Question:
Has anyone seriously regretted having the surgery?

I'm considering surgery and wonder if any of you have really wished you never had it done. I'm especially wondering about anyone who REALLY misses the eating they used to do, or is disappointed about not losing as much weight as they hoped. I'm self-pay, so this will cost me a bundle as well as being a big life change. I think it's just jitters, but I have thoughts about never again eating 10 kinds of sushi at one sitting, or cooking a batch of chocolate chip cookies. Am I nuts?    — sjwilde (posted on February 19, 2003)


February 19, 2003
NOT ME, I eat what other thin folks do. Watched others on a cruise. I can eat one or two chocolate chip cookies, before surgery I would eat the entire box. All that needless worry about I will never be able to eat XXX again. Just wish I would of done it sooner. Why not get a job at home depot or something like that covers WLS on their health insurance. Self pay if you have complications it could bankrupt you.
   — bob-haller

February 19, 2003
Nope, don't regret it. I LOVE food, and I'd still do this again in a SECOND! I'm a slow loser, but that's ok too. I was scared about never having this or that after surgery, but I don't miss much. I can eat a couple of cookies too. I eat anything I want, actually, just a fraction of what I ate before. :) Don't NOT do it because you'll miss food. Most people are able to eat just about anything within a year's time.
   — Diana L.

February 19, 2003
I do not regret having my surgery, I still love food, just in smaller amounts. There are wonderful sugar free things out there that help with the sweet cravings. I have to tell you it is a wonderful feeling having control over how much you eat and actually feeling full when your done. So it may take you ten days to eat your sushi, but you will still eat it. Best of luck
   — domestic G.

February 19, 2003
The first couple of months I was wondering what I had done to myself but then things got better. Do I regret having the surgery - no. It was worth a couple of months of pain and discomfort to finally be thin.
   — Patty H.

February 19, 2003
YES, for about 36 seconds in recovery, and its been all thank god I did this from there.
   — MICHAEL Z.

February 19, 2003
Well I am only 6 weeks post op, and although as for weight loss I have done really well, at this point I am still saying "why did I do this to myself" logically I know that eventually I will be happy, today is certainly not that time! I have had many complications, and have a surgeon who seems less than interested in fixing the problems. He does however continue to put me on many prescriptions (I am taking more meds now than I did pre surgery) I am not really missing food so much, as I just want to feel better. My main advice is to realllllllly check out the surgeon pre op. Judi
   — Judi S.

February 19, 2003
hi the first mo i would say i wish i never had it done i should of stuck to weight watchers as they give you so much more food to eat, but now i am 9 mos out lost 107 lbs and i feel great and yes i would do it again its just getting thru that first mo that is bad but you get your life back and all my medical promblems went away. good luck /write back if you would like
   — ROSEMARY A.

February 19, 2003
I have not once felt any type of regret for having this surgery done. This is the BEST thing I have ever done for myself...I just wish I would have done it sooner!!
   — Kelly T.

February 19, 2003
I've said it before and I'll say it again..I would be the first in line to have this surgery again if I had to. The first few weeks aren't fun and they aren't easy, but never for an instant did I regret having it done. I am about 5 and a half months post-op, at my goal weight of 130 pounds and wearing a size 6. There is no way in the world that would have ever been possible if it weren't for the gift of modern medicine and for that I am eternally grateful.
   — Samantha S.

February 19, 2003
the first 6-8 weeks were hellish and I regretted it many times, as i was sipping water and gurgling, hating sf jello with a passion, hurting, having muscle spasms in my tummy, and soooo tired. then it all turned around. I have more energy than I have had in 20+ years. i move easier, I am down >70# in 5 months, I am from a size 30 to a 18-20, I sleep better, my aches and pains are sooo much better, my back doesn't hurt, my severly damaged achilles tendon is 80% better. I was taking pain meds every single day for it preop and none at all now. I am off blood pressure meds. I feel FABULOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No regrets just gratitude for my health back
   — **willow**

February 19, 2003
i forgot to say I had all the same worries, I was questioning if I could stand never eating a christmas cookie again, (my fav peanut blossoms) found I can eat one but it doesnt taste as good as it used to. I also found that with chewing much more thoroughly, some things really are not as good as I thought they were. I am stuffed after 4 pcs. sushi, and don't feel at all deprived. It was hard to imagine that I would be satisfied with that preop, but the little pouch fills fast and since I am full , not hungry all the time as on diets I really truely don't feel deprived.
   — **willow**

February 19, 2003
Hi. I am, one week post op. During this past week I have been very discouraged and worried that I may have made a mistake! (Especially with girl scout cookies just out!) I have to say though that I think I have turned a minor corner and don't feel quite so badly. I was able to eat 3 pretzels on tuesday by softening them up considerably before swallowing but still, they were something 'normal' that I had not had and that made me feel good. I was feeling sorry for myself because I was missing the cookies and valentine candy etc. but now I am feeling like things will work out fine. I don't believe that I am a dumper so that helps too! I know that things will get better and that I will soon be able to eat whatever I want only in much smaller portions (2 tbsp. for me now)! Plus... I lost 6 lbs the first week including 15 lbs on the liquid diet that I was on for 2 weeks pre op!
   — Wendi B.

February 19, 2003
The 1st 4 months after my surgery were pure hell!! I hated that I'd done this to myself. I blamed everybody else and myself for doing such a stupid thing. I knew life would never be normal again and I'd rather be dead because of it. I honestly didn't realize how much control food actually had over me. I was constantly sick in the beginning and all I wanted was my food to make me feel better and I couldn't have it. I hope to eventually block those memories. They are the worst of my life. But in my 5th month.. everything changed!! It was like I woke up one morning and everything was all better! I've lost 160 pounds to date, I have an new man in my life and sure I still have problems from the surgery(hair loss, tremors, n/v) but I don't use food anymore. With anti-depressants and therapy I've learned how to deal w/ my issues. I'm not perfect and I will never be, but each day I learn something new about myself. Something that was always there but I never knew about. I get stronger each and everyday. So do I regret it now? HELL NO!! I love my life right now and it's all thanks to the surgery!! I have pics on my profile and pics at picturetrail if anybody wants to see! Good luck and God Bless. You will make the right decision.
   — Diana L.

February 20, 2003
Sandra, I am losing slowly after surgery and have no regrets. (I am 47 years old and have been overweight at least 40 of those years, so I don't expect those fat cells to give up and go away overnight!) You will be very surprised how this affects the way you react to food after you have surgery! One of my favorite restaurants is a Chinese buffet! Instead of loading my plate now, I try a few little piece of chicken and a few vegetables, maybe half a bowl of soup. A bite of sushi does it (looks wasteful, but hey, I am paying the same as the next person; they don't give any price breaks for those who have had WLS.) As far as baking a bunch of cookies, I've done that. We have 4 birthdays in the space of 2 weeks (and now my son's girlfriend's mother's birthday is in the same time period - I made 5 birthday cakes!) I just don't eat the whole cake or a bunch of the cookies. I savor food more rather than gobbling it down. I have found that I like to try new recipes - and my family likes that. I do still have thoughts about sitting down with a bag of Doritos and going to town, but I just can't do it anymore and I truthfully don't miss that. I can eat a few and I am satisfied, not necessarily full. A warm chocolate chip cookie straight out of the oven - yum! One or two little ones will do it, now. Food is our best friend and our worst enemy. Surgery has given me the tools to make it easier for me to control. Recognizing you have these thoughts about food before surgery is good. I think you will do just fine with surgery. As you lose weight the power of food has less of a hold on your mind. Good luck. No regrets here at all!
   — koogy

February 20, 2003
I don't regret having this surgery, I regret not having this surgery sooner.
   — salymsmommy

February 20, 2003
Sandra, I think you are very smart to think carefully about all these issues before you make the decision whether to have this surgery. Too many rush into this surgery thinking that this is the cure-all for their weight problems only to find out a year or two down the road that they CAN and DO regain the weight. It is a huge life change, and while most of us are very happy we had it, those of us who are a year or more out realize that it is WORK and committment to keep the loss going and to maintain the loss. I am a year out and very happy I had it but very aware that if I eat too much of the wrong things, I gain! I have to exercise and eat right for the rest of my life if I want to keep the weight off. Its a huge committment and if I don't I will end up like I was a year ago-fat and very unhappy. Yes, I sometimes miss the eating I used to do, especially when I end up at a buffet (not by choice) and can only sample a few things and just a few bites of each. And there are some favorite foods I can no longer eat, like Chinese food-its different for everyone. But if I wanted some sushi or a chocolate chip cookie or two I could have it, just not the whole batch! So think carefully and don't have this surgery unless you are willing to eat differently and make life style changes for the rest of your life.
   — Cindy R.

February 20, 2003
Hi Sandra. I am self pay also, close to $27,000.00 for pre op tests, the surgeons, and the hospital stay. Then there are constant blood tests, post op that are not cheap, not to forget all the costly meds prescriptions the doc sends you home with! With that said, and almost constant puking, YES, I would have this surgery all over again!! I am now 4 months out, and seldom is there a day I do not puke, some times as much as 4 times daily. It is not the surgery, it is me, after being so used to eating so much food and in such a hurry, I still can't seem to get it through my head, I have a 2 oz. pouch, that only wants 2 ozs. of food! I feel good, and I look good.. have gone from a tight 22 to a loose 16 thus far.. 5'10"..and lost 65 lbs. The surgery is the BEST thing I could have done for myself, even though it is not the easiest thing. I have no regrets even though it does pain me to be around family food gatherings. LOL
   — kd

February 20, 2003
I have a friend who is reconsidering surgery because he won't be able to eat the way he used to. I told him that if he still wants to eat that way (which is what got him to 400lbs in the first place) then he's not ready for WLS. It's not just the surgery, but the realization that food will have a different meaning for us in the future. It has been really, really hard for me to face my eating issues and my relationship with food. I was also worried about not getting to have my ice cream every week. But DUH!! It is this behavior and reliance on food to make me happy that needs to change. Please think long and hard about what you're about to do to yourself. I have chosen WLS because I CANNOT CONTINUE to eat the way I used to. It will kill me. This is a very, very serious thing to do to your body - it's a life commitment, not a quick way to lose. Good Luck!!
   — toolio

February 20, 2003
From the original poster: Thanks so much for all your kind and useful responses. It made me cry to see so much care and concern. You've also really answered my question: People DON'T miss the eating they used to do to an extent that makes them regret the surgery. I know that many of you have also had eating issues your entire lives and it's thrilling to see the courage that all of you have shown. Sandra
   — sjwilde

February 20, 2003
I have been getting ready for the surgery my whole life it seems. I am a huge believer in Overeaters Annonymous. It is a Twelve step prgram for people with eating disorders. It has saved my life! It has gotten me ready to take this huge step. The food is not about the food, it is about the emotions that drive you to it. I have been focused on getting to the bottom of these issues and then the physical..if anyone wants to learn more go to oa.com...or contact me, i would love to chat more about it...f
   — florence H.

February 20, 2003
I don't have any regrets, but I have a response to someone who stated that they told a friend that if they were not ready to give up on their old eating habits, then they were not ready for the surgery. Before I had my surgery, I definitely did not want to give up eating large amounts of food. Still, I was on the verge of being an invalid at the age of 35. I might not have wanted to, but I NEEDED too and that was the point of the surgery, to make me do something that I really did not want and didn't have the willpower to do, so that I can save my life. It took months before I can honestly say that nothing tastes as good as being thin does. That doesn't mean that I don't sometimes feel bad that I cannot eat like I used to. I do, but I am also glad I cannot eat the way I used to.
   — Lisa N M.

February 20, 2003
To quote a friend of mine - "Nothing tastes as good as thinness feels" I have NO regrets!
   — Shannon H.

February 20, 2003
Hi, I'm a little over 3 weeks post-op and starting to feel better about my decision as each day passes. Right after surgery I questioned why I ever would intentionally put myself through something like this but with each day it gets better. And food is not the main focus in my life, I actually could care less if I eat anymore. And take this from someone who was excited to be at home for a few hours by myself so I could eat and eat and eat without my husband asking what the heck was I doing? I was a food addict and after the initial shock that I couldn't do that anymore, I am just fine. I have gotten myself on a schedule now so that I do make sure to eat three meals a day, otherwise I probably wouldn't be. So, it is a major life change, but a change for the better. And, one bite of a cookie is just as good as a whole batch now, you'll see. Good Luck!
   — Dee ,.

February 20, 2003
This is the best decision I ever made in my life. I felt exactly how you do before the surgery. I just about changed my mind at least 1000 times. Don't think that you will never have any of your favorite things again, it will just be in healthy amounts. I still bake my kids cookies, now though I just eat one instead of 10, but I am OK with it because I feel like I ate 10. I am 9 months post op down 124 pounds. I went from a size 24 to a 4 most of that in the first six months. I feel like a new person. I had forgotten what healthy felt like. I run and play with my kids and I am an active participant in their lives now. Before I was watching them grow up. Please read my profile. I think it will ake you feel better.
   — Linda A.

July 22, 2003
To be completely honest, I think most people don't regret it until you have blood transfusions from anemia or marginal ulcers or something. I'm 3 yrs out and just now really having problems. I've had some regrets but I know that it helped me more than it hurt me. I won't say it's the perfect surgery but if your going to die from being overwieght the surgery is well worth the risk.
   — robin T.

October 29, 2003
But to directly answer you, Yes I have regrets. I lost only 60 lbs. and it has disabled my digestive system to the point that I do not aborb any iron. Blood transfusions could be around the corner. I know everyone will get mad for me being honest but it's the truth. I have a 4 oz. pouch and eat healthier than anyone I know but have become "unhealthy" due to the surgery. But I am suppose to be a small number of people this happens to.
   — robin T.




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