Question:
Old girlfriend getting WLS

A old girlfriend of mine (not romantic) a buddy type is getting weight loss surgery. She has little family, her mother is a alcoholic waste and told me she is taking care of herself now and not her daughter. What a mom:( I agreed to take her to the hospital and wait till after surgery. I feel so bad for someone going thru surgery essentilly by herself. She really has no choice but to get WLS, having had one foot amputated, her docs said if she doesnt get the weight off she will soon be bedridden for life. She is in her mid 30s. We have taken her to support group functions and her and jen are friends. Has anyone else done this? My friend is going to a nursing home for a few days after surgery for recovery. I have encouraged here and pray it goes well. Having gone thru surgery myself I KNOW how scary it is.....    — bob-haller (posted on November 24, 2003)

November 23, 2003
All I can think is that she is one lucky woman to have you and Jen for friends! Bless you both!
   — koogy

November 23, 2003
Its tough enough going thru this married but single and alone would be even worse. I guess I identify with how scary it is. Plus I watched jen have a rough time and wonder how my friend will do if she has similiar troubles.
   — bob-haller

November 23, 2003
Bob, I agreed your friend is very lucky to have you for support. I can sympathize as my family is 2000 miles away and I am feeling very much alone. I have a husband but he has been full of himself lately and not very supportive, much like your friends mother. Blessings, Carolyn
   — Carolyn B.

November 24, 2003
Hi Bob, She couldn't have picked a better person to help her through this. Remember you got me through my early post-op.Sounds like she's better off not to have her mother with her.Keep us posted.
   — Debbie W.

November 24, 2003
I can't say that I've done this before, but I think it's fantastic the way you and Jen are stepping up to help. You all truly have a heart of gold. I believe that is one of the reasons why we're here on this earth....to help one another. I pray that all goes well for all of you. God BLess.
   — Myrna E.

November 24, 2003
Honestly were all here a short time and I strongly believe in God and giving something back when possible. Giving isnt necessarily money. For me its been caring for ill parents and grandparents, taking in some friends who house was destroyed by a fire and helping them gut the fire wrecked home, volunteering here as a mod to help the members, helping a friend with a puppet minestries, and a wide variety of other activities over the years, including a outrach to those who need WLS. Sometimes these activities have hurt my income or caused all sorts of troubles, like the fire victims getting so comfy here they lost interest in fixing their home or leaving. That was a bad scene. But somehow they all work out. I believe I get back more than I give, but thats not why I do it. <P> When God calls me home I can honestly say I tried to do good while I was here. Many years ago I nearly died and had a near death experience. I always was a giving type but that really left a impression. You know over the years I met lots of females. Those who looked at me like I was nuts after I told them of helping people never got a second date. When I met Jen she liked and appreciated it. I knew I had a keeper, we have been married over 6 years:)
   — bob-haller

November 24, 2003
There are alot of people in this world who are alone and I can't think of anything scarier than to go thru a major surgery like WLS alone. I would be eternally grateful to have friends like you and Jen and I'm sure your friend is feeling the same way. Your a good man, Bob Haller.
   — Cindy R.

November 24, 2003
Thanks for all the compliments, I just try to help.
   — bob-haller

November 24, 2003
You are a good and kind person. I am single and alone too. Although I did have a friend take me out of town to the hospital and wait till after surgery, I was there the rest of the week alone, out of town. I had friends call, but, it was a long ways to visit. I didn't feel real swell with Open RNY, but would have liked a visitor or two!!! God Bless you Bob. Keep an eye on her after surgery too. I've been out 5 months, and had 7 strictures and a melon size hernia removed. No doctor will touch my case locally, so I always have to go back out of town for my EGD's and surgery. Pain, but worth it, I'm down 89 pounds in 5 months. Take care, and God Bless you all, Kathy Riffle
   — Kathy R.

November 25, 2003
I not only had no one to take care of me, but I had to take care of a toddler IMMEDIATELY upon arriving home 3 days after my surgery. My hubby is in Iraq, and my family all lives in FL. The Army moved us all the way to LA, so I was on my own. I hired a babysitter for the kiddo while I was in the hospital and got him back my first day home. It sucked but I think it forced me to get better faster. I couldn't sit and moan and groan. I had to get up and get going. 2-year-olds wait for no one. I felt GREAT within a week. That's my story and I'm sticking to it!
   — jenn_jenn

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