Question:
Has anyone who has had WLS had a family member who didn't support your decision?

   — malissa R. (posted on March 21, 2002)

March 21, 2002
At first my mother wasn't thrilled with my decision but I had already had it set in my mind after doing months of research that this was the direction I was going. I told her I needed positive, positive energy and attention if we were going to talk about it or we weren't going to talk about it at all...not in detail anyway. I was having a hard enough time handling some things and I didn't need anything negative. What I did though was found some very detailed information on the surgery and on the procedure and what morbid or super obesity problems could cause for a person medically if not treated and also the risks. I showed her the success rate and everything and before I knew it, she was my biggest supporter. To the other people, extended friends & whatnot - I believe it's their problem...not mine. They can judge me with whatever they chose to and say that I'm lazy or taking the easy way out or whatever they want to gossip about - that's their matters, not mine. People usually think something is stupid or a dumb idea because they are either (1) uneducated about a subject or (2) not open minded enough to listen thoroughly about a subject. If you know in your heart WLS is the tool you want to use in getting your health back together - let them just say whatever they are going to say..I'd politely ask as I did my mother so many months ago. I believe they can see the sincerity in asking and most people would do what you are asking. Good luck with it all.
   — Lisa J.

March 21, 2002
I knew when I decided to have the surgery that my mom wouldn't like it. So I purposely waited to tell her. My plan was to wait until about 2 weeks before surgery AND then tell her. Unfortunately, the surgeon's office called and she heard a message on the answering machine telling me the date of my surgery!! For the next 6 weeks I had to hear what a "crazy" choice this was. If I dieted harder I could lose weight. Finally, I had enough and told her that if she was going to continue to be negative I didn't want to hear another word out of her because I needed someone to be positive. I also told her that if dieting worked then SHE would probably be about 80 pounds thinner!! She pretty much kept quiet after that. However, right after surgery when my surgeon came out to tell her that I was fine, she unleashed on him about what a crazy decision this was and she didn't agree with it, blah, blah, blah!! The poor man had my sincere pity. It's been 4 1/2 months since my surgery and I've lost 72 pounds and exercise 5 days a week. She now sees this DOES work and she hasn't said ANYMORE about the surgery. Wait till she finds out about my intended plastic surgery!!! LOL
   — Patty H.

March 24, 2002
MY ENTIRE FAMILY (except my hubby)! My parents and 5 siblings were totally against it and still to this day they tell people how sickly I am and how terrible this surgery is. I am 4 months post op, feel great and have lost 102 lbs and they just won't quit! Feel free to e-mail me if you need any support. [email protected]
   — Lynda T.