Question:
Advice on starting a support group

I am going to start a support group for recent post ops in my area, starting tomorrow. I have never started anything like this and was wondering if anyone else has. My surgeon's nurse practitioner said that she will answer any questions that can't be answered by us ourselves. That is great to have some backing. Any advise on how to run a successful group? Tell me about the GREAT groups that you have belonged to and how they made an impact on you. Should I keep it to just recent post ops? Say 5 months? Thanks    — Lisa S. (posted on January 14, 2004)

January 13, 2004
A few things I have learned the hard way as one of the facilitators of the new patient meeting and the early post-op support group for our local surgeon. First, you can never really predict what will be the dominant question-- some months, people seem focused on eating issues, other times it's medication interaction or emotional issues. Consequently, it helps to be able to follow some sort of an outline (whether you put it on a flip board or in a powerpoint presentation that you can display). Secondly, there is a fine line between wanting to be supportive of our peers and wanting to help them make the most out of the tool that they've been given by surgery-- only you'll know when you need to pass out the rubber bands and tell some people to snap out of them. Lastly, people get restless, particularly if they are not participating-- having as many longer term post-ops present as possible helps a great deal because they can answer many of the questions based upon their months or years of experience. Good luck-- make your peers feel connected, be honest about your experiences and let them know that everyone benefits from participation in a support group. Much of my weight loss (and now weight maintenance success) is attributable to the guidance I've received through my support groups and to the focus on the whole program that serving as a facilitator requires of me.
   — SteveColarossi

January 13, 2004
Steve is right on having some long termers present for the meetings. A friend and I started a local support group because our surgeon did not have one and because we thought it was a good idea. Our biggest problem is getting the people that have had surgery to show up. It seems most where I live either don't want to be reminded that they weren't always so healthy looking or just don't want other people to know they had WLS. Anyway, good luck on your support group because without one, of somekind, the struggle to lose and maintain is much harder. Good Luck and God Bless!
   — Angela P.

January 14, 2004
My group was started by a woman prior to her surgery. Flyers were posted at our surgeons office, we booked a room at the hospital where we had surgery. She notified anyone list in OH that had our surgeon etc. We have both pre-op and post-op.
   — Kriola

January 14, 2004
Hi, I belong to a great support group here in Houston. It was started a Kimberly Taylor, check it out. [email protected] We meet once a month. My suggestion is that you do not limit the group. We have pre ops trying to get info, through long timers 2+ years post op. As a newbie, myself I can tell you that it is beneficial to get the advise from people who have gone through all the stages. many of our group have had the same surgeon, but not all and most have had RNY.
   — Carolyn B.

January 14, 2004
the reason i didn't like my support group was because it was about 80% pre-ops and new post-ops. we had guest speakers and the info was great......if you were looking into wls or had just had it. the people who were farther along really didn't get much support or help because all of the questions and talks were about new people. what happens to people who are 5 months out...when you really really need the support and your honeymoom period is coming close? or what about someone who is a year or 2 out and having trouble maintaining? the good thing about having post-ops that are farther out is that they can answer certain questions about long term ect.....but most time post-ops a year or so out get left in the cold.
   — franbvan

January 14, 2004
I go to a support group at our hospital and I will share a few things that I have learned:<br> 1. Most of the questions are asked by pre-ops, or very recent post-ops, because they are needing the most information. They were so focused on just getting an approval from insurance and a date (understandably) that they might've missed some critical info along the way, or didn't get it all and still need it.<br> 2. Most post-ops stop coming after the 6 month point.<br> 3. If there is no clear agenda (like all meetings) the meetings go downhill fast.<br> 4. The discussion is focused on eating 80% of the time.<br> 5. People are pretty uncomfortable in an auditorium setting.<br> <br> This is just my opinion here... but I think that it seems that a lot of post-ops get to a point when they forget that they were pre-ops at one point, and craving any information they could get. And they stop being a sholder to lean on. And they lose patience with pre-ops pretty quickly. <br> Also, I think as post-ops it helps to stress how much the emotional factors weigh-in (no pun intended) after surgery- dealing with people, family members and co-workers especially. <br>If I was starting my own support group, I would have an outline and pick subjects for the next 6 meetings, and leave discussion time for the second half of each meeting. <br> I would also make sure the meeting place is in a comfy setting. And don't limit the group dynamic... otherwise you might find yourself with a very small group.<br> Just my two cents, since you asked...<br><br> Good luck, and bless you for giving something back. <br>Check out my website www.rnylacrosse.com or email me at www.kultgirl.com :)
   — kultgirl