Question:
What do you do if you don't have anyone to be at the hospital with you.

My husbands work will not let him off of work to be at the hospital the day of the surgery. I really want someone to be there for me. Just in case something happens. I don't know what to do, I know that you need someone there just in case something happens. Has anyone else had problems with their husbad/wife not being able to get off of work and what did you do?    — Helen W. (posted on December 8, 2002)

December 8, 2002
That is a crime in the highest sense! I tell you what I'd do - if it was me I'd get awfully sick and call in. How dare they tell him he can't be off for his wife's surgery. Is there anyon higher he can go to?I would NOT put up with that NO WAY!! If all else fails tell him to go to work and Have someone call him and tell him there's an emergency and he has to leave. God Bless you - now go fight!!!!!
   — Sally P.

December 8, 2002
Helen, let everyone know where you live and which hospital you will be going to. Ever hear of an angel? thats a person who lives in your area who has had the WLS and volunteers to help you. If you let us know where you are, then perhaps someone from your area will volunteer. Also, does your doctor have a support group? My doc will occasionally ask those of us who are post-op to help out a new post-op either thru a visit to the hospital or a phone call. Check into that. Your husband works for a terrible company-that is very insensitive not to allow him time to take care of family. He ought to think about leaving that company and once he has a new job, letting them know why he moved on.
   — Cindy R.

December 8, 2002
Check to see if the "Family medical leave act" will work for this one surgery day and perhaps a couple more if needed. That is what this law is for. Good Luck!
   — ZZ S.

December 8, 2002
My ex-husband dropped me off at the hospital the morning of my surgery. My sister came up that afternoon, but I didn't have anyone there in the pre-op area nor in recovery when I was taken there. I really didn't care. Pre-op they spent so much time (2 nurses and the anesthesiologist for a total of 5 or 6 sticks) trying to get an IV line started that that took all my time. I don't remember being in the recovery room at all, but my sister was in my room sometime the afternoon of the surgery. Again, I think I was doped up enough that I wouldn't have known afterwards whether she was there or not. You may very well want someone with you the next few days after your surgery more than you will want someone there on the day of. The suggestion to ask for an angel is also a good one. Post to the message board with your name, date of surgery and where you live and ask for someone to be your angel.
   — garw

December 8, 2002
I was alone for all of my hospital stay. The hospital will require that you provide phone numbers for people to contact if something happens. Also, most hospitals have chaplins and other caring people that would be happy to help you with this situation. Let them know about your concerns. You could even ask them to if the chaplin or someone else (a social worker) could talk to you before surgery. They might not be able to stay with you all the time, but I bet they will make an effort to spend some time with you. They might even make some phone calls for you. I know I wasn't able to make phone calls for many hours after I got out of surgery.
   — Scott L.

December 8, 2002
I agree with the previous posters, your husband's work/boss is a jerk! That being said, you could also hire a private duty nurse to help you out while you're in the hospital. Just call the nursing office at the hospital and they will give you the name of agencies you can contact. I won't ever go in the hospital again without someone there to help me. My husband wasn't there during the nights after I had my RNY. While I was in ICU, it was fine. However, when I went into a regular room, it WAS HORRIBLE. Now maybe I'm a wimp, but I'd hire a private duty nurse for after ICU.
   — Kathy J.

December 8, 2002
I had ton of people there and all they did was sit and talk to me...most of the time I just wanted to sleep. It isnt that big a deal...call a nurse if you need anything and enjoy the peace and quiet (can you tell I have kids? LOL). You will do just fine. I your hubby's boss is being a butthead.....I guess he wouldn't be allowed off if you were having a baby??? I agree about the medical leave act...It is a law in many states and your hubby should be allowed off.
   — cherokey55

December 8, 2002
Thank you all for you words of encouragement. And I agree with ya'll....His employer is an a#@. But i would love to have an angle. I live in Little Rock, AR. I think that my mother in law is gonna come down and stay with me at the hospital. She is such a nice lady. Again Thank you all.
   — Helen W.