on your walks with you, my daughter loves that. It also helps that my husband will pick her up for me and hold her while we give each other our kisses!!
   — butterfly77ckc