Question:
I am kind of stressed here and need a litter advice....Help Family!

I am being considered for a new job. Things look very positive that I will get the job. The problem is that I have been waiting to have surgery since I was still a student. I graduate in 6/03 but my surgery isn't scheduled until Feb 04. My surgeon's office says there is a strong possibility that I will be moved up to late October or November of this year. How do I handle this with the new employer? This is a government position and I don't want to miss out on this but at the same time, I have been waiting a long time for this surgery and now that it could possibly be around the corner, I fear that I may have to wait until this time next year. Any advice you all could offer would be most appreciated. I always read these boards and I see how you all help everyone. Please help me too. If you want to e-mail me directly, you may do so at [email protected]. Please insert WLS information or AMOS family in the RE: section so that I will know it is from you. Thanks, Jeneen in PA    — Jeneen (posted on September 9, 2003)

September 9, 2003
There are two ways to go with this. You could not tell them, it really is none of their business, and once you have the job and are GIVEN A SURGERY DATE (I wouldn't count on the moving forward part 100%) then you simply submit a FMLA request for medical leave. Tell them you were expecting to have medical treatment next year, but your surgeon feels it should be moved to an earlier date. What you are having done is certainly none of their business. The other way is to be honest - tell them you are expecting to need some time off for medical issues but that they should not affect your work before or after the surgery. Then kiss the job goodbye! I have been looking for a job both times I was pregnant - both times I was told "Thank you for being honest" (I wasn't looking pregnant at the time) and one said "...but we will have to give preference to a person who isn't going to need a large block of time off fairly soon after starting the job". The other (it was a part time job) said - no problem at all - we will work it out when the time comes. They can not legally discriminate against you, but whether it was medical related or not, if you were hiring someone, they would have to knock your socks off for you to ignore the fact that they would need a leave from work in the near future - whether medical, personal, any reason. I think that February is far away enough that you needn't tell them. If you do get offered an earlier date, you can decide at that point whether you are secure enough in your job to accept the sooner date or not. Good luck!
   — bethybb

September 9, 2003
HI I WORK FOR THE GOVT. AND AFTER YOU GET YOUR 9O DAY OR WHAT EVER THE TRIAL PERIOD IN YOU WILL BE OK. THEY HAVE TO LET YOU OFF WITH A MEDICAL EXCUSE.FLMA WILL NOT HELP YOU UNTILL YOU HAVE A YEAR IN.THE SICK LEAVE WILL PROBLEY BE WITH OUT PAY. I WOULD WAIT TILL THE NEXT YEAR ONLY BECAUSE YOUR MEDICAL INSURANCE DEDUCTABLE WILL BE GOOD FOR THE WHOLE NEXT YEAR. GOOD LUCK
   — patty L.

September 9, 2003
This is the way I would look at your situation if it were me.... "I will have many job opportunities in my lifetime... but I will only have one life"..."Which one will serve my future best"? Love and light, Lisa
   — medium

September 9, 2003
Hi Jeneen- That's a toughie, being faced with 2 wonderful opportunities that will conflict with eachother. I would suggest that you tell your surgeon that you need to go with his/her original surgery date (Feb 04) due to work issues. That will hopefully allow you to get your foot in the door at this new job. Twelve years ago, I was out of work and looking for jobs. During the process of going on interviews, I found out I was pregnant with my son. When the place that I was interested called me and offered me the job, being young and overjoyed, I gushed to the women that I just found out I was pregnant. She didn't share my joy and said "Oh....um....well, I'm sure you'd rather not start a new position at this time, SEE YA, BYE!" She couldn't get off the phone fast enough, LOL. Actually, she was correct, I didn't want to start that job after discovering I was pregnant. Hope it all works out for you, good luck with both things:o) Mea
   — Mea A.

September 10, 2003
I would be up front with them. Just let them know that you are scheduled for a medically necessary surgery (you don't have to say what it is) and want to make sure that you will be able to go through with it. Let them know that you would be willing to postpone if you had to for the job, but that you would prefer to get it over with as this is something you have been planning on for a while. Good luck.
   — Dawn P.

September 10, 2003
There is NO WAY I'd tell them about surgery. If so, chances are you can kiss that job good bye. I'd get the job, but wait at least 3 months and PREFERABLY 6 months before surgery. I'd want to be established and show them that I am WORTH them keeping me after surgery (and not to hire someone else while I'm gone). You can always shedule surgery, but how many of us get a chance for a really good job of our choice. There is no way I'd screw the job up!
   — Danmark

September 10, 2003
Original Poster Here - thanks to all of you for your help. I think sticking with the original surgery date would be best because I would be established in my position by then. Please pray for me that it all works out because even though I feel this way, in the back of my mind I keep thinking of how long it has taken me in this process and how I could be just a few months away from surgery FINALLY and I really don't want to pass that up. I don't know, I'll have to keep praying about that. Whatever God has for me is for me. Thanks you guys (and gals). Jeneen in PA
   — Jeneen