Question:
Post op so much to do so little time.

I will be 2 years out in July. Its been a great 2 years:) But my biggest problem is time, or really the lack of it! Between being a mod here, fixing up a home for sale, helping a friend with a inner city puppet minestries, selling stuff on e bay, were broke right now:(, running my business, and trying to have a life with my wife I am SWAMPED. My e mails behind, its hard to do my walking, but I have been getting lots of great exercise cleaning up the house to find the stuff to sell on e bay.<P> Do others of you have these problems and how does one cope? I feel I am burning the candle at both ends and the middle. Heck I wanted to post this for days but havent had the time:)    — bob-haller (posted on June 12, 2003)

June 11, 2003
I feel for you Bob, I really do!
   — [Deactivated Member]

June 11, 2003
About a year ago, I was working full time plus going to college full time to finish my degree. I was tired ALL the time and couldn't figure out why I never had time to finish everything I needed to do. I finally realized after I went to the doctor because I just "felt bad" that I had to reorganize things and prioritize. I couldn't do EVERYTHING, but I could get the important things done first and work on the other things at my leisure. By the way, taking care of YOU mentally and physically should be one of those priorities. It worked for me and I hope it works for you. Good luck. Cheryl (lap RNY 6/2/03)
   — Cheryl M.

June 11, 2003
Bob, I know where you are coming from. I work full time at one job, and pick up weekends (usually 12 hour shifts) at a nearby hospital. My DH works full time and we have 2 grown sons living at home (both work - one 50+ hours per week, the other about 32 hours plus school!) I also have my 85 year old mom (who doesn't drive) to care for, and she lives nearby. Thank heavens the younger son takes care of the yard work at our house and at hers or we would be up to our elbows in grass and weeds! I find time for walking every day - we have a 16 month old, 100lb Rottweiler who needs some prolonged activity every day or he is nuts. With everyone working crazy hours, that job has fallen to me. It has become a priority. I have found this is something I need just as much as he does - rain, snow, heat, dark of night! Sometimes you just need to take a break and say no to some things, and put YOU first. I have always envied people who had time for leisure activities on the weekends - how do they do that? I always have cleaning to do when I'm not working, and the laundry is endless. (Did I mention we have one son's girlfriend staying with us while her family is having a house built? Their house sold fast and the new house is literally a hole in the ground because of all the rain we have had! The rest of her family is crowded in with her grandmother! She works 3 jobs, now that school is out.) And the big projects I want to do - well, I have been waiting 12 years to refinish the floors in my living room, dining room and hallway! I don't even think I have a candle anymore - just a little stub! Bob, I think you and I are probably like 90% of the population - not enough time or/and money! Hang in there! (The walking is probably the only thing keeping me sane.)
   — koogy

June 12, 2003
Bob - I feel your pain. You must take care of yourself or your body will make you - you will get sick and everything falls apart. This happens to all of us, the trick is to keep it short term. Look at what your doing and say "What can give?" Sometimes nothing can in the short term (my DH had surgery 3 weeks ago and is having complications and is back in the hospital, I've cut my hours at work to 6 per day, eat at my desk and the rest spend at the hospital - everything else is on hold. I make sure I eat plenty of protein and get water and sleep.) But you have to seriously say, "Can this be put off till something else is over?" Such as can the inner city puppet minestries - which sounds like a blast - be put on hold till your house is sold? Remember, your no good to anyone if you don't take care of yourself. Good Luck.
   — Sunny S.

June 12, 2003
Bob, you are such a giving person. This time tho you have to make yourself the priority. Are there responsibilities you can give up, cut back on? At one time, my husband and I both worked full time plus each maintained a part-time business from home. We never had any time for "fun", everything centered around work and responsibilities. It took some thought, but we both decided we were happier with a full time job only so gave up our part-time jobs. It was hard at first, but such a relief to have time to ourselves. Hope you can find some solutions that work for you.
   — [Deactivated Member]

June 12, 2003
Hi Bob, I'll give you two pieces of advice. Decide what is most important in your life, and prioritize. The most important things have to come first (your health, your relationship with the wife, work). You may have to give up some of other stuff like the puppets, or moderating here if you don't have enough time left for the priorities. I'm with you, though. Besides a full time job, I am also getting ready to sell a house and my goodness, there is alot of junk to go thru and get rid of, decluttering, storing stuff etc. Add to that the daily cleaning chores, laundry, bills, cooking, exercise, grocery shopping etc, and I wonder how parents find time for their kids activities!! I think the solution is to extend the hours in the day to 30 instead of 24. :-)
   — Cindy R.

June 13, 2003
Bob, I knew I saw you around here a LOT. I agree with the previous poster that you need to consider YOU in the scheme of things. Yes, that's easy for me to say. No matter what you decide to give less time to, that area is going to suffer in losing you...but it is YOU who are important. I have thought of becoming more active on this site, but just can't. I don't have the time and it would be unfair to give up time to other committments I've made. But please do something before none of it is worthwhile for you any longer. Good luck!!
   — Diane S.

June 18, 2003
Hi Bob, I too will be 2 years out in July. I have watched you on the boards since day one, and I commend you on everything your doing. I too, never have enough time. I have been trying to make up for the 13 years prior to WLS. It seems my days are flying by. I have been told the same things as the posters have said here, you have to have "you" time. I feel awful and even selfish when I make "me" time and have to say no to someone, but then I'm reminded that I'm only going to live once. Take a break, from something, even if it's here on the boards, sure we will miss you, but we'll all understand why :)
   — Carey N.