Question:
Why am I so crabby at 8 weeks out?

I am usually a very nice person, but ever since surgery I have had absolutely no tolerance or patients with people, especially my poor husband who has been so supportive. I am cranky, and easily snap at people. I g et easily frustrated and want to cry and throw things. It is freaking me out because I am not normally like this. Please help me!!!!!    — Heather M. (posted on July 15, 2003)

July 15, 2003
Other than the major surgery and the MAJOR life changes you are going through there are actually good solid reasons for what you are going through. We store estrogen in our fat cells and because we lose weight so darn rapidly we have an enormous amount of estrogen running through our bodies especially early on. It can make you feel like you have permanent PMS and it does fade with not too much time. Other than that the emotional stress of all of these changes are tougher on some of us than others. I include myself in this category. I have always been pretty cheery or at least fun and I have heard that some people in there post op honeymoon phase are just thrilled with everything. The weight loss puts them on a high. I have yet to experience that and I have found that it is such a drastic change going from a snug 24 to a 12 in 6 months that my head is spinning! Don't get me wrong I am thrilled and would do it again in a New York minute but it is a rapid and drastic change that can be a rough adjustment. Good Luck and keep talking about it! I thought I was going nutters!!! :)
   — Carol S.

July 15, 2003
Well said by the poster below. I totally concur. It is normal and everybody I knew told my honey to "watch-out" for mood swings. We just have to readjust to it. Kinda sucks some days, I know. I'm just 18 days post-op and have what some describe as constant PMS. I become aggitated with friends and family and the next moment I want to cry and hug them. But by godly we WILL get over this :)
   — Christina S.

July 15, 2003
Boy, I could have written this question!! I am 5 1/2 months and, for some reason, this didn't start for me until about a month or so ago. Not only am I irritable, but I have absolutely NO sex drive right now!! My poor husband! I kept telling him that our sex life would greatly improve when I lost weight because I would feel so much sexier! It wasn't bad before, but I just never felt all that appealing. WELL, he's still (patiently) waiting!! I hope it comes back soon!! I did some research in the archive Q & A's and found out that this is all perfectly normal and will pass. THANK GOODNESS!!!!
   — Kathy S.

July 16, 2003
In addition to the reasons that other posters have given, I think there's a psychological component as well. Many obese people (myself included) are emotional eaters. Before WLS, food was my drug of choice to soothe my feelings and eating was the solution to all my problems. I got so good at eating my emotions that I lost touch with my own feelings. It was hard for me to even identify them: was I angry or frustrated? Did I feel afraid or sad or lonely or anxious? I wasn't really sure. It took a while for me to stop self-medicating with french fries and ice cream and get back in touch with myself. I went through an excellent group therapy program called Dietless (they recently changed their name to Conscious Eating), designed to help women get in touch with themselves and normalize their relationships with food. It was Dietless that finally helped me get to the point where I could accept that WLS was the best solution for me, and I'll be forever grateful for that!! I would've had a much more difficult time dealing with the aftermath of WLS if I hadn't been so well-prepared psychologically. So, back to your question: with WLS, we're no longer able to eat our emotions, so they may express themselves in other ways. You might be feeling something other than just plain crabbiness, but may not be able to readily identify the emotion. My advice when you get crabby is to take a moment to get in touch with what you're really feeling, think about why you're feeling that way, and take some kind of action (that's not food!) to help yourself feel better. Hope this helps, and for what it's worth, I still get pretty cranky sometimes, too!!
   — Maggie T.