Question:
Am I going crazy?

Hi everybody, I'm writing because I wondering if anyone else has ever felt like I'm feeling. I am surgery this Thursday 6/22 and I'm beginning to wonder if it's really going to work for me? I want this so BAD and I know it's my final hope and I've worked VERY hard to get here. But, I keep asking myself "what if it doesn't work?" Is this a normal reaction this close to surgery, or am I going crazy?    — Teresa O. (posted on June 19, 2000)

June 19, 2000
You are not going crazy! I asked myself the same question before and even a few hours after surgery (I am almost three weeks out). Even now, I can't picture myself losing all the weight that others in my support group have but in fact, I lost 8 lbs. before surgery and another 16 lbs. in the last three weeks. Recovery has it's ups and downs - I am totally sick of yogurt. Still, I have very little appetite and surely the weight will come off. Surgery is a scary proposition and definitely a final step. You will be surprised how good you will feel and how quickly you will recover. Take care!! Don't panic!! You are doing the right thing!
   — Barbara S.

June 19, 2000
Hi Teresa, I am having the same feelings that you are and my surgery is scheduled for Friday of this week. I believe it most be a natural feeling that probably many others have probably had as well. It might stem from the fact that we have not been successful so many times before but, everyone has assured me that the surgery will be a tool to help us be successful at losing weight this time. Hoping all goes well for you and that you have much success.
   — Vickie K.

June 19, 2000
First let me say this is pretty normal; I kept telling myself this is it.... I had my Open RNY distal "life-saving" operation on October 14, 2000; I started at 400lbs, I currently weigh 246lbs (-154lbs) I have not deprived myself on what I want to eat; I do however make better choices with what I consume. I worried about this same issue before my surgery; but I also knew this was "it" and if I had not had this surgery I can't even imagine what "shape" I would be in. I feel like a new person!!! I guarantee if you are anything like I was, you want and desire this surgery and you will do great! Good luck!
   — Jamie T.

June 19, 2000
I went through a range of emotions before my surgery. I was originally scheduled for March, but I rescheduled for April & then again for 05/22/00, I finally went trough with it. Even 4 weeks post-op, I still have mixed emotions. My former relationship with food is gone & I'm working on how to deal with it. It's like I lost a friend, when in reality, I got rid of an ememy that was controlling my life. I always had a hard time dealing with change, but I always adapted. I'll adapt to this, too. Every day it gets better. Once it's over with, you'll be relieved & you'll work through the emotions, too. Remember, one day at a time. Can't wait to here from you after you get home. Take care...
   — Anna R.

June 19, 2000
Oh, Theresa, I also understand exactly how you feel. I think for me, having been overweight for really ALL of my adult life, I really can't imagine life as a normal weight person. I have hoped & dreamed of losing the weight for so many years that I still have a hard time believing it could actually happen for me. I am just over two months post-op; I've lost 65# since surgery & 90# overall. This has made a lot of difference so far, but I still have about 100# to go. Even at this point & with the weight I've lost so far I still have a hard time believing it really will happen for me. To some degree it still seems like a dream & I am still afraid the dream won't come true, BUT all evidence points to the contrary...I'm doing great & feeling great, so maybe it really WILL happen! I think your feelings are very normal & understandable. Good luck with your surgery!
   — Kathy W.

June 19, 2000
Hi Teresa! I can only speak for myself... but I have also seen a lot of posts similar and this seems to be pretty common. I have a WONDERFUL and SUPPORTIVE surgeon. I just had to put my faith in him that he knows what he is doing and he has assured me that this does work. :) I had surgery 10 weeks ago and I continue to have anxiety attacks... "what if I quit losing"... "what if I lose it and gain it back". I work through these thoughts by speaking with others who have had the surgery, looking at before and after pics, and imagining what my life will be like when this weight is gone! I guess what I am saying is these feelings will probably continue even after the surgery, so make sure you have a good support network to get you through the tough times. Best Wishes to you and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers!
   — kimberly1224

June 19, 2000
Teresa, this is very normal, so don't fret. When you feel yourself getting anxious, try to busy yourself with other things. You have a lot of changes (wonderful ones, I might add), and it may seem daunting or overwhelming. Just hang in there!!!:)
   — Paula G.