Question:
Can anyone lend a hand with pre-surgery terror?

I am 7 days and a wake up from surgery. Every day my anxiety gets worse. I have nightmares, feel like I am stretched as taut as a cord, crying all the time and having so many second thoughts...even though I know I will go through with the surgery. What did others do to drive away the terror?? How will I ever get through another 7 days???? Thanks...    — Kristine P. (posted on April 29, 2002)


April 29, 2002
Hi- I am right there with you-my surgery is next Monday and the terror is just setting in. All I can say that helps me is prayer.
   — Jennifer P.

April 29, 2002
honey most of us can relate. our terror may be at different levels but its still there. Some of us handle it a little more quitely than others. Try to think constantly about how you're going to feel in about 2 months when that weight is coming off and your starting to feel better. I am now soon 4 mo post op. It is so grand!!!! I'm in size 16 already in some things and i love it. From 275 to 200. I look back at how scared I was and all the uncertanties. And i keep thinking of that scripture that reads something like (jackis paraphrase) what good does it do to worry about tomorrow. Will it change a thing? No, just rest and trust in the Lord. THIS IS NOT AN EASY TASK. AND NO SURGERY IS. We all fret in one way or another. Our thoughts and prayers are with you. Write if you get scared. Will be glad to help in any way i can.
   — Jackiis

April 29, 2002
I have my surgery this thursday. I am actually surprised by how calm I am. I have no second thoughts or anything. I know this is right for me. I am actually super excited. I'm sure I'll be a basket case on Wednesday. Best of luck to you my friend...
   — candymom64

April 29, 2002
Hi Kristine! All of us have had those awful, terrifying feelings leading up to surgery. When I was about a week away from surgery, I think that's when I was the most terrified, but getting closer and closer, I had this calm kind of wash over me...someone "up there" telling me it was going to be alright! My Mother was more terrified even when I was in pre-op...I just couldn't wait at that point. I told them I was getting bored and if we could get on with it!! They all laughed! I think humor is a great way to deal with your fear as well! Another thing that worked for me was looking at all the before and after pictures and reading profiles of those who have walked this journey before us! God Bless You! May He watch over you and your family during these next weeks!
   — LaRayne H.

April 29, 2002
Hello my friend - Please know my thoughts and prayers are with you in helping you to find a calm & peace prior to going into surgery. I truly believe it's such a big key in coming through with little to no complications. Please, take a moment to read my profile - know the only reason I'm not going to try and list it all out here is because I believe you'd like to get my information as I was putting it in. I keep a diary/journal on this page for this so I can go back and read what my thoughts were during a certain time of my path. My surgery was on April the 9th, 2002 and I'd like to offer the month prior to it (or more - whatever you want to read) in seeing how I handled it and the thoughts & prayers that crossed my mind. I'd be glad to add you to our prayer group - we have a small WLS prayer group for just this type of thing - it's helped a lot of us. Please, any of you, feel free to send an email or prayer if you'd like to be added or join the prayer team. Bright Brilliant Blessings to you.
   — Lisa J.

April 29, 2002
Hi...my surgery is this Thursday and I am at peace, at least with my decision. I do have some anxiety as I may have to be intubated while awake. Other than that, I do not have second thoughts now. I know another diet would just have me losing and gaining all over again. I need this tool. I think, for me, having waited 14 months for this surgery, it certainly gave me time to do a lot of research, etc. (on this site every day), so I do feel well informed and I know what I'm getting myself into. I gave this over to God a long time ago, and He has brought me this far. I think the thing that gives me the most peace is that I know another diet would not work for me. At age 48, I've been to hundreds of Weight Watchers meetings, etc. And also I can't wait to be cured of sleep apnea and GERD, as well as lose the weight. Think of your "entire" situation...getting rid of co-morbids plus getting to a healthier weight. That should calm the second thoughts right down. Hugs, Joy
   — [Deactivated Member]

April 29, 2002
Consider asking your surgeon, or your primary care doc, for a prescription for a small number of low dosage Xanax to help with your anxiety this week. If you let them know how much this is affecting your sleep, they should consider it beneficial to a smoother surgery and good outcome. Xanax is addictive, but taken in very low doses over a short period of time for specific situational anxiety, it doesn't cause problems. It can make a huge difference in your life!
   — BethVBG

April 29, 2002
Proverbs 3:5&6
   — blank first name B.

April 29, 2002
.....And Xanex
   — blank first name B.

April 29, 2002
Hang in there, Kristine. I felt the same way. I even started reading the memorial pages and thought about canceling surgery. I thought I had one more diet in me!! Then one day it all calmed down and I realized this was the last house on the block for me. I've tried every diet and diet pill, what did I want to look and feel like another next year??!! Remember why you are having the surgery. I prayed a lot and asked others to pray for me too. I will say one for you. God bless, everything will be ok. There is only 1% chance of difficulties, but what are the odds of surviving obesity?? Love & Blessings to you, Jeannette Curtis
   — Jeannette C.

April 29, 2002
I posted this exact question (or very similar) on April 26th. It is question #114. I received wonderful responses back, feel free to read them. After doing alot of reading I have decided that almost everyone goes through some stage of worrying and second guessing. Remember, this is an elective surgery we are having, we are conciously choosing to do this. I believe this is what is most hard, wondering if we are doing the right thing. I have been concentrating of the positive outcomes and looking in the future. I too like many other posts have given this whole process up to God, there really isn't anything more we can do. God bless and Good Luck!! ((Hugs)) Tracy
   — Tracy T.

April 29, 2002
I am 8 weeks post-op and went through a lot of what you are going through the last few days. What if I didn't make it. What if I had problems or complications. I think it is only natural to be very nervous and frightened. To deal with it, I tried to keep busy, read lots of positive things on this website about surgery and rented a few comical movies to take my mind off. But also dealt with it spiritually and put my fate in God's hands which I feel like really made the most difference. I had a close call and stopped breathing the 2nd day after surgery (from sleep apnea because a nurse had turned off my oxygen), but believe it was God's will that I would be OK and everything turned out OK. My wife came in at that precise moment and alerted the nurses and I wasn't breathing, and they were able to get me going again and get my oxygen levels back up. I honestly believe that that was God's way of saving my life. Good luck and God Bless.
   — Dell H.

April 29, 2002
I can totally relate to what you are going through!! I am about 3 weeks post-op & went through the same exact things. I actually even went to my PCP Dr. to get some Zanax (sp) or something to relax me & he said NO!! UGGGG!! I cried, I woke up in the middle of the night out of a dead sleep scared to death, I didn't sleep most of the time, I was a bear to be with because I was soooo moody & tired the whole nine yards. I think we all go through that to some extent. I think what kept me somewhat sane is taking, taking, taking with my friends & family about the surgery. My boyfriend said he felt like he could do a seminar on the surgery because I talked so much about it..lol! Looking at all the posts on this website is a great help to get a feeling of what to expect and also being with my family and friends as much as possible. I also tried to keep myself as busy as possible & prayed all of the time. So, I hope that helps a little. Best of luck to you! 3 weeks post-op & down 30#'s!!!!!!!!!
   — Allison T.

April 29, 2002
4 1/2 weeks post-op and went through the same thing. To take my mind off of things - checked the Q&A postings daily - joined the chat rooms, began a journal, looked at before and after pictures, started theraphy, told my family that I was really anxious and needed them to support my needy-ness. You are not alone - lots of us have been where you are. Occupy yourself w/preparing for life after surgery and learning everything you can.
   — Yvette W.

April 30, 2002
Well, I'm not sure this would be considered "emotionally healthy" by psychologists, but I really dissociated right before my surgery. Whenever a scary thought would enter my brain, I would push it out and become staunchly non-emotional about the whole thing. When family/friends would give their opinions about all the things that could go wrong, I would simply say, "You're probably right, but anything would be better than living this way." That shut them up. As far as quieting my own fears, I would constantly run my favorite thought through my head: "If you don't change directions, you'll end up where you're going." And where I was heading was to a miserable life full of health problems, discrimination and poor self-esteem.
   — Terissa R.

April 30, 2002
My surgery is scheduled for Friday and I have had my moments, I know I will still go through with it. I just pray.
   — Tomecka B.

May 1, 2002
Hi Kristine! You are not alone!! I also went through the same thing. I was an emotional roller coaster. What helped me is that I put my life in God's hands. Only He is in control....please remember that and pray! I am 8 weeks post-op now and feeling great! God Bless, good luck and lots of (((hugs)))
   — scodorniu




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