Question:
I feel like a failure!
My surgeon, who is wonderful, told me Monday that my weight loss (30 lbs in 6 weeks) is not what he'd hoped for. (Me either!) He said that it should be more like 45 lbs. He was very kind and with a little detective work figured out that the "diet" iced tea I've been drinking, along with occasional fruit juice or tomato juice is most likely the culprit. The way he explained it makes a lot of sense, but ol' hyper-emotional me just feels like I'm going to be the one for whom this surgery does not work. Everything else had been absolutely perfect. No complications of any kind. By the way, his nurse practitioner said my target should be 2-4 lbs a week, and that's right where I am. Just need some reassurance here! Thanks! — Patti S. (posted on August 6, 2003)
August 6, 2003
hiya~ first off {{hugs}} you had a major operation, took a big risk, and it
will pay off -- please don't feel like a failure because you aren't losing
"as fast as he wants"...
i think i'd lost around 40-45 lbs at 8-10 weeks post op so it doesn't sound
like you're too far off from where i was.
some keys to help lose the weight are to watch your hidden sugar intake,
make sure you drink at least 64oz of water, get in your required amount of
protein (i suggest especially at your stage to be doing that through liquid
supplementation) and exercise.
if you can walk around the block, do it...if you can swim, do it. you're
still pretty early out from surgery but at your point i was walking.
at 4 weeks post op when i got clearance to drive, i took my daughter to the
local pool at least 3-4 days a week and taught her how to swim. while there
i would do push ups and leg lifts in the water plus swim back and forth. we
also continued walking. we would go to the beach and built up to walking 5
miles 3 times a week.
lots of water, protein, and exercise and the weight will come off. stay
away from lots of carbs and hidden sugars - those will hinder your weight
loss.
the occasional fruit juice or tomato juice shouldn't be a problem. maybe if
that is all you ate/drank but if its a few times a week i don't see the
harm. i couldn't tolerate straight juices (by the way, make sure they are
100% juice, definetely NOT juice cocktails because those are LOADED with 3
types of sugars) so i had to water them down but part of my full liquid
regimen (per my surgeon) included tomato juice...
i have more info on my website, i hope this helped some.
give yourself a big hug and hang in there!
{{hugs}} kate
www.geocities.com/katebme2002
— jkb
August 6, 2003
Oh Patti! Honey- you are NOT a failure. Got it? We rely so very heavily
on our surgeons and want their absolute approval so badly that it can be
devastating when they are nagative in any way. First, understand that I am
sure your surgeon only wants the best for you and wants to see you take
absolute advantage of your 'honeymoon' period. Sometimes we have Dr's that
like to practice a little 'tough love' I know mine does! Second, as you
can tell by his nurse, everyone has a slightly different opinion of
success. You should make up your own mind about what you consider
successful and not rely on other opinions. Especially if you KNOW you are
doing the best you can. 30 Lbs in 6 weeks may be a LITTLE slow, but it's no
disaster! It shows that your tool is WORKING! Just work the program and
get moving. You'll be just fine! Next time you see that surgeon, you'll
be doing fabulous. But, if you don't WOW him, it's OK, because you'll have
learned that the only person you need to WOW is you!!!
— LMCLILLY
August 6, 2003
Hi,
You're profile doesn't have your height/weight on it, but I was considered
a lightweight (5'4", 238lbs) and at my 6 week mark I had lost 27
pounds. My surgeon at BTC said that I was ahead of schedule. As of today
(8 weeks out tomorrow), I'm down 35 pounds. Yes, it's slow, but for the
first time in my life, the scales are going down and staying there. I
agree with the previous poster that you may want to limit your juices even
though they are natural sugars that we're allowed to have. I've noticed
that when I eat too much fruit (and I love it), my weight loss slows.
Good Luck.
— Carolyn M.
August 6, 2003
You are NOT a failure! This is a journey, not a race. You've learned
something new, so apply it and move along. This whole thing is a learning
experience, and you don't get any special prizes for getting to the finish
line first. (At least I don't think so... I was kind of a slow loser, so
maybe there are special prizes and I just don't know?!? :-) Lose those
extra carbs, switch to water, and you'll be just fine!
— mom2jtx3
August 6, 2003
You are not a failure. Just try and switch to water instead of those for a
couple of weeks and see if the weight falls off. The surgery works if you
work it. You are going to do fine. that is a good weight loss. Protein,
water and then carbs.
— snicklefritz
August 6, 2003
It sounds like your surgeon likes a little game called "good cop/bad
cop". I think they play the bad cop so that you will do your best
though I feel that it can be a cruel tactic. I have lost 105 pounds in 7
months and my surgeon never has a positive word to say. He has never yelled
at me though and I have heard him do that with others who are not so
compliant. He believes that if he loosens up then so will we and the weight
loss will stop. Who knows he may be right. I am 20 pounds from goal and the
nicest thing he has said to me is that I look taller. I had heels on so
there goes that one. YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE. Do all of the things that you
know are the right things to do and try to be comfortable knowing that the
weight comes off as it wants to not as we want it to. I would have woken up
thin in the recovery room if that were true. ALSO I am not clear how diet
iced tea would hurt your weight loss. I drink it all the time and at 7
months out I am still loing 2-4 pounds per week. Good Luck !!!!! :)
— Carol S.
August 6, 2003
I lost 23 my first month, 36 my 2nd. I lost up to 16 mo and eventually got
to my goal. I think you're doing great! I don't understand why doc's say
things like that. We all lose individually and the body is in control. I
agree with some suggestions he had but don't think he should be having
"set amounts" of weight loss at a certain time, how much pressure
and depression is that!?
— ZZ S.
August 6, 2003
Don't despair. I also lost very slowly for the first 3 months, and was
racking my brain trying to think of what I was doing wrong. Well, I wasn't
doing anything wrong and eventually just relaxed and let the process work.
I made sure I was eating enough protein, and taking all my vitamins. In
the last two months, I have lost over 40 pounds, almost the same amount as
I lost in the first 4 months. So don't despair, just do what you know you
are supposed to and the weight will come off when it's supposed to.
— Janet S.
August 6, 2003
Don't despair. I also lost very slowly for the first 3 months, and was
racking my brain trying to think of what I was doing wrong. Well, I wasn't
doing anything wrong and eventually just relaxed and let the process work.
I made sure I was eating enough protein, and taking all my vitamins. In
the last two months, I have lost over 40 pounds, almost the same amount as
I lost in the first 4 months. So don't despair, just do what you know you
are supposed to and the weight will come off when it's supposed to.
— Janet S.
August 6, 2003
My BMI was 41 and my 6 week,s wt. loss was 30 pound,s also. I,m 15 months
post-op now and lost 104 ld. went from 230 to 126. You are doing just fine.
— charanewme
August 6, 2003
Patti,
You are doing just fine! There is NO way that the weight is not going to
melt off as long as you are doing everything right. Keep sugar to 3-5 g.
per serving, Get as much protein in as possible, don't drink and eat at the
same time, drink more than 32 oz. of water a day, exercise 3-5 times a
week, journal daily about your emotions, never eat more than what your
doctor says at a time, and relax! IT WILL COME OFF! Look at all these
other thousands of people on here. They are not perfect and it came off.
It will for you too. :)
— Michele B.
August 6, 2003
pattie, your not a failure! we are all different and we all lose
differently some are fast some are slow some are right on target, i was
among the slow losers and happy to say a year and half+ later have lost apx
140+ pnds..give your body time and give ur self more credit be patient with
yourself you will succeed in your journey...good luck to you hon Deanna
— Deanna Wise
August 6, 2003
I started out with a bmi of 42.7 and I had lost 30 lbs. at the 6 week mark
also. Not even a doctor can tell you how much you will lose and how fast.
We are all different. P.S. I am 10 months out and have lost 90 lbs. Only
13 to go.
— joeandteri
August 6, 2003
(((Hugs))) to you. I was discouraged by my loss early on, which was
similar to yours. My doc said that a lb per day was wonderful for that
stage. Actually, my body can be just plain stubborn and I lost more the
2nd month than I did my first. Now at almost 10 mos post-op and -135 lbs,
I'm very satisfied with my progress. So, do cut out the excess carbs where
you can, add in as much water as you can, and then just do your best.
Everyone loses at their own pace. Congrats on your loss & best of luck
in your journey
— Laurie A.
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