Question:
Should I get pregnant now or after surgery?

I am in a quandry. I know I want a second child, and am unsure if I should have a baby now or after surgery. I know that it's better to be a healthy weight before conceiving, but here's my problem: I am 34 amd in law school. I won't graduate for at least another 2 years, and I can't just get pregnant the minute I start a new job. So I'd be at least 37 or 38 when the baby is born. Plus, working in a law firm means a lot of hours. Right now, even though I work half time and attend school, my hours don't even equal 40 a week (I don't study much!) I am in optifast right now as a prereq to surgery, so I am losing quickly. I hope to get down to 200 pounds, which is where I was when I had my first, and everything went fine then. And I wouldn't have to worry about the baby getting enough nutrients. What do you think?    — [Deactivated Member] (posted on October 30, 2002)

October 29, 2002
First, you cannot get pregnant for at least 2 years post-op. Second, If you can diet effectively you probably don't need this surgery. Please remember that this is a radical procedure that will forever change your life. If you can adjust your weight without it make the attempt!! Don't get me wrong, I am very happy that I had this procedure, but if I could have lost my weight effectively on my own I would have. Just something to think about.
   — Sonya C.

October 29, 2002
Inga, I am experiencing your same dilemma. Read my profile regarding this issue. However, I think it is important for you to talk with your OB/GYN and your wls surgeon to enable you to make an informed decision. Good Luck to you!
   — Patty E.

October 30, 2002
Sonya: I have tried many diets before, and have always done well for a brief time, then gained all the weight back plus more. That's the reason I am looking into WLS. Every time I diet, I end up weighing more! Yes, I am doing well now, and maybe getting pregnant will be an incentive for me to continue to lose more. If I do the surgery now, it'll be at least spring before I am scheduled, then 2 years before I can get pregnant. That puts me at about graduation time, so then I'd have to wait probably another year. Does anyone know which poses more risks -- being overweight (say 200 pounds) or being older at conception (say 38)?
   — [Deactivated Member]

October 30, 2002
At 29, I have more wiggle room in the timing of these things - and as such I'm opting to wait to have my first after WLS. But, you asked specifically, what do I think - and I think you should have a baby before. You have no idea what kind of complications you might run into - and they recommend you wait atleast two years after to conceive. If you would be absolutely devastated to not have another child, I would say go for it now. There are plenty of fat mom's out there, that had healthy babies. On this site, we focus so much on the bad things that can or have happened to us because of our weight. Not to minimize anyone's feelings, but I see fat womyn with babies all the time!! Just my opinion!!
   — JAFMartin

October 30, 2002
I would definately have the baby first! It is a myth that women can easily get pregnant well into their late 30's. Fertility starts to decline at age 27!!!! If you wait, it may be too late. 200 lbs doesn't sound all that unhealthy to me - as long as you watch how much weight you gain during the pregnancy. Having a baby just after joining a law firm would also be a no-no. My husband is a lawyer and in order to be on the "partnership track" one must work an ungodly amount of hours. You'd be better off with a toddler than with a newborn! Good luck!
   — mandajuice

October 31, 2002
Inga -- If you'd like to email me about this, I'd be happy to talk to you. I am 33, no kids (yet), 10 days post op, and a former lawyer. I practiced for 5 years in big firms and am now a headhunter for lawyers. I have definite feelings/ advice that comes from being on both sides of the fence(s): pre/post op, lawyer/headhunter INTIMATELY familiar with the legal market now.
   — Tamara K.