Question:
Why is it that when I look in the mirror, I still look really fat?

Why is it that when I look in the mirror I still look really really fat. I can't see that I have lost that much weight, but others can see it. I can tell because of my clothes, But I can't see it I am 4 months post-op and down 54pds. Is this just a mind thing or what? Is it just me HELP!!!!!!I started out at over 326 by my doctors scales and now I'm 272. Is this a good weight loss?    — Antoinette P. (posted on March 1, 2001)

February 28, 2001
HI - 2 1/2 years ago I lost 70 pounds...then regained 85. Funny thing is I could NOT see the difference on me..until my daughter should me a picture without the 70 pounds. YOu know what my first question was? Who is that? and then I said OH MY GOD!! So yes, I believe it is in the head!! Start taking pictures....as you loose....then start comparing them...you should be able to see the difference. I am again dieting...started this past Sunday am down 9 pounds...hope to loose 40 before my surgery May 29th!! You are doing GREAT!! Good Luck!! Karan
   — chance2lv

February 28, 2001
I AM GOING THROUGH THIS SAME THING 9/15/00 317LBS NOW AT 241LBS (DOWN 76LBS)BIG DIFFERENCE!!! BUT I STILL SEE THE SAME PERSON IN THE MIRROR. NAKED I STILL HAVE EXACTLY THE SAME BODY SHAPE WITH THE EXCEPTION OF MY BOOBS BEING LOWER. PEOPLE FIRST NOTICED MY WEIGHT LOSS IN MY SHOLDERS OF ALL PLACES AND FOR 5 MONTHS TOLD ME SO. SO NOW I CAN SEE THAT MY SHOLDERS LOOK SLIMMER BUT THATS ABOUT IT. I SWEAR SOMEONE IS SNEEKING INTO MY CLOSET AND MAKING MY CLOTHES BIGGER BECAUSE I CAN NOT POSSIBLY BE SHRINKING. SO DON'T FEEL ALONE... OUR MINDS KEPT US IN DENIAL WHILE GAINING THE WEIGHT.. I STILL LOOK FINE... AT LEAST I DON'T LOOK LIKE HER... THESE DON'T FIT BECAUSE THEY ARE OLD... ETC... OUR MINDS ARE SO USE TO KEEPING US IN DENIAL ABOUT GAINING THE WEIGHT THAT THEY DONT KNOW ANY OTHER WAY. I JUDGE MY PROGRESS BY MY WEIGHINS AT THE DOCTORS OFFICE EVERY FEW MONTHS AND BY THE OOHS AND AHHS OF MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY.. AND BY THE RUBBERNECKING OF MALE DRIVERS WHEN I AM OUT AND ABOUT IN MY TRUCK. THIS IS PROBABLY THE BEST SIGN FOR ME. IN THE LAST MONTH OR SO I HAVE GOTTEN SO MUCH ATTENTION IN MY CAR OF ALL PLACES. I GUESS I LOOK DAMN GOOD FROM THE SITTING POSITION. LOL! :) KEEP THE FAITH... I KNOW THAT OUR PERSPECTIVES WILL CHANGE. HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY, SYDNIE
   — sydnieb

February 28, 2001
I've seen similar posts in the archives here, about weight loss starting in the face, neck, etc. Women tend to lose from the top to the bottom. It makes it harder to see the weight coming off of the other parts of the body, hips, butt, etc. Try not to focus on the negative, but realize that even though surgery helps, it's going to take time. Give yourselves a break, and try not to expect perfection. After all, this is supposed to be freeing, not further the obsession with body image and food. If you want to keep track, try taking weekly snapshots, trying on a "goal" pair of jeans, or taking measurements. That way, you aren't so focused on the mirror image and numbers on the scale. Wishing you much success!
   — Amy K.

February 28, 2001
I am down 85 lbs. and when I look in the mirror, I see the same body I saw before. I *know* I have lost the weight, because my clothes are smaller - I've gone from a size 24/26 to a 12/14; and if I really pay attention and examine my body meticulously, I can see the changes. But when I just look at myself, without studying, I would say I look just the same way. For the first time, I can understand how people with body image disorders can look at themselves at 90 lbs. and think they are fat. - Kate -
   — kateseidel

February 28, 2001
Antoinette ... I hate to break it to you, hon, but you're completely normal. I'd bet ALL of us suffer from this post-op. I think the psychological term for it is "dysmorphia", or being unable to see our body as it really is. I'm still amazed when I can fit into clothes seven sizes smaller than they were before I had my surgery last April. Strangely, it's the exact opposite of what I was before surgery -- pre-op, I was always AMAZED at how HUGE I was. It was quite startling to realize I didn't fit through a turnstile or into a chair or barely into size 32 clothes. It's a head thing -- and I'm sure that eventually we'll be able see ourselves as we are. And 54 pounds in four months is amazing ... when was the last time you lost that much weight in that little time and kept it off for more than five minutes? You go, girl -- and don't sweat it. Eventually the head and the mirror will come together. Warm skinny supportive thoughts,
   — Cheryl Denomy

February 28, 2001
I think this must be one of those phases that many of us go through. I updated my profile yesterday and as I was reading through the old notes I noticed I had posted a similar statement. You will notice a big change very soon. I don't know about you, but I avoided looking at myself in the mirror before I got in the shower. Not to be vain or anything, but now there are times that I look at myself and am totaly amazed at the change. (Of course there are times that I would swear that it is my Grandmother I'm looking at with the way things sag now! I see a tummy tuck and breast lift in my future!!!)If you haven't done it in a while check your measurements - it's a way to prove to yourself that you really are losing. Keep up the good work and congratulations on the 54 lbs. you have already lost.
   — georgiacarol

March 1, 2001
When I look in the mirror, the only difference I can "see" is my collarbones, slimmer face, and loose skin everywhere. Without my progress pictures I'd be lost. The funny thing is, I have a coworker who can tell when I've lost another 5 lbs. She has been so accurate, she'd bet her paycheck on it! Dysmorphia is the correct psychological term.
   — [Deactivated Member]